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Do I need another wide belt? Nope, but I sure want this one.
Wide belts are a wardrobe workhorse — they completely transform dresses, high-waisted trousers, and even outerwear. This sculptural belt from Isabel Marant is three inches wide and features a distinctive loop. It comes in black, chalk, and rust (the perfect fall color).
This belt is $585 at Nordstrom. It comes in sizes 70 (28 inches) to 95 (38 inches).
Sales of note for 12.7.23…
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Nordstrom – Holiday sale up to 50% off; up to 40% off selected designer styles
- Ann Taylor – 40% off your purchase & extra 15% off sweaters
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- Talbots – 40% off your regular-price purchase; 50% off all sweaters, coats, shoes & accessories
- Zappos – 34,000+ women’s sale items! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 60% off sitewide; holiday deals $5+; up to 70% off clearance
- Crate&kids – Free shipping sitewide; up to 50% off toy + gift event; free monogramming for a limited time only (order by 12/15)
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- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off your purchase with code; up to 60% off present picks
- Old Navy – 50% off pants for the family; clearance styles from $2.99; 30% off your order, even clearance
- Pottery Barn Kids – Holiday sale up to 50% off; free shipping on 1000s of items
- Target – BOGO 50% off select toys; 30% off kids’ & toddler sleepwear; buy 2 get 1 free kids’ books
Bean74 says
Gosh, I love this. I had a gold obi-style belt that I bought from The Limited circa 2011-ish. I wore with a burgundy dress and felt like a million bucks. Kicking myself now for not hanging on to the belt.
HSAL says
The Limited in the 2008-2013 time period was my JAM.
Anonymous says
I was just cleaning out my closet and thinking about how I miss The Limited from that era!
Anon says
I miss that version of the Limited so much! I was in law school and starting my career as a lawyer and I bought like literally 98% of my wardrobe there.
PinkKeyboard says
I posted last week asking about my daughter’s social issues and then broken collar bones, colds, and life intervened so I couldn’t follow the comments and respond same day. Thank you so much everyone for your responses. It was very helpful especially to hear from the people whose children also have IEPs for social skills, the guidance counselor seemed very dismissive. She does see good modeling (we socialize with the neighbors, have people over, she sees us talking and socializing in public). She is in gymnastics, ballet, church/Sunday School and goes to a reading tutor (that she originally needed, now she’s advanced-but she loves it and it’s a good social activity as there is the tutor as well as three other children). She enjoys all the activities and specifically asked to do them but she never talks to the other children there. I’ve arranged private testing with a provider who offers social skills groups and am pushing the school to do testing also.
Anonymous says
My daughter is good at drawing and can tie her shoes. I thought her fine motor skills were OK but with other things (trying to do a basic ponytail), she is really just unable to do that. Also with doing buttons on the back the neck of shirts / dresses. I thought fine motor skills were sort of all or nothing and that we were fine based on her drawing well and tying her shoes. But I feel like maybe there are some lurking issues (like she cannot do her hair at all — just brushing). She is in 5th grade now and now that schools are open, I don’t have time to be doing hair daily or helping with dressing. She’s never had the big giant barbie head to practice on and now I kind of want to get one (or something . . . advice? If it is sort of a life skill problem, I actually want to get her the right help.]
Spirograph says
Since both things you mentioned require very specific arm movements and are behind her back… I wonder if this is actually a fine motor skill thing, or rather a gross motor skill thing or a doing-things-by-feel-because-you-can’t-see thing? Can she do buttons when she’s looking at them, for example? Can she do a ponytail in someone else’s hair? And is she really unable, or does she just like to have help? My daughter is capable of putting her hair in a ponytail, but she still asks me to do her hair because she just likes the attention and ritual of it.
But yeah, a giant barbie head might be fun to practice hairstyles on; I had a doll that I tried out all the Braids and Bows styles on before I attempted them on myself when I was about her age. Learning to braid on something you can see is way easier than trying for the first time on the back of your head!
anon says
Um. I am a 42-year-old who needs help with buttons on the back of the neck and has very few hairstyling skills (hence why I keep it short). Some of us are just bad at this stuff? I don’t think I have overarching issues with fine motor skills. I am excellent at painting and am pretty meticulous with baking/decorating fancy cookies, for reference.
Anon says
+1 I can’t do hair at all. It’s not a fine motor issue. I’m just bad at hairstyling.
anon says
I’ve even watched YouTube videos to try to get better! I’m a lost cause at this point. My poor kiddo gets simple braids and ponytails and that is literally it.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Hi – Just want to say I am your daughter. I have great handwriting (but a thumb grip – I guess no one ever caught that), a good hand at drawing (for someone who isn’t drawing for a living), but I never got “good” at doing hair (and my mom was great at it). And now that I have kids I realize certain things were harder for me – like tying my shoes, zipping/buttoning, etc.
I still struggle with jewelry clasps and things like that (luckily I married someone with excellent fine motor). I do wonder sometimes if it’s some very minor fine motor thingy like you mention but overall I’m doing pretty well – college, law school, good circle of friends/family etc.
Karolin says
I wasn’t able to do my own ponytail until around age 11 I learned the trick to flip my head upside down and gather all the hair in one hand with gravity helping keep it smooth – have you shown her that?
Buttoning behind one’s back is challenging, period – why does a 5th grader need clothes with those features? There are so many other options.
Also I mean, doing a ponytail takes maximum 3-5 minutes? Buttoning a shirt takes 10 seconds? So I understand if you want to teach your kiddo a life skill but “I don’t have time to help with her hair” doesn’t seem to make sense.
EDAnon says
I also couldn’t make my hair into a ponytail until middle school (maybe 12 or 13) and I somehow figured it out. I do think it was motor skill development combined with practice.
NOVA Anon says
I learned on my American Girl doll using a Klutz book on braiding as my guide. As an adult, I can do passable a everyday hairstyle on myself (I keep it long and use a straightening iron to smooth but not pin-straight). But if you want French braids or a special occasion up do, then I’m your woman…
Vicky Austin says
It took me until middle school to do a ponytail by myself. I still can’t braid my own hair.
Anon says
So, one option is to do hair at night. I’m thinking French braid or even a simple braid can be pretty tidy overnight. As for basic hairstyling, if you want her to do it solo, then she needs to practice. I’d ask her what hairstyles she wants to do and then on the weekend, I’d practice with her. Can you incent her with a special headband or clips to make this more fun? I will say, as someone whose mother sucked at doing hair, I learned to do my own and my sisters and there is an entirely different set of hand motions to doing someone else’s hair vs. your own. Doing your own hair is a skill set that just requires practice.
