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When we first received a similar tablet as a gift, I wasn’t sure what a six-year-old would need a tablet for. Now, I’m a believer — it has saved us from many a meltdown.
My daughter can write and draw anywhere, anytime — no paper, pencils, crayons, or markers needed. For parents, it’s blissfully mess-free, portable, and durable. According to Bravokids, the battery lasts about six months. (I don’t think we’ve replaced ours yet, and it’s definitely been more than six months.)
It’s perfect for keeping kids occupied in restaurants or on the go. And, when you get home, there isn’t a stack of art to add to the fridge.
The tablet starts at $21.99 depending on the color and whether it’s monochrome or not.
Sales of note for 3.28.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything plus extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off 2+ items; 40% off 1
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles
- Lands’ End – 10% off your order
- Loft – 50% off everything
- Nordstrom: Give $150 in gift cards, earn a $25 promo card (ends 3/31)
- Talbots – 40% off 1 item; 25% off everything else
- Zappos – 37,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 50% off entire site
- Hanna Andersson – 30% off all swim; up to 30% off HannaJams
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; 50% off select swim; 50% off kids’ styles
- Old Navy – 50% off Easter deals
- Target – 20% off Easter styles for all; up to 30% off kitchen & dining; BOGO 50% off shoes & slippers for the family;
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
AwayEmily says
Anyone have a recommendation for YouTube (or other online) prenatal yoga? Now in my third trimester and feeling increasingly creaky/sore. I tried one last night, but it was very focused on “preparing for birth” (e.g. “this will help you open up your pelvis for the baby! this will help you breathe through contractions!”). I’d prefer one that’s just about making me feel less terrible.
AnonATL says
I liked prenatal yoga with Riki Jones. She’s the first hit when I search youtube, and her videos are also on Prime.
GCA says
I remember liking Aaptiv’s maternity program (strength, a little cardio, lots of modifications available) at the time (er…3.5 years ago!) as well as some of their non-prenatal yoga. It’s a paid app though, not unlike the Peloton app. Or you could try some of the lower-intensity regular Yoga with Adriene videos and modify the moves if things are uncomfortable.
Anonymous says
If you like Yoga with Adriene, she has a couple of videos that explain how to modify any of her practices for pregnancy. That would enable you to choose a practice that focuses on your particular trouble spot (hips, shoulders, etc.).
Anon says
The best ones I’ve found were the prenatal yoga videos by Alo Yoga. They’re more like a vinyasa yoga practice vs laying on the floor stretching with no warm up. I also really like BarreAmped prenatal barre videos.
Anonymous says
Seconding Alo Yoga. There is a half-hour one that I did a lot with my first pregnancy and am hoping to get back to soon :)
Peloton says
I was devoted to Yoga with Adriene pre-pregnancy, but I wasn’t a fan of her pre-natal content. The videos from Peloton are really good (for postpartum too)
Anon says
I highly recommend all of the prenatal yoga through Down Under (which is Boston-based, but all programming is now online as well).
Anon says
I liked Sia Cooper’s Prenatal Crossfit Kettlebell workout. She has some yoga, too.
Yes, you asked for yoga, not freaking kettlebells. But I swear, it will make you feel better.
GCA says
A writing tablet is great and all, but you can’t fold paper airplanes with it after you’re done writing, which seems to be the primary use for my first-grader’s worksheets. My house has more planes in development than Skunk Works ;)
anon says
My kids absolutely love this tablet. They use it for everything from taking orders when playing restaurant to playing hangman in the car. We also use it to practice spelling words, which my 3rd grader finds a million times more interesting on the tablet vs regular paper.
Spirograph says
ooooh, great idea. My 3rd grader is a terrible speller and hates practicing, so maybe this is worth a try. (Realistically, my daughter will probably commandeer it and use it for art, but either way it won’t go unused)
anon says
The post has a $20 price tag, but I think we found a version on Amazon for about $13.
GCA says
Funny how that works! My kid will practice spelling in a Word doc on my laptop but not on regular paper. It’s definitely the novelty factor. Wait till you’re staring down 40-page papers in college, kid.