Anonymous says
My mom definitely did my hair until middle school.
Anonymous says
Same. Do her hair. It’s your job.
Anonymous says
No, this isn’t a fine motor issue, it’s an issue of why do her clothes have buttons on the back (what is this, Little House on the Prairie?) and doing one’s own hair neatly is difficult unless one has perfect sleek straight thick hair.
Aunt Jamesina says
It’s funny, but with boys you’d literally never know if they lacked these skills if they dressed in “boy” clothes and had short hair because they don’t seem to ever have buttons on their back and (aside from combing), don’t need to learn how to do their hair!
I’m 37 and I call it good after I run a brush through my hair and let it air dry. My hairstyles are down, messy bun, or sad ponytail.
Anon says
Same same
AwayEmily says
actual lol at your spot-on description of my three hairstyles.
Anonymous says
me too! I sometimes watch hair styling youtube videos and always end up thinking that any ponytail that takes 3 products and 10 minutes to create (after which the influencer inevitably chirps “in no time at all!”) is a juice-not-worth-the-squeeze situation.
I *can* braid my own hair, but I save it for the pool/beach. I do prettier braids and buns for my daughter just because we think it’s fun and/or it is ballet class-approved.
Anne-on says
I’m showing my age but the only ‘styles’ I ever mastered are blowing out my hair (90’s blowout), flat ironing it, throwing it into a sad ponytail for the gym, or twisting it into a (fake) chignon and securing it with a wide barrette. I’m in awe of other women who can do elaborate hairstyles and I am so happy I don’t have a kid demanding Elsa braids…
Anonymous says
I think this is a question for your ped. I think at best there might be some exercises/suggested ways to practice her motor skills (be they gross or fine).
To those who are saying “do her hair, it’s your job,” I think you are missing the point that she’s concerned about her daughter.
Fwiw my daughter is about to turn 9 and does her own hair just fine. Her ponytails aren’t perfect but she is definitely not in need of assistance unless she wants something fancy. We only buy clothes she can put on/take off herself but she has rompers with a back of the neck button and has no issues (I made her prove she could do it before I bought the romper!).
anon says
How much do you contribute to your kid(s) 529 plan? And how much would you contribute if you could (max amount)?
Anon says
Currently putting in $250 a month.
We’re also fortunate to have parents/grandparents who like to gift money every once in a while. So we’ve been putting those funds in kiddo’s 529 as well.
Our goal is to have about $100k in the account when they graduate high school. With the way tuition is increasing (Vanguard college tuition calculator has caused me more stress than it should), that’s probably not going to be “enough”. But it feels like a good start if kiddo wants to go to in-state public college.
I also do not live in a state that allows for tax deductions on 529 contributions. If I did, that would be my starting point.
Anon says
Two kids and started contributing once they hit public school. Our goal is also $100K/kid when they graduate, which we should be able to reach. (We were paying about $30K/yr daycare for both kids – we’re aiming for a little over $20K/yr combined into the 529 plans.)
It probably won’t be enough, but I also can’t see spending the estimated $250K 4-year in-state tuition that they’re projecting for our state. That does not seem like a wise investment for any sort of undergrad degree.
HSAL says
Right now, zero. Mine are 4, 4, and 6. They’ve got about 10-15K apiece from grandparents, so I’m not especially concerned, but as soon as everyone is in public school we’ll probably start contributing $50-$75/kid/month.
Anon says
$5k/year, which maximizes a state tax benefit. We could contribute more, but I don’t want to earmark too much money for education for a few reasons: 1) $90k + growth will be plenty for our perfectly fine state universities, where there is a good chance my child will go, 2) if she’s able to get into elite private universities we’d be eligible for significant need-based aid and 3) grandparents have expressed interest in helping if we find ourselves in a situation where she wants to go to a good private school where we can’t get need-based aid (we’re not interested in paying for a private school that’s worse than our State U and will communicate that to our child as she gets older). I’d also rather throw extra cash at our retirement than her college funding. In a worst case scenario, there are loans and merit scholarships for college. There are no scholarships for nursing homes.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Agree that you should focus on maxing out your own retirement accounts before college tuitions, and that’s the advice most financial planners give. Right now, we are able to max those out and still do $500 per kid (2) in their 529s per month. Grandparents generously contribute every now and then too. Our goal is probably around $150K per kid when they’re done, and hopefully that will be enough for a good state school including room and board and extras, and we’ll have to see how we handle private schools.
Anonymous says
We have one three year old. We have a goal to be able to fully fund four year private school (tuition, room and board), at what the expects cost will be in 15 years. So far this has meant putting in large chunks of our annual bonuses and any monetary gifts our child has received. We already fully fund retirement and back door Roth IRAs. Currently there is $75k in the 529, and we re assess each year what we can give and the performance of our account with our FA. We don’t know how long we’ll be able to do this with bonuses, so we’re front loading to take advantage of time.
Anon says
Three kids, we do $1000/year and when we have a little windfall we pop in more (eg, when we sold our house we put $5000 into each, we put in some of the Covid child tax credits, etc). It’s not as much as I’d ideally want to save, but we have to balance with retirement, general savings, and the expenses of life.
Anonymous says
We’re doing $250 per kid per month at the moment, but I need to up it to $417 per kid per month to max out our state tax benefits. Not interested in doing any more than that. My husband and I are both veterans, and have lots of degrees between us, none of which we paid for, ourselves. I want my kids to have the option of going straight to college after high school if it seems like a good path for them, but…. there are lots of other good paths, so I’m not putting all our financial eggs in that basket.
Anon says
Three kids @ $800/month each to maximize our state tax benefit. My kids are 10, 8, and 6, so we upped our contributions after daycare expenses ended. Sometimes I’m really happy with what we are able to contribute, other times I worry about my 10 year old. We were only able to start saving this much in the last 2 years, so she doesn’t have nearly the benefit of time that my youngest will have. Based on their personalities, she is also my most likely to want to go way out of state. As I’m typing this out, I may shift some additional funds towards her and away from the 6 year old, who will have more time. Prior to these last three years, we put what we could in based on bonuses or life events. Some years, that amounted to $500 per year, and others, we could add a couple thousand dollars.
Anon says
$4K per year to max out state tax deduction. Any shortfall will come from grandparents or current income or discretionary savings.
startup lawyer says
10k a year
Anonymous says
My husband has a GI bill that we can split between them, but we contribute $100/month per kid and grandparents gift $1000/year per kid. I think we should contribute more but..life costs a lot! We expect them to attend an in-state state school, or 2yrs of community college followed by state school.
Anon says
If it makes anyone feel better, our kids are 4 and 2 and right now, we’re not contributing anything. We have a FT nanny that we pay on the books, which is about $60k/year. Once we no longer need FT childcare (2 years from now), we’ll start contributing. We are high earners but just bought a home in a VHCOL area, so we’ve been prioritizing down payment + retirement savings. We get no state tax benefit so there’s no advantage to contributing right now, and we don’t have any family members who are in a place to gift us funds at this point.
Anon says
Honestly if you can afford a $60k nanny you can probably just cash flow college out of current income?
My daughter attends daycare at a university. Her daycare tuition is more than undergrad tuition. (It was almost double the undergrad tuition when she was a baby). We are saving in case she goes to a private school, but it kind of makes me laugh when people ask how we’ll afford college. Uh we won’t be paying for daycare and college is cheaper than that?
Anonymous says
Don’t be so sure. I thought the same thing back in the days when my daughter went to a university day care and her tuition was higher than undergrad tuition. A decade later, that same excellent state school costs over $40K per year (in-state), which is way more than day care in these parts. My own law school tuition at the same school nearly doubled while I was enrolled. Tuition inflation is insane.
Anon says
Oh wow $40k is crazy high for a public school! Our state U is $10k in state so even if it doubled it would still be less than most people spend on daycare per child. And we’re actually eligible for tuition discounts as employees if our kid goes for undergrad but sadly that didn’t extend to daycare so that’s another reason it will be cheaper. But yeah like I said we’re saving money for college so we have options. I still think it’s crazy that the “tuition” checks we write for a 3 year old who spends her days playing make believe and coloring are more than it would cost to get a business or engineering degree from a very respectable public U.
Anon at 12:45 PM says
Honestly, that is a thought I’ve had before (and a motivating factor for me to keep working). We will likely try to save to make it easier on our future selves but we can hopefully cash flow a decent portion of it starting in ~14 years.
Anonymous says
I have 3 kids. There is 75k in my 8 year old’s, 25k in my 6 year olds and ~8k in my 4 year old’s. We out in about 1k/month spread out across the accounts each month and more for windfall cash.
We are aiming for ~150k or so per kid by the end of high school. Our kids may have inheritance from grandparents to help with college so we don’t want to over save in a 529.
FWIW DH and I both went to a private college (tuition where we went is $89k/year now). His parents paid full freight for his; we got a lot of financial aid and I graduated with $65k in loans.
Anonymous says
I am almost 8 weeks pregnant and the constant nausea is killing me. I am sucking on ginger candy, wearing seabands, and just started the B6 and Unisom regimen. Nothing seems to make even a tiny bit of different. How do people do this? I can’t see how I can make it another 4-6 weeks until this allegedly magically disappears.
Commiseration says
painfully. there was a fizzy drink mix that I liked this time around – check that out as another tool in your arsenal. I’ve almost quit my job every time I’ve been pregnant in the first trimester, but I promise you’ll get through it! Maybe ask about zofran? Not sure what the guidance on it is right now but my OB said she’d rather give me zofran than get dehydrated and throw up all the time.
I had the seabands too! I sort of liked those.
Anon says
Agree with almost the quitting every time I’m pregnant. I WFH so it was the only way I survived. I basically did the bare minimum amount of work.
It’s really terrible and I can totally relate. I lost 10-15 lbs the first 8 weeks and started vomiting clear liquid. It was bad. The unisom and B6 combo worked for me only if I took it at the same times each day. If I missed a dose it was misery for at least 24 hrs. Zofran has some other undesirable side effects but if the B6 and unisom isn’t working I’d try it.
Sebands and ginger did not work for me. Also didn’t matter if I had a full or empty stomach. I drank a lot of sparkling water. I wanted to scream into the void every time someone suggested I try preggiepops.
I’d also say that everyone is different with when it starts getting better. I wouldn’t get better until around 18 weeks and then the migraines started…I know someone who vomited everyday until they delivered.
Anon says
this is not going to be the answer you want, but you make it through one minute, one hour, one day at a time. when i was pregnant i didn’t have my own office, but i always sat near the ladies room so i could go in to vomit when no one else was in there bc i hadn’t told my work yet. i would pinch myself to try to distract to get myself to wait when possible. the thing i found most helpful was constantly grazing. i carried around a gallon sized ziploc bag filled with cheerios. i used to wonder the same thing during my pregnancy, and figured it must be worth it in the end or no one would have another kid? my mom was notorious for having the worst nausea during pregnancy, like throughout the entire 9 months. so bad that back in the mid 80s, her office designated a bathroom stall for her. hang in there!!!! being pregnant (even when really wanted) can be the worst
anon says
I had about 6 weeks where I was eating 3-5 lbs of baby carrots a day because the only thing that kept me from puking was to eat constantly and carrots worked. I was convinced my baby was going to come out orange.
Unfortunately for me, the nausea didn’t go away until the baby came out. It was pretty bad for all of both of my pregnancies.
Ashley says
Prescription meds! Diclegis to start and zofran if necessary.
CCLA says
Yeah diclegis was way more effective for me than the roll your own variety of unisom and b6, but I think insurance required trying that for a short period before covering the diclegis. Made a huge difference though.
Anon says
+1
Anonymous says
Zofran
Anonymous says
+1. I took Zofran for 9 months. The nausea magically disappeared as soon as baby was delivered. The sad hospital breakfast the next morning was the best meal I have ever eaten.
anon says
Yes same here! I had a c-section and I swear when they took the placenta out I felt like the nausea magically lifted. And then I was HUNGRY for the first time in 9 months. The post-partum pizza party we had in our hospital room was the best. (I also had gestational diabetes so carbs were pretty much out during my pregnancy.)
Colette says
It’s just brutal. I found that it was helpful to have a very full stomach at all times.
It’s gross to force food down when you are really nauseous but it was the only thing that helped me.
Anon says
Just take it a day at a time. Don’t let yourself get hungry because that will make you feel worse. Certain foods may help. For me it was fruity things like freeze pops or those terribly named preggie pop drops.I drank a lot of water with nuun tablets in it.
Hmmmm says
It’s so hard! I will say that for me, 5-8 weeks was the worst and I started having more “good days” around 9 weeks. Some days I even felt normal or almost normal. So while you can’t count on it, there is hope that it won’t be this bad as long as you think.
Vicky Austin says
This was me. Drinking water and eating before I got hungry helped me most. Also, if it’s an emergency, humming stops your gag reflex. Other than that, all I can do is send you good thoughts.
Abby says
Sorry to hear this ): I’m around 11 weeks and have been in the same boat/gotten very close to tears a few times from how terrible I feel. Starting Unisom was life changing for me. I also started eating heavy carbs every morning I wake up and it seemed to push it off til at least mid afternoon, but agree that trying to keep a full stomach helps. I try to eat every 3 hours.