Anonymous says
I use a tablet like this for scratch work when helping with math.
anon says
We have something like this and it has been GOLDEN for getting our 7-year-old through her older brother’s holiday concerts and church services.
sg says
Co-sign – Also loved by our 4 year old learning to write
Pogo says
ohhh good call on Church!!! I’m always so paranoid w/ markers and crayons.
Anon says
I feel like this might entertain my art-obsessed 4 year old for a long time.
anon says
My 6 year old is very picky eater and it’s turning into not really eating very much at all. She’s naturally thin like her father, and she has her annual check up next week so we’ll see how her growth chart is, but I am getting really concerned about how little she eats. She came home from school yesterday and looked very pale. I realized she had eaten a bit of the rice we gave her and a small chocolate from her advent calendar, and that’s it. She did eat a really good dinner that night. I’m not so worried about her weight as much as I am about her getting the right nutrition. She doesn’t like cheese, except on pizza, and we are mostly vegetarian so she doesn’t eat meat–we’ve offered but she won’t try it. She does like beans, chickpeas, tofu, peanut butter but those are in constant rotation and I think she’s just getting sick of them. I know the whole, kids will eat when they’re hungry thing, but I just don’t believe that she can go a whole day at school and only feel hungry enough to eat a cup of rice. She’s very active. I don’t know, I’m just worried. Any thoughts appreciated. Also–how do I bring this up with her doctor without making her feel like there’s something wrong with her? I don’t want to make her feel bad about it. She has a very healthy body outlook.
Anon says
Have you looked at all into high calorie breakfast shakes or something similar? I have the same struggle with my 7-year-old; he’s at the 13 percentile for weight and I have a hard time finding pants that won’t fall off of him. Only 20 lbs separate him from his much more robust sister – and she’s only 18 months old. The breakfast shakes are super expensive (and loaded with sugar) but they at least have some calories.
Anonymous says
Does she have any interest in cooking? Is she otherwise naturally stubborn/”spiritied”?
One of my kids is extremely spirited and also stubborn. She ate cucumbers and bread with butter for the entirety of preschool. We dreaded kindergarten beacause she cannot live on those foods alone. She was in the 20%tile and was like a ragdoll to pick up (i have other kids, they are NOT like this!). Every meal was a fight.
We are about 4 months into Kindergarten and the most amazing things have happened. 1) she got extremely muscular/strong 2) she started packing her own lunches and helping me grocery shop 3) she has started to dabble in trying school lunches. And she likes them! She gets a full lunch in her bag each day (most often she helps pack it, or puts an “order” in before bed) but will often also buy the school lunch and choose to eat that instead.
She has gone from “never in a million years” to “peanut butter is my favorite food!” (evidenced by the fact that she ate all the reeses at halloween and now DH’s favorite PB filled pretzels are a her snack ;)). I did nothing except let her try different halloween candies, and then suggest if she mixed nutella and peanut butter it might taste like a reeses.
She absolutely has very strong preferences around food (will not eat chicken pot pie, would eat cheese burgers every day as long as they have american cheese and are cooked by dad, not mcdonalds), but her net of acceptable foods has widened dramatically. She used to not eat fast food at all, but recently started liking crispy chicken sandwiches. Fair warning that while she likes to cook, she will often cook something for family dinner and then opt into eating plain noodles because she didn’t like it after all even though it sounded good. So keep trying! Things may change for you!
Anonymous says
Can you give the doctor’s office a call ahead of time to flag it for them before the appointment, and let them know that you want to discuss it in a sensitive way? It might be easier for the doctor to be the one to bring it up. At least my ped’s office encourages calling or sending a message before appointments if we have any questions we want to discuss at the appointment – they understand it can be difficult to remember everything while also trying to wrangle a kid (but my kid is much younger and therefore needs quite a bit of wrangling at appointments).
Anonymous says
How about big smoothies with peanut butter and avocado added for calories, fat, and fiber? There are so many flavor combinations available that it seems like you’d be more likely than not to find one that works. I also think you can have productive conversations with her about “needing to keep our bodies strong, especially when you’re in school all day requiring energy to learn” and “get lots of vitamins from our dinners” without introducing any weird or shameful body talk.
Anonymous says
Ask the doctor to step outside the room for a minute.