Anonymous says
I agree with the above posters that diclegis (time-release combo of B6/unisom) is worth trying — worked way better for me than B6 and unisom on their own. Sour stuff worked well for me — lemon candy, lemonade. And I liked peanut butter sandwich crackers to snack on and try to have a little carbs + protein as I could.
Anon says
Everyone’s experience is different, so take anything I say with a grain of salt. What works for one person might not work for someone else.
My nausea hits around 7-8 weeks and lasts until 13-14 weeks. I feel fine when I wake up in the morning and then the wheels start coming off the bus around 3pm.
Things that help me:
– Exercise. I don’t feel nauseous when I’m moving. I worked out every day and took long walks with the dog/our toddler.
– Front loading food in the morning because I could eat whatever I wanted then, so I would get in all the nutritious stuff knowing that dinner might be plain oatmeal and 2 potato pierogies. Breakfast was the time for fruits, veggies, protein, healthy fats etc – I generally had a huge smoothie with berries, spinach, avocado, coconut oil, chia, greek yogurt, banana, and spices. I needed two 16 oz glasses to hold it. Plus other food. As much as I could eat before noon.
– COLD water and sparkling water
– COLD grapes
– Going to bed as early as I can. Most nights I was in by 6-7pm
– Ginger ale. Ginger candies, preggie pops, etc. did nothing for me.
– Seabands made me feel worse
– B6 and Unisom but only at bedtime b/c otherwise I was too sleepy during the day
Also TMI but it can be hard to keep regular when your eating and hydration are all out of whack, so I had a bowl of fiber cereal every day.
Pogo says
I liked watered down ginger ale (full flavor made me feel worse); in my second pregnancy I liked cold water with lemon.
Agree on the fiber, or in my case miralax in my smoothie every morning.
anon says
I had hyperemesis so I had to do Zofran, but I was nervous about it so I took as little as possible. But some days it was necessary when I couldn’t even keep water down. I was miserable for my first two trimesters. I had to get weekly IVs starting around week 12 or so because I was so dehydrated. Diclegis (B6 and Unisom combined) and seabands did nothing for me. Diclegis just made me terribly drowsy. I still can’t stand the taste of ginger.
Anonymous says
Like. Maybe taking the zofran you needed would have helped?
A says
I snacked on saltine crackers constantly. It definitely helped but I also put on weight that’s still there four years later so . . .
Anonymous says
Mine did not disappear until I have birth. As a result, I loathed being pregnant and this is probably a small part of why I only have one child. I just want to validate that it is miserable! For me, giving up on making it go away was kind of freeing – radical acceptance. Hopefully yours will actually get much better soon though.
Anon says
Our just turned one year old pulls on her hair as a soothing mechanism while she sucks the finger on her other hand – and she’s getting a bald area on half her head! Did anyone else go through this – any tricks? It was maybe even cute until we realized she was pulling out all her head. Pediatrician said we could make that hair oily or greasy so she liked it less? Ugh.
AwayEmily says
Mine twirled her hair while sucking her thumb. one time she got it so badly knotted around her finger we had to cut the hair. I do not have advice other than you are not alone and she will likely grow out of it!
Anon says
When did yours grow out of it? Mine has been a finger sucker since birth but at age 3 or so added hair twirling into the mix and is still going strong at almost 5. We’ve had some incidents where the hair got very badly knotted. But she really struggles with emotional regulation so I hate to take away any self-soothing mechanism.
AwayEmily says
When she stopped sucking her thumb, which happened (with our help) at around 5.5.
Anon says
Thanks! I may come back to you in 6 months asking for advice on how to stop the hand sucking. Our dentist is pretty chill until permanent teeth come in and it isn’t causing social issues (mostly happens in private) so we’ve agreed to leave it be for now but probably we should do something about it before she starts K next summer.
Isabella says
Grandparents are starting to ask about our Christmas list, and I like to shop early too. Budget will likely be 50-100$ with maybe one or two bigger splurges. My mom’s a whizz at optimizing the best value or best fit for our life style, so the shopping research is often part of her gift.
What were the fun and practical things you enjoyed from 9 months old to 17 month old? I’m thinking a water table for next summer? Maybe some play food?
anon says
Shopping cart or doll stroller. First doll with bottle.
Play tunnel or tent.
Pop up books.
anonM says
A few things that will kind of grow with LO: hooded beach towel, step stool, nap mat (IF you use daycare and your daycare will allow you send at 1yr old, apparently some places don’t like them so YMMV), baby highlights subscription, dishwasher safe/easy to clean bath toys and scoop/net
Anotheranon says
omg the nap mat. why is my child obsessed with it!?!
Anon says
water table is a great idea. play kitchen. stroller + doll or shopping cart to push. duplos or mega blocks. a nugget
anon says
I’d hate storing a water table for months before it is needed.
Isabella says
Eh, I have more storage space than time or mental energy. If I wait till I need something, I rarely get around to buying it until after the moment has passed.
Anonymous says
Some kind of ride on toy (for either indoors or outside). Mine got the Radio Flyer Busy Buggy for her first birthday, and at 2 she still likes to tool around the house on it, yelling VROOM VROOM VROOM. The bonus for her is that it has a trunk she can stash random things in – goldfish crackers, my hair ties, small toys, etc..
Anonymous says
What would you do: I got to the office and realized you can see a bit of my bra peeking over the neckline of my shirt. Options are (1) ignore, (2) wear blazer tightly wrapped so you can’t see it, or (3) run to Uniqlo (only clothing store nearby) at lunch time and get a new shirt.
Anonymous says
Ignore.
Anon says
Can you tape the neckline of your shirt to the bra so it can’t slip out?
AwayEmily says
Yes, tape. But also I would use this as an excuse to go to Uniqlo.
NLD in NYC says
(4) Safety pin?
Karolin says
Yea probably just put the blazer on over it. Not sure what “tightly wrapped” means, does it mean you’d literally be clutching the blazer in front of you? Or just that it’s buttoned/tied?
anon says
2
Hmmm says
Ignore and put on blazer for meetings and when leaving your office/workspace
Anonymous says
I would ignore or take the opportunity to run to Uniqlo and get a drapey scarf thing to wear today and keep in the office for future cold days/spills/etc.
Anon says
Same.
Anon says
Potty Training Survey — when was your child(ren) consistently able to get #2 in the toilet? Ideally, the age that they actually would consistently get it in the toilet, with or without prompting, and how long after being trained with #1 did that happen?