TheElms says
The Instagram account kids.eat.in.color has lots of good ideas for picky eaters and ways to up calorie intake. The mom (registered dietician) who runs the blog has 2 boys and one is picky and struggles to eat enough. She has good practical suggestions that might give you some ideas.
Anon says
+1. Check out her Better Bites program. Also take a look at the shake she used for her son – instead of doing pediasure or whatever it was, she did a milk + banana + PB one that is more cost effective and basically the same nutrition-wise without all of the added sugar.
Pogo says
I really like this insta – it’s very practical. I bought Real Easy Weekdays, and the bake-ahead freezer stuff is super helpful.
Also, just keep offering. You never know when tastes will change. My kid goes back and forth on various things he likes. Also try in different formats – like string cheese vs shredded, or yogurt pouch vs in a bowl, and keep switching it up. Sometimes my kid will boycott one format and love the other (and it changes!).
I think I’ve talked about this before but I was EXTREMELY picky and survived mostly on cereal from what I can remember. I really didn’t develop ‘normal’ tastes/range of food until college, and even then it took me awhile before I started eating things like sandwiches.
Spirograph says
My daughter is the same age and similarly picky (although she does like cheese) and doesn’t eat much. She regularly brings most of her lunch home, and sometimes doesn’t even eat much dinner either if we’re not having something she likes. We do multivitamins as a backstop, and I plan something I *know* she’ll eat for dinner every couple days, but otherwise I’m leaving it alone. She’s a healthy weight, happy, and has plenty of energy, she just seems to have different food needs.
For the doctor, though… Our pediatrician has an online portal where we can submit questions ahead of appts. I’d use that if it’s available and note that you’d rather not talk about it in front of your daughter unless she brings it up. If you can’t do that, just call the office and ask them to leave a note in the file.
School-age well visits typically include the doctor asking the child about what she typically eats for meals, what her favorite foods are, etc. Resist the urge to jump in and answer any of these questions! See what she says, and see how the ped reacts to her answers.
Anonymous says
My advice is to be very skeptical of any “nutritionist” that the doctor refers you to. Our experience with more than one nutritionist is that they do not understand anything about picky eaters. Their advice is mostly generic and geared either towards kids who are overweight or kids who need to gain weight for medical reasons but are not picky eaters. They will tell you to feed your kid a variety of foods, let your kid help prepare meals, etc., which works with normal kids but is entirely ineffective with picky eaters. They will also advise you to give your kid sugar-laden, highly processed drinks like Boost or Instant Breakfast that your child will probably reject because they are gross, or will only further reinforce your child’s preference for smooth, sweet foods and refusal of other foods. For truly problematic pickiness, I would inquire about a referral to a feeding disorders clinic. They are equipped to deal with texture aversions, fear of swallowing, and other causes of extreme pickiness.
So Anon says
Can you reach out to your pediatrician ahead of time to have the conversation between adults before the appointment? That will give both you and the pediatrician an opportunity to discuss your concerns in a forthright manner and also decide what should be said to your child. I do this all the time via the online portal with my kids’ pediatrician.
Aside from communicating with your pediatrician, here are a few additional thoughts based on my experience (my son and I saw a registered dietitian for years and he has Crohn’s and Celiac’s): I’ve always heard the advice to look at what your child eats over the course of a day versus at a single meal. Does your child struggle with recognizing that she is hungry? My son had a really tough time recognizing his body’s early cues that he needed to eat, and he would ignore until he was outright hangry and I stepped in. Is your daughter distracted at mealtimes (like in the cafeteria)? My son is a slow eater, and for a year or two he would go to the nurse to get an extra snack during the school day so that we could guarantee a minimum level of calories. If there are no other issues going on, then it may just be developmental. Have her get involved in cooking. I go with the approach of “I decide what goes on the plate, and you decide what to eat.” There is always something they like on the plate.
Anonymous says
Yes, the whole “kids will eat when they’re hungry” thing only works for kids who can recognize their hunger. My kid doesn’t, and if she goes too long without eating she will actually feel sick when she tries to eat.
anon says
This is true for my 8 yo. I can count on one hand the number of times she’s said she’s hungry, but we have horribly awful hangry episodes almost every day.