I ask because I am currently potty training my third child, and I can’t tell if I’m just really, really bad at potty training, or if people just don’t talk about how hard it is get trained with #2. All the books/online resources seem to think both come around the same time. But with all three of my kids – who have very different personalities – they were consistently trained with #1 after like a week, but it took another 6+ months to get #2 trained. I have had a kid who became horrifically constipated for like a year until they felt comfortable using the toilet, then a kid who just went in their pants for like 6 months, and now I’m back to another kid who is horrifically constipated after three weeks of training. Am I just really, really bad at this? Or is this normal? All three kids were 2.5 to 3 years old at time of training. I’m feeling a little defeated at dealing with another six months of dealing with #2 accidents/constipation issues.
Anon says
I think it’s just dumb luck. My oldest has had many #1 accidents but has a perfect #2 record from the day we started potty training.
Anon says
I had an unusual potty training experience – #1 was extremely difficult for us due to my child having extreme fear of the potty and not being able to release pee on the toilet. We didn’t worry about #2 until we had finished #1. That didn’t happen until very late (age 3.75), but then we trained #2 in about two or three days. My kid had constipation issues since starting solids that got worse during pee training. So when we were finally ready to train #2 we got a laxative prescription from the doctor, she had a couple of accidents and then started going in the toilet and never had an accident again. For about six months we made her try on the potty after dinner every day, which helped with constipation (and maybe accidents? although we weren’t diligent about it when traveling and she didn’t have accidents then). I feel like we had an unusually good experience with #2 but we deserved it after our terrible experience with #1.
Anon says
As I’m feeling sooooo defeated already on this third round with training #2, and I don’t want that to impact my kid, can you please let me know how you didn’t deal with #2 until after you trained #1? Did you just use a pull up? We have added a daily probiotic and prune juice to try to stay out ahead of the issue, but I would gladly push this training out until my child can express an interest in being trained with #2 (which was around 3.75 for the other kids).
NYCer says
FWIW, my daughter continued to go #2 in a diaper for quite some time after training #1. She was still wearing diapers at night time, so she would just hold it until bedtime (in which case we would change her diaper again before actual sleeping) or she would go in the morning in the diaper shortly after waking. It eventually resolved itself.
Anonymous says
Thanks for this! This is what is happening with my son, and I wasn’t sure if we needed to wake him up earlier and put him on the potty or just wait it out.
Anon says
So unfortunately constipation is the answer – she was only pooping every few days, and she normally did it in her overnight diaper (which we continued using until she was fully trained for both #1 and #2). She was actually in underwear during the day months before she was pee trained. She’d tell us when she needed to pee and we’d give her a diaper and she’d pee in it, since her issue wasn’t bladder control or communication, it was just a fear of the toilet. I think we probably could have done the same thing with poop? But it was a non-issue because she pooped so infrequently and always overnight.
As far as fixing the constipation, we tried probiotics, prune juice, increased fiber, tons of P fruits, Miralax…basically everything you can find suggested online. Nothing moved the needle except the prescription laxative. As soon as she was pooping in the potty daily, the constipation issues basically vanished (although we do continue daily prune juice popsicles because she does trend in that direction). I think it was mostly a psychological issue.
NLD in NYC says
Solidarity. I tried training DS when he started showing signs that he was ready to use the potty around 2.25. Gave up after a week. Take Two started a little better, but then refused to use the potty. Back to diapers we went. We’ll still ask him to use the potty before bath time and we’ve had more success this past week (even a couple of poops!) for no good reason. With the long weekend coming up I’m tempted to try Take Three but I feel like I’m setting myself up for disappointment again. DS is now ~2.75. Should I bother or wait longer?
Anonymous says
I’ve only trained one so far (really not looking forward to the others) but it took several months of daily miralax to get him to go #2 on the potty. I think he was close to 3 or maybe a little over. He trained #1 at 2.5
Anon says
honestly my kid maybe had one #2 accident ever, but we have sooo many pee accidents. my 4 year old twins have each now gone through stages where they don’t want to stop playing to go to the potty and have so many accidents. i see them wiggling and they refuse to stop to go potty
Anonymous says
Both kids did #2 reliably before #1 so maybe our family is an outlier. We also trained on the later side – 6 weeks before age 3 for older son, a couple months after 3 for the younger one. Both kids picked it up quickly at that point.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Honestly – I didn’t even start thinking about it until DS #1 approached 3. He showed 0 interest (ever) and I had A Lot of Things going on from 2.25-3 that did not make it a fit. The suggestions I got from our ped at the time were not helpful. Once we started (with preschool’s help) I think it took roughly 2 weeks for him to really get it, including accidents, with 1-2 accidents after he “got” it. There were a few weekends where I was taking him to the potty every 30 minutes (like setting a timer) but in hindsight it seems a lot more reasonable than Oh Crap (again, no shade, you do what works for you and yours).
Caveat I’m also a lot more laid back about this particular milestone. DS #1 is 5 in a few months and still wears a pull-up to sleep at night (which is dry 90% of the time) and I don’t know that I’ll stop until next year. DS #2 is 2 in a few months and unless he shows interest, which I doubt because he’s very laid back so far, I don’t plan on touching this until close to 3.
DLC says
For what it’s worth, until she was four my niece would only poop in a diaper. Poop is so frustrating because it is just so gross to clean up. Until my third kid was #2 trained I would put her in a Pull Up if we were going out and she hadn’t pooped yet that day. I’d say it took her about four or five months to finally poop consistently in the toilet. She toilet trained at 2.5 years. My older kids who trained when they were 3 and 3.5 figured out poop much more quickly.
You are not bad at this. Toilet training is hard and there are an infinite variables.
Anon says
This is really helpful, thank you. I think I’m there – I’m getting so defeated with #2 accidents, but I was afraid of going backwards since peeing is going well. My kid is able to hold it, and so unfortunately, when the accidents do come, they are happening during dinner/bed time routines. I am usually solo parenting all 3 at the time, so the timing is just really hard. Or, I’m at an evening soccer practice for an older kid when the accidents happen. I think I’m just going to switch out to pull ups at night until my child is ready to use the toilet for #2, and hope #1 continues to progress.
And thanks to all of you above. In a lot of ways, sounds like there is no real way to predict. We did everything *right* with this kid — they used the toilet for #1 and #2 before we started to train without issues, we waited until they wanted to get trained, we watched You Tube videos, we followed the Big LIttle Feelings course, etc. etc. And things were great for 3 days, and then, just like my other two, the bottom fell out for going #2 around day 4. Ugh. So helpful to hear others’ experiences!!!