We work hard to make sure she eats on a regular schedule and are working with her to help her understand that she needs to eat something healthy at each meal, even if she doesn’t “feel” hungry. Without hunger cues, she will fast until she has the option to eat something that she loves (e.g., cake, ice cream, candy) and reject all other food, even if its food she objectively likes but considers inferior to dessert. In the past year she’s dropped from 50th percentile to sub-10th percentile for weight and height, so it’s a health issue in addition to an emotional regulation issue for her.
So Anon says
Yup! It has taken years (like from when he was 5 to last year, when he was 9) to begin to be able to recognize hunger cues. Honestly, although I am not one of those who try to see the good in the pandemic, it did give me the opportunity to observe his eating habits every day for months and intervene quickly. It was a lot of mindfulness work with him, and it is finally paying off. He is finally starting to say, “I don’t think we should talk about that until I eat” and “I may be hungry.”
Incidentally, I also realized that I struggle with the same thing from a different perspective. If I am trying to finish up a task, I will entirely ignore that I am starving and then will feel horrible later when I do eat. It really helped me to approach him with, “this is how I feel, and this is what works for me.”
Anon says
Off topic, but my 10-year-old was just diagnosed with Crohn’s last year… would love any advice from a parent who’s been at this longer than I have. She’s on remicade but it’s not well-controlled right now and we’re struggling (esp some lots of people swore remicade was basically a miracle drug).
So Anon says
Hey there! My son was diagnosed with Crohn’s when he was 5. He is 10 now. First, I want to tell you that you are doing great. I know that the road to get to the diagnosis is not easy, and parts for me were truly scary. I look back at the photos of my son at that time, and I can see so much of what was going on. He had dropped under 3% for BMI and had stopped putting on any height. It took us a while to get the Chron’s into remission, and then it took a long time for him to catch up on height and weight.
My biggest advice is to find a physician that gets you and your family and that you trust. Do not hesitate to seek out a second opinion if something feels even slightly off. I kick myself now because we saw a pediatric GI when my son was 3 who told us that the problem was that we were not doing a good enough job sticking to a gluten free diet (Celiac’s runs in the family too), and that if we were better at it, he wouldn’t be failing to thrive. I left the appointment and sobbed. It took another few years of me going back to our general pediatrician, whom I adore and trust immensely, for us to get a correct diagnosis. My son is on Pentasa, which is a local anti-inflammatory. It has worked well for him, but I know that it does not work for all. The other advice I have is to work with a registered dietitian – most likely one who works with your pediatric GI. Again, it should be someone you trust. Our registered dietitian became familiar with my son and our situation (single, working parent family) and proposed solutions that actually helped. My son also has sensory challenges, so we were a complex picture.
Finally – please do not see your child’s health struggles as a reflection of you as a parent. The flares are not your fault, and you will get this figured out. It may not happen tomorrow, but it will happen. I’m sending you all the internet hugs.
Anonymous says
Will she eat school lunch? I can’t believe it, but my extremely picky eater loves all the chicken entrees the school serves. Our pediatrician says she normally encourages parents to avoid school lunch because it’s so processed, but if our kid will eat it we should let her. So we do.
Mary Moo Cow says
I had similar concerns with my 6 year old, and my daughter sounds a lot like yours: mine doesn’t like cheese or meat, is active, and I sometimes worry she’s looking pale. I planned on bringing it up at our well visit, but ped beat me to it by asking DD to name a food for every color of the rainbow. I was surprised with what she came up with! Ped said that indicated to him she knows what healthy food is and from her answer and growth charts and appearance he wasn’t worried. He also repeated that kids eat when they are hungry and that our job is to offer food and their job is to eat it. It is easy to go down the internet rabbit hole of protein and eating the rainbow and feel like you are failing your kid. I think the more sane approach is to bring it up with the doctor, continue to offer foods they like and some new foods, and try to remember that kids grow and tastes change. I second what others have said about giving the ped a heads up that this is something you want to discuss and let them take the lead, and step in if necessary to clarify. You could also ask to schedule a follow-up phone call.
Anonymous says
I had our pediatrician help me at a 6 year well check with a conversation about the various types of foods our bodies need each day- energy foods (which my child doesn’t like to eat/not till dinner), protein, fat, vitamins/minerals. It went pretty well. We talk about needing to eat all of these groups every day to stay happy and healthy and keep growing.