Anon says
Big Little Feelings doesn’t have any original advice. All they do is copy and past advice from other people. Kristin doesn’t even have any credentials besides being a mom to two still fairly young kids. It’s the biggest scam IMO.
Anon says
This isn’t really helpful unless you’ve got a #4 to train in the future, but when my kids started showing interest in the potty I made sure they peed a couple times and pooped at least once before we officially trained. That seemed to take the edge of any pooping fear. I’m sure it was also a bit of luck – two boys, both trained at 2.5 on the dot (cold turkey), each had only one poop accident in their life. (They we’re also cloth diapered, which anecdotally may help with earlier training). We’ll see if my boy #3 makes a liar out of me, though!
ll says
#2 has been hard for all 3 that I have potty trained thus far. I think my first finally got it around 3.75 years (we started his trainings around 3years 3 months), my second around 3 years 4 months (we started his training around 3), and my third is currently great at #1 but hit or miss for #2 (he is 3 years 2 months). My husband and I have decided that toilet training is the worst parenting job. We have one more kid to go after this . . .
I don’t think you are bad at it, it is just so kid dependent that the books only work when they are going to work.
Anon says
OP here, and solidarity all. Thanks for chiming in – sounds like, for the most part, it’s hard for everyone one way or another. I appreciate not feeling like we have just failed at potty training (husband and I always laugh that we are the common denominators between three very different kids, so it must be us).
Per my note above, you guys have given me the mental space to just say that pull ups in the evening when accidents usually happen are just fine, and that we will get there eventually (kid just turned 3 in September, which is when we started training). Me not losing my cool during a stressful few hours is better than sticking to the books on this one. I already decided to put pull ups on my child for our soccer game this evening, and am more relaxed for this outing than I have been for any other event since we strarted this sh!tty process.
Anon says
bday gifts for 5 year old boys? like for a classmate?
Cb says
I like the 3 in 1 Lego technik sets. I keep a couple in the cupboard.
Anon says
For classmates I do a $10 Lego set, a Build Your Own (monster truck, robot, etc) sticker book, and/or a pack of two Hot Wheels monster trucks
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
I give a GC to Amaz*on, Target, or a local bakery/restaurant if I know the kid/family likes it.
Anonymous says
Gift cards for Barnes and Noble and ice cream are also great. I don’t think A-zon is as much fun as an actual store for kids this age.
NYCer says
$10-$20 lego set.
Anon says
+1
Anonymous says
Due to pandemic and general shyness, our second grader (older child) has just started playing with our neighborhood kids and everyone is now allowing indoor play. Real question: do you keep your house straightened up in case random neighborhood kids drop by? Our house is clean but most of the time messy both because we don’t usually prioritize straightening over exercise, family time etc and probably our standards have relaxed over time when we never had anyone inside our house. For those who aren’t super tidy people naturally- do the neighborhood kids just see the mess? Did you change our ways? Things like kid gets dressed for school on the living room in a big rush so pajamas are on the floor, breakfast dishes may be on the table (good at clearing other meals but mornings are rushed), laundry baskets in the hall, matchbox cars everywhere.
NLD in NYC says
Honestly, I just want to know where this magical neighborhood is where kids still drop by randomly to ask if little (insert child’s name) can come out to play. Sigh.
Sincerely, an Elder Millennial
Anon says
Me too.
Anon says
I think it happens more in elementary? My kid is almost 5 and pretty social but none of her school friends live nearby and the kids she meets at the playground she doesn’t know well enough to show up at their house. I think once she’s going to school and has classmates in our neighborhood things will be different. Hopefully?
Anonymous says
OP I am also an elder millennial:). We totally lucked into a neighborhood that has kids everywhere, like over a dozen within our block and more around the corner. We’ve been encouraging our kid to play for almost two years and he’s finally comfortable enough! One facet that I think does contribute is that we live in a highly orthodox Jewish neighborhood so there are a lot of kids hanging out on Saturdays- it’s definitely not just those kids who are out playing, (Christian, non religious and non orthodox Jewish too) but there is a nice default that certain kids will be hanging around available to play basketball or whatever. And maybe kids have had fewer after school activities, plus all the kids were home every day for a year.
Anon says
Virginia DC suburbs and happens here with DD’s bestie across the street. And if other (older) kids are playing outside DD informs us and goes to join them. I’m grateful we live in a neighborhood where kids can travel in packs among the houses.
Anonymous says
Possibly my post got eaten but OP, lucked out to live in a neighborhood with tons of kids near parks, also a super orthodox Jewish neighborhood so lots of kids are hanging out every Saturday and available to play outside.
NLD in NYC says
Nice, it’s good to hear that kids are still going out to for unscheduled play.
Anon. says
Small Midwestern city. I also routinely have kids knocking on the backdoor asking to borrow a cup of sugar or whatnot. It’s the best. I grew up on a farm and never got this experience as a child because we were miles from other kids.
anon says
So much of this is luck, I think. We’ve lived in the same house for 11 years, in a very kid-oriented neighborhood. Older kid got unlucky; all the nearby kids his age happened to be girls who were only interested in hanging out with other girls. (Frankly, I don’t think their parents have the imagination for boy-girl friendships past, like, age 4.) It has gotten better in middle school as kids are better able to manage biking across the neighborhood. My younger kid got lucky; her BFF lives next door and several other good friends live within a block or two.
Anon says
OT but it’s weird to me how soon the boy girl divide starts! Most of my 4 year old (girl)’s close friends are boys, and some of my close friends are so weirdly pearl-clutchy about it. One of them even suggested she might be tr*ns because she likes superheros and plays mostly with boys. So so annoying to me.
anon says
WTAF. That is insane.
Anon says
I have a trans kid. We knew my kid was trans bc they referred to themselves as the opposite gender.
Spirograph says
My neighborhood! close-in MoCo
I keep the main floor of the house tidy-ish, especially if I’m wfh because the mess bothers me when I’m walking to the kitchen or bathroom. When friends come over, though, the kids play in the basement family room or in the kid’s bedroom, and all bets are off whether those are neat and/or clean. Neighborhood kids see the mess. I figure kids don’t judge these things, and literally it is just the kid coming over without a parent, so I don’t worry about it.
Seafinch says
Same. We have neighbourhood kids wandering in and out constantly. My house is very tidy and usually has nothing out place on the main floor or second floor. No dishes that won’t be washed in the next half hour, no discarded clothes or toys anywhere. The basement playroom, however gets gutted every few weeks but in between looks like a bomb went off.
Anonymous says
I don’t like having anyone of any age over if the house is untidy or filthy. When I was a kid I always felt uncomfortable and unwelcome in messy houses and more at ease in neat, clean ones. I use playdates as motivation to get my sloppy kid to clean up. Not everyone feels this way, though, and plenty of my kid’s friends’ parents don’t clean up for visiting kids.
Anonymous says
OP- yes, same, I’ve always cleaned up for play dates but now it’s more random neighbor kid is over unscheduled. So new for us!
Anon says
Yeah, we don’t have random kids dropping by (yet) but we do have near weekly playdates with daycare friends, and I make my daughter clean up before the play date. She loves play dates so it’s good motivation for her to clean.
anon says
I have drop zones. Clothes and toys have a spot at the bottom of the stairs where I pile them until they are carried up on my next trip. Laundry baskets are only placed in the master bedroom or laundry room. Dishes at least go to the sink, if not the dishwasher. There are still papers on the counter and kitchen table, but the mess is largely controlled. It’s not perfect, but normally not embarrassing.
AwayEmily says
We tidy every night before bed so it’s never a total disaster but the exact type of mess you described (pajamas on couch, whatever morning toys they played with on the floor, breakfast dishes strewn) is what our house always looks like in the afternoons. And we are fine with having other kids over in that condition. And when my kid goes to other houses in the neighborhood, their houses are similarly messy. If I’m having adults over for drinks/dinner I will clean more but I feel like the standard is different for (1) kids and (2) random drop-ins. At least this is true in our non-fancy neighborhood, which is pretty much all kind of scrappy houses with two parents working.
Anon. says
This exactly. We pick up / tidy every night before bed so it’s generally mostly put together but piles happen. I don’t stress about those small piles for the neighbor kids that randomly end up at our house. Our neighbors are awesome and from my perspective living in my little utopian neighborhood that allows for random kids running around in yards and houses is the best thing ever and I don’t want to do anything to inhibit it like massively stressing about the mess before they come or the mess left behind when they leave.
Anon says
I live in a similar neighborhood with kids popping by, and live by a “same day mess is okay” rule. This morning’s breakfast dishes are okay but dinner from two days ago is not. Pajamas on the floor is okay, laundry from three days ago should be shoved in a closet.
In practice, that means we do a quick cleanup at night before bed because that feels less rushed than the mornings. My husband or I work from home about 3 days a week, so we also use our breaks at home to do a load of laundry, do a quick vacuum, or pick up a mess. The house isn’t spotless by any means, and we still have hairballs under the couch, but it’s good enough for impromptu kid visits.
K. says
Wondering the exact same thing because that is where we are at too! Leaning toward needing to do better with cleanup, but not putting myself up to a standard of perfection. FWIW a lot of the moms in my neighborhood are SAHMs or have grandparents that live in to help or have house cleaners. None of which we have and it makes me feel like I probably have the messy house, which I’m trying to avoid. But all the reasons I have for that have probably more to do with me than them.
And yes our Midwest neighborhood is magical for sure. It’s not even typical in our town….we just really lucked out on our block. The kids just play together all the time!
Anon says
Personally I think it’s pretty hard to keep your house neat/clean as a SAHM – the kids are home too much! (Unless they are in school and activities all the time.) I am a SAHM and my toddler and two other young kids make so many messes and require so much supervision/interaction that I get a bare minimum of chores done each day. I guess it’s a challenge for us all!
anon says
It’s like brushing your teeth while chewing Oreos! Keeping up with everything is just really hard during certain stages.
K. says
Probably too late for anyone to see this, but I completely agree if you are a stay-at-home mom and kids are not yet school-age–it is basically impossible to keep clean! My neighbors all have school-age kids, so it’s different. And I am sorry if I came across as judgemental–it wasn’t my intention and I appreciate your kind response. I definitely think being a stay-at-home parent definitely has its own challenges!
Anon says
Nope. My house is a walking disaster zone despite once a week housecleaners and that’s the stage of life we’re in and if you want to judge me for that then we don’t need to be friends. Also DD is 5, so I doubt the kindergarteners go home and gossip about the state of our house, and adults rarely make it past the front porch for unplanned visits, assuming they are not just waving from the street while the kid knocks on the door. For planned playdates or social events I tidy but it’s more practical, so there isn’t a tripping hazard, seats are clear for people to sit and tables are cleared for people to eat. I do wipe down the bathroom before adults come over but that’s because I am a stickler about bathrooms generally.
Anonymous says
This x1000. I struggle with control but I’ve learned to be at peace with the mess right now. If you’re not there yet that’s ok, but honestly you’re probably not going to be good for me so we’ll remain acquaintances and your kid probably won’t get invited over because I don’t want to make you or me or your kid uncomfortable.
DLC says
My house is constantly messy and I’m fine with that for impromptu play dates/ visits. It’s not like hoarders or anything, just books and papers and backpacks and amazon boxes constantly scattered. We have biweekly cleaners so it’s not dirty or grimy or anything.
We also are pretty strict that kids are not allowed in bedrooms or the basement (Husband’s man cave/ work room/ Laundry room). They stay in the playroom, dining room, living room or go outside.
Anon says
You might be my neighbor :) My house is generally very, very neat because I have a lot of anxiety around messiness in general. I do not clean up for kids (and certainly not the neighborhood hoard of 2nd grade boys that run around our neighborhood) – I clean up for my own mental health!
Anonymous says
I’m a slob but I forced myself to change. Dishes at least go in the sink. Laundry doesn’t live in main spaces. And kids get dressed in their bedrooms.
One of my friends is super messy and kids ask questions like “why does your house smell” and she laughs it off but that would destroy me.
Anonymous says
Eh, if you had my kids trying to make them get dressed in their rooms is not worth it. Kids are high sleep needs, can’t get them up any earlier, tend to have sensory issues and this is what works best. I try to tidy up during the work day or at 5 pm.
Anonymous says
Ok! But I don’t have your kids and I’m sharing my experience not saying eveyone has to do this. I don’t want to be known as the messy mom. And that’s one way to do it.
anon says
It must be pretty bad if kids are noticing and asking that question!
EDAnon says
Sometimes my dishwasher smells and we clean it when that happens, but I had a kid comment on the smell. I laughed but was embarrassed and cleaned it that day. But it isn’t the whole house – just when the dishwasher has some build up and gets hot.
anon says
I keep my house straightened up because clutter makes me deeply anxious, but I guess the side effect is that it’s generally tidy enough for other people to see it? If I were you, I’d focus on the dishes and the pajamas, as those things will have the biggest impact. IDK that kids are going to care about laundry baskets in the hallway.
anonM says
This is a really interesting question, and clearly hit a lot of nerves. DH and I both grew up in fairly messy homes and I avoided inviting friends over because the “clean up before friends come over” part was stressful in my house. So, DH and I both try to keep things pretty clean. Even then, I don’t think of some PJs on the floor or a few dishes as “dirty” and wouldn’t be worried about someone seeing that. As a kid, homes that were perfectly organized made me feel like I couldn’t touch anything and made me nervous. But, places that were truly dirty (think pet messes), were always out of soap/TP, or so jam-packed it wasn’t comfortable physically also were hard. If you just have some basic kids-live-here clutter and a few dishes, don’t worry! If you are warm and welcoming and let the kids have water and snacks they’ll love your house.
anon says
YES, this is a really good way to think about it. There is a difference between stuffed, dirty, and not having basic items out like soap, and just regular messes that come along with family life.