Anonymous says
Editing to add — this is in the context of my child having low iron and mood issues related to not eating and fatigue. So we did have an issue we needed to address.
Anon says
I went through a very similar experience with my very slim son at around the same age. You got lots of good advice above, and only adding my experience to suggest you (1) focus on calorie filled meals first to jump start your kids’ appetite, and (2) make sure you are optimizing the meals when your kid is actually hungry.
My kids consume like 75% of their calories in the morning, and I try to shove them full of calories before 2PM. For instance, my extremely slim 7 year old recently went through a massive growth spurt, and during that time, I fed him a full breakfast, then a sandwich at 10AM, followed by another lunch around noon. My kids have also always sort of grazed through dinner, so I just try not to worry about it.
Also, I successfully got the same super skinny kid out of a very prolonged picky period by offering high calorie meals for a while, and putting nutrition on the shelf. He would also avoid food bc he tends towards pickiness, and over a period of months, it led to him just not feeling hungry at all — but definitely feeling the effect of not consuming enough food. The only thing that worked for us was to kind of “ignore” nutrition for a while and focus on calories. So we jump started his appetite by offering high caloric foods when he wanted to eat — toaster waffles with peanut butter and sausages and syrup every morning, PB and J on white bread, mac and cheese, chicken nuggets with honey etc. Not junk – just easy to eat kid meals that he was happy to eat that added a layer of protein where possible.
Jump starting his appetite made him WANT to eat again, and now, he is far more adventurous in what he wants to eat. But it took him regaining an appetite before we could start putting more nutritious foods back into his diet — and I really don’t think we would’ve had success if we focused on both nutrition and calories at the same time.
Anonymous says
Totally agree with this. Refusing to eat creates a negative feedback loop where their appetite dwindles to nothing. If you focus on appealing, high-calorie foods for a while, you can build their appetite back up and then try to introduce more balance. We do a lot of Kodiak Cakes pancakes and Justin’s waffles for added protein at breakfast, mac and cheese, quesadillas, sweet potatoes, and chicken in all forms when we are trying to get ours back into the habit of eating.
Anon says
Yes! Love Kodiak cakes! I also alluded to this above, but my other go-to is to offer a PB&J or Sunbutter and honey or melted cheese sandwich at typical snack times. Instead of getting chips or a granola bar, I give the kids a crust-free sandwich. I feel like our hunger related meltdowns diminished to almost nil after we swapped out snack items for more calorie heavy options.
Anon says
Consider ARFID? I’m strongly against the idea that “fed is fed” since I have suffered from some pretty serious nutritional deficiencies (more from GI conditions than from picky eating, but medical intervention changed my life). So I’m glad you’re thinking about nutrition! It matters. And sometimes it’s easy (heme iron is so painless compared to the iron they had when I was a preteen, for example).
The doctor may also run some screenings for comorbidities (cardiac, etc.) that is probably a good idea even if it’s unlikely anything is amiss.
Anon says
My son’s school requires that birthday treats are store-bought and individually packaged, and they must have an ingredient list on the individual package. I’m at a loss — any ideas for something in particular that would be good? All I’m coming up with is cruising the snack area at Costco and trying to find something there. I was hoping I could do individually wrapped decorated cookies from a local bakery if they put the ingredient list on each package, but that’s not a “store”.
Anonymous says
Ok so this is annoying but you’re making it hard for no reason. Yes. Buy a snack pack at a grocery store and call it a day. You’re literally being told to not be extra. Rice Krispie treats. Done.
Anonymous says
A lot of things not marketed for individual sale don’t always list the ingredients on the little snack pack packages though, just the outer box.
But I agree with the general sentiment – don’t be precious about this. Kids would probably be more excited by Little Debbie than something from a bakery.
Anon. says
In my experience, most of the big boxes of these types of snacks at Costco will be appropriately labeled.
Allergy parent here saying thank you for following these annoying rules.
Anon says
Rice Krispy Treats or Welch’s Fruit Snacks?
TheElms says
I don’t know how much lead time you have but you can do personalized Hershey’s bars and also Oreo’s. There are probably more options if you search, but I’ve gotten those as part of favors. I think they would work because I recall them being individually wrapped and having ingredients on the wrapper. Also, I think Cheryl’s cookies come individually wrapped.