K. says
Wondering the exact same thing because that is where we are at too! Leaning toward needing to do better with cleanup, but not putting myself up to a standard of perfection. FWIW a lot of the moms in my neighborhood are SAHMs or have grandparents that live in to help or have house cleaners. None of which we have and it makes me feel like I probably have the messy house, which I’m trying to avoid. But all the reasons I have for that have probably more to do with me than them.
And yes our Midwest neighborhood is magical for sure. It’s not even typical in our town….we just really lucked out on our block. The kids just play together all the time!
K. says
Nesting fail, obviously! I cannot even keep those organized. Lol.
Anonymous says
Where do you keep your myriad stuffed animals? They have to be put “up” so my dog doesn’t mistake them for his, but half of them are my twins’ and they can’t just go in their cribs. Do I go 90s and get the little corner hammock?
Anon says
Ours live in plastic buckets or, more recently, as a 12 foot deep “carpet” in her small play tent in her room. I just keep tossing them back in there when I straighten at night and I actually like the new approach she created.
Anon says
Correction 1-2 foot. Play tent is only 3 feet tall
Anonymous says
This. play tent houses the zoo
Anonymous says
I have shelves.
Anon says
Our dog is not allowed in our child’s room (child’s preference) and she knows that keeping things in her room is the only way to guarantee the dog doesn’t touch her stuff. But also our dog, despite being pretty dumb in general, has never confused a kid’s toy for a dog toy.
But I like the corner hammock! Had one in my room growing up :)
anon says
I loved my corner hammock and have seriously considered doing that for my daughter’s very large collection.
Cb says
We have a corner hammock, it’s great!
avocado says
New parenting milestone: the first time you let your teenager ride with a teen driver. This is even scarier than the first time she got behind the wheel with her newly minted learner’s permit. They are only going 2 miles on very easy roads so why am I so nervous? And I only met this kid’s parents once for two minutes when they were 10.
When I was a teenager I thought my mother was overly cautious. Now I see that she was actually quite brave about some things she let me do.
Anon says
My parents weren’t super strict in general but they were very strict about this. I was never allowed to ride with other teens in high school, and was only allowed to drive one other teen at a time. At the time it annoyed me but in hindsight it makes sense to me. (And they did provide me with a car of my own and money for gas, etc. so it’s not like I couldn’t hang out with friends.)
avocado says
My mom wouldn’t let me fly by myself even at age 16, but she would let me ride in a car with 5 other teens in the middle of the night. Looking back I think she had it backwards.
Anon says
Yeah, that does seem backwards. I flew alone at age 12 I think. Although these days airlines don’t allow children to travel alone until 15 so it doesn’t really matter what parents are comfortable with.
Anon says
Are you serious?? 15? That’s crazy. I did not know this. How infantilizing.
Anon says
I think it might just be United? I’m not sure every airline has the same minimum age. But yeah it’s annoying to me! Especially because I have direct flights to my best friend and would probably feel comfortable putting my kid on a plane to her sometime around age 10-12. A layover is significantly more complicated and presents the risk of getting stranded in a strange city with no way to check into a hotel, since you have to be 18 for that. But I really don’t see what could go wrong on a direct flight with a trusted loved one on each end.
Anon says
Nah, it’s definitely not 15, at least not on all airlines. A friend is a flight attendant for a major airline and it’s 5 on her airline. It drives her nuts because she ends up being responsible for terrified kindergartners being sent cross country alone but she says by 7-8 they can mostly handle it.
Anon says
Oh I’m talking about flying alone without flight attendant supervision. Definitely much younger children can fly if you pay a flight attendant to watch the kid, but that is very infantilizing for a teen or even a preteen. But I think you are right that the minimum age to fly alone varies by airline. Looks like it’s age 12 on Southwest.
Anon says
I mean there’s an extra fee but it’s not like the flight attendant is a babysitter? The kid is alone for most of the flight. I’m sure it does rankle plenty of preteens though.
Anon says
It’s very much like a babysitter. The kid can’t move from their seat without a flight attendant escort. I give my 4 year old more freedom on planes and airports than kids have when flying with a flight attendant. It’s ridiculous to not allow 12-14 year olds to fly alone on direct flights.
Anon says
They’re usually in the back row right next to the bathrooms and the FA stops by a couple of times to check on them. This just seems like such a weird thing to be concerned about. It’s not like anyone is getting up to wander around on planes these days. The fasten seatbelt sign is on 90% of the time anyway and they’re packed like sardines. I wouldn’t think a 13-year-old would need it anyway but it certainly wouldn’t stop me from sending a kid on a trip.
Anon says
It wouldn’t stop me from sending a kid on a trip they wanted to go on. I just think it’s annoying and another example of how our society is smothering children and not giving them age-appropriate autonomy, which is bad for kids (in general, obviously this one specific example isn’t doing a huge amount of harm). But I tend to be a very free range parent.
Anon says
Avocado – it’s a huge milestone! I don’t get the cavalier attitude people still have sometimes about teen drivers. Like “oh I can’t wait until they drive themselves!”. I know easy for me to say as I have small kids, but…I dunno. I was reading Lagliv and in she mentioned her son just getting in and out of classmates cars (and she did not know them) and it seemed very…1990s. I am ALL for the rules that they can drive with restrictions/very limited as you mentioned.
A few weeks after I turned 16, I was driving – music up (I can still remember the song and won’t listen to it in a car) car was packed with friends, way further away than my parents thought I was. I had on platform heels, wasn’t paying attention, and rear-ended a car while trying to do a u-turn on red. I’m so lucky no one was hurt. I still won’t drive in heels to this day. My car was totaled.
Anon says
I used to drive in figure skates as a teen. We had 6 am practices and everyone including me would put their skates on while driving there to get 2 minutes more of sleep. Teenagers, man.
Anon says
Lol Lag Liv’s entire life seems very 90s to me. I mean not necessarily in a bad way. Just I don’t know anyone whose family life is that aggressively traditional outside her blog.