EDAnon says
Everyone at our center does Oreos. To be different, we do little Debbie powdered donuts. Both are but free and can be individually packaged. They’re not healthy but it’s not every day.
Pogo says
Whole Foods has a section in the bakery that has school-safe treats, including in individual packages. That’s what I did for our birthday.
Anonymous says
I think Cheryl’s cookies fit the bill (order online).
Sharpie says
My son (almost 4) drew all over the walls, floor, and our sofa last night in sharpie. I spent more than an hour scrubbing this morning, on my day off. I am so frustrated, that is all.
So Anon says
Oh no!! That’s such a nightmare!
octagon says
My kid did that at 4, too (though marker, not sharpie). I handed him a magic eraser and worked on my computer in his room while he scrubbed it. It took something like 6 hours but he still remembers it years later.
DLC says
So much commiseration! My kids accidentally broke a snow globe last night that had been my husband’s since childhood. Husband and I are feeling like we just can’t have nice things anymore. Or at least not for the next ten years.
How do people have nice things, unstained furniture and clean walls with small children?
Anonymous says
They don’t. No one does.
EDAnon says
My kids have broken two beloved things (and I am not a things person so I don’t have a ton of beloved things). It sucks.
So Anon says
Beats me. I thought that my kids were old enough to have a not-completely-dark couch. They were 7 and 9 when I purchased it. I was wrong. At least I opted for slipcovers that can be washed.
No Face says
Do people have those things with small children? I don’t!
Anon says
I do, but I shampoo my furniture regularly with a Bissell Little Green. Clean walls are another story.
Anonymous says
You don’t. Even if, like me, you are the parent of a unicorn child who doesn’t produce much mess, their friends and/or your nieces and nephews will still wreck your house. Like my nephew who smuggled bubble gum into my house and ground it into my couch cushions and the seats of my car. Where did he even get bubble gum?!? Or you will successfully teach your child never ever to touch the walls, then get them a dog that insists on rubbing against the wall every time it goes out the back door. Sigh.
Anon says
Our nice things are locked away in cabinets with child safety locks that I struggle with as an adult (kiddos have figured out all others) and we have dark wood and leather that is easily wiped off or hard to see stains on.
The only thing that will save our walls is fresh paint though, and I am waiting until we are done with the little kid stage to repaint (and the prior owners put FLAT paint on all of the walls, except that one bathroom has eggshell. Nothing comes off). We even have several crayon masterpieces upstairs that I haven’t bothered to take a magic eraser to because at this point why bother. A friend told me I should just hang a frame around them and tack up a museum card noting the artist and date.
TheElms says
So much commiseration! We have flat paint as well and it is just a disaster. I know it looks fancy or something but its so impractical, even for adults.
Anon says
My kid did this too, around that age – he’d been sent to his room for something naughty I can’t even remember, and wrote “Iym Sorree” on the inside of his door with a Sharpie.
SBJ says
Just in case this tip helps anyone out-Sharpie comes off with rubbing alcohol (isopropyl alcohol). It can bleed on soft/porous surfaces when cleaned that way, but for hard surfaces it works like magic! Says someone who’s kids also Sharpie on things with some regularity…
Anonymous says
This has worked for me on carpets and fabrics too. The quicker you get it on the stain, the better.
Pogo says
ugh, I am so sorry. Not a physical thing, but we spent probably 100s of hours re-doing our landscaping last year, and since we finished, our 4yo has been systematically destroying it. I struggle because in his mind he’s playing – digs a giant hole in the mulch down to the groundcover and pours gravel in with his little dump truck because “it’s a construction site”. But it is so demoralizing to try and make your house/yard nice and it gets trashed pretty much all the time.
SOS says
Y’all. My 3.5 year old is out for blood. She is excessively whiny from sunrise to sunset. She won’t stay in her bed overnight. She’s obsessed with me and not DH right now which is making me extra insane (him too).
How do I handle the tantrums? Like full on, throws body on the floor sobbing when we do anything that she doesn’t want. We typically ignore and just stick to the expectation “it’s time to eat. no you cannot play outside [in 15 degree weather]” but sometimes that just escalates and when it’s bedtime, or worse 2 am, everyone ends up upset.
It is one thousand percent attention seeking. We do a lot of “when I count to three you can choose X or Y but those are your only choices”. That has more success than anything else. We validate big feelings. We redirect and distract. Time out doesn’t work. Sometimes we end up yelling, which I’m not proud of, but now we’re seeing her yell at us in the same way. Parental fail – monkey see, monkey do, clearly. Tell me this is just a phase or am I failing as a parent, because the latter seems way more likely these days.
BTW, ‘progress report’ from preschool claims she’s an adorable, calm natured, smart and responsible little girl. She’s (mostly) good for our nanny. It’s clearly a mom and dad thing.
Anon says
Check out @biglittlefeelings on instagram. Sounds like they would be a really great fit for ideas of how to handle the issues you’re having (favoritism, tantrums, bedtime).
Anonymous says
Yes this is what three year olds do. You’re a good mom!
AwayEmily says
NO idea if this will work because it seems likely it’s kid-dependent but lately when my 3.5yo start to melt down, I offer (with compassion) to pick him up and hold him for a few minutes. And I do this regardless of whether the meltdown is about something silly (e.g. he can’t find his favorite tiara) or more of a discipline-related issue (e.g. he’s refusing to put on his coat when he needs to). I say “You look like you need to go uppie for a minute” and, if he acquiesces, I pick him up. It doesn’t always work, but about 75% of the time he’s then able to regulate and calm down. He’s the type of kid who gets really locked into power struggles but also feels super ashamed when he does something wrong, so I think it helps to break him out of the cycle.
So Anon says
For what its worth – this still works with my 8 year old. She will get frustrated or upset. Like me, her upset and frustration comes out as anger. The minute I say, “You seem like you need a snuggle. Do you want to go sit on the couch and snuggle and tell me about it?” she melts.
Anonymous says
Yup. I have 3 and the one that melts down the most responds to this.
DH and I call it the “reset” that helps her get back in control. She’s 6 and it was a game changer when we discovered this approach at age 4.
Anon says
I don’t have great advice but my 3.75 year old is the same way. She’s started gathering her stuffed animals and telling them “you can do X or you can do Y but those are the ONLY OPTIONS!” because I guess she’s heard us say that quite a bit ;)
I know every kid and parent is different but age 3 has been the hardest, most exhausting and least fun age for me as a parent. Even the “terrible twos” were nothing compared to 3. People tell me it gets better at 4 but I’m not sure I believe them given how close we are to 4 and that things don’t really seem to be improving at all.
Anonymous says
The problem is every kid is different, so your worst moment may be different than theirs.
Anon says
Yeah I get that, and I definitely think she’s an unusually spirited preschooler. And she was a very good sleeper practically from birth, which made the infant and toddler years easier for us than they are for a lot of people. It’s all relative.
Anonymous says
This is almost certainly not because you are failing as a parent. You are doing the very best you can with the info you have. If you knew how to stop this behavior, you would, but you don’t so you have to just muddle through. Perhaps the answer will appear, but she will grow and change no matter what.
Also, I think it is pretty likely you didn’t introduce her to the concept of yelling. It really isn’t all your fault!
Pogo says
Same here, though it has improved at age 4 (we sometimes make it an entire day without a tantrum or massive refusal to participate in basic life functions) but at 3 it was constant. Two things:
1) read Raising Your Spirited Child. Even if your child is not spirited, understanding how to diffuse refusals or transitions was very helpful to me.
2) Hire a sleep trainer. At around 3, my son would only fall asleep with me laying down next to him and it took until 9:30 pm. I was a shell of a human (also had a newborn). He’s not perfect, but even on days like yesterday when he had a solid nap at school, I was able to let daddy do books and I grabbed dinner, and then tucked him in, and he let me leave his room around 8. A massive improvement from waking up groggy and confused in his bed at 11pm.
Throughout all, mine has also maintained excellent reports from preschool and nanny. I feel you.
Anon says
story of my life x 2 – i have twins! i think we need a support group for all of us in this situation. DH wasn’t home for bedtime last night, won’t be home tonight and is then traveling next week for work. on their 3rd bday i said to DH it was just getting easier, but now i take all of that back
Anon says
I’ve got a spirited one too! I have to make sure that I give her focused one-on-one time (just 5-10 minutes) a few times a day where we focus on what she wants to do, and that helps a lot. Often it’s just “mama snuggles” where she lays on top of me and continues doing what she was doing (playing with dolls, drawing, etc.). Extra long bath time (which she loves, we let her watch her tablet while she soaks) helps with evening meltdowns, or at least reduces the time for conflicts. Hang in there, it’s not your parenting, promise!
TheElms says
It is so hard. My 2.5 year old is trending this way. A few nights ago she tantrumed on the floor kicking and sobbing and yelling for 20 minutes because she wanted to keep playing and not eat dinner. She’s also the kind of child that doesn’t like to be touched or potentially even have anyone in the same room as her when she is upset (tricky in an open floor plan house). Nothing seems to work on her yet, we’ve tried Big Little Feeling to no avail. I haven’t read Raising Your Spirited Child, but maybe that’s next.
Anon says
My kid is like this (not wanting to be touched or talked to when she’s mad) and starting around 2.5 we would just put her in her room alone when she started tantruming. We felt a little guilty about ignoring her vs doing what all the books say to do but she would calm down fast that way, and we were always waiting right outside the door to offer hugs and comfort as soon as she got calm (so it was very different than a timeout where she had to be in there alone for X minutes). Now at 3.5 when she gets mad she will actually sometimes remove herself to her room to calm down and re-center herself, which I think is a good thing?
GCA says
You are doing great. This is 100% normal for three year olds and is absolutely no fault of yours, particularly as preschool and nanny both report good behavior. She feels safe enough with you to have those complete meltdowns.
I have one kid who is 3, and one who is 6.5. Kid 1 is the sweetest, calmest (though very high energy, short-sleeper) child — but even he, between age 3 and 4, had some huge feelings. Time out doesn’t really work for either kid, but what does seem to work is sort of ‘time in’ with one parent – we go to their room/ our room/ out on the porch, cuddle and talk through the meltdown. Another tactic is to try and catch the meltdown before it escalates.
Anon mom says
My 3 year old’s teachers told me he pushed another kid down today at preschool. This is new behavior for my kid. Should I text the other child’s mom to apologize (I don’t think he was hurt, but he did fall down and ask my child to stop)? Also, any tips on dealing with this type of behavior?
Anonymous says
I wouldn’t text the other mom. This is preschool. The other parents are mostly relieved that their kid wasn’t the one who did the pushing. Unless you and/or your child is an obnoxious bully, which is probably not the case if you’re worried about apologizing, you’re good.
Signed, parent of the kid who always got pushed
Anon says
My kid just gotten bitten for the fourth time by the same kid. The first couple of times, I was happy that it wasn’t my kid doing the biting… now that there’s a big mark on my kid’s face, I’m actually getting really upset.
Anon says
This is normal behavior for a 3 year old. I would not text the other mom.
Anon says
My kid was doing this a lot, but school didn’t tell us for way too long. What seems to have worked is kindly having him draw an apology card and come up with something to give his friend- he chose to make a fruit snack for her. But first time I wouldn’t worry. If it persists, HE does the apologizing/making amends.
Pogo says
I had extra vacation left so I’m taking today and next Friday off and doing all those glorious tasks like taking donations to Goodwill, cataloging kiddo’s artwork, and buying gifts for the church giving tree. It actually feels amazing. There’s a lot to be said for checking stuff off your to-do list. 10/10 recommend.
GCA says
I tried to do that this week – take some time off to decompress, rest, and run errands with childcare. It worked fine on Monday and I had lunch with friends. Then my preschooler was out Tuesday through Thursday morning for a cough (we had to wait for her Covid test to come back negative after her rapid at-home test came back negative; we did get through a lot of random drive-up errands and baking though), I got my booster shot Thursday and started feeling woozy, I picked up kid 1 after school to get his second vaccine dose, my boss called this morning to get input on an urgent proposal, and today preschool called at 2.30 to say they had to close the classroom for a Covid exposure…I nearly cried. I need a break from my break during which I couldn’t catch a break!
Anonymous says
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Anon says
It’s the Bravokids LCD Writing Tablet and available at A-zon and Walmart.
Realist says
If you click the picture of it, then it takes you to the product.