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Ooooh: I love the colors in this bright scarf, over at Lands’ End, of all places — the colors just look like they’d be flattering on every skin tone, don’t they? While you’re there check out their “On the Counter” section, where sales get more steeply discounted each day (I’ve gotten some crazy deals on water shoes, snow bibs, and swimming suits there), and also the brand’s popular (and washable) sheath dress. The scarf is $29. Lands’ End Hyper Medallion Tiled Scarf.
(L-4)
Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
quailison says
Picking up on the travel thread yesterday – I remember some of you raving about the Guava Lotus travel crib a while ago. For those of you who have it, can you tell me if it’s truly carry-on size? I don’t mind having to gate check for free if I end up with a tiny-overhead-bin plane but want to avoid extra bag fees…and not be “that person” trying to shove the oversized bag in.
CHJ says
A few weeks ago someone (Formerly Preg 3L, maybe?) mentioned that their baby gets the Thursday blues at daycare. My little guy had an epic meltdown at daycare drop off today. He is usually a little bit grumpy at drop off, but this was legendary. I can’t wait for the weekend to come so we can cuddle it out. Anyone else experience this on Thursdays? Are bad Thursdays a thing?
mascot says
I think bad days can be a thing. We generally do ok with school drop-off, but Saturday mornings are wild in our house. He’s much more likely to act out and run wild in those couple of hours than almost any other time in the week. He’s 4 so maybe he’s just happy to be free for the wknd.
anne-on says
Yuuup, Thursday nights are always meltdown central in our house. My son is usually tired from a nearly full week of daycare at that point and ready for the weekend. I try to plan for an easy ‘treat’ dinner that night, and either an early bedtime, or some extra downtime activities (cuddling, books, whatever). Oddly, Fridays seem to be no problem.
(former) preg 3L says
……..actually, I’m the one who has meltdown Thursdays. Baby usually does fine. *hangs head in shame*
Meg Murry says
No shame! Being a parent is hard, but you’re doing fine and hanging in there!
Anonymous says
Posting waaaay late here… but in case you are following comments — When we transitioned our little one from nanny to daycare, we still wanted him to get a little extra individual attention. We have a sitter that comes Thursday mornings and takes him to the library, the park or the children’s museum, then drops him a daycare for the afternoon. Something to consider if it fits in your budget?
Anon S says
Good morning ladies, I’m nearly 38 weeks pregnant and will be having a c section due to this little diva being in a breech position. I was just wondering if anyone had advice on preparing and recovering from a c section? Everything I’ve read so far and all the people I’ve talked to so far seem to be on the same page, but wanted to get opinions from you ladies as well. Thanks in advance!
KJ says
I had an emergency c section, so it’s not the same situation, but I would say make sure to set things up to minimize going up and down stairs. After my c section we had all the baby stuff on the main level, and I set up camp in our guest room (also on the main level) so I never had to use the stairs. Also, make sure you have a good, working thermometer at home. It’s important to know if you have a fever. (Not to scare you, but after I went home I got an infection, spiked a fever, and wound up back in the hospital for 5 more days. That was after an emergency c, though, and I think it is much less likely with a scheduled c.) After I was cleared to exercise, I started with the exercises listed here: http://laurenbrooks.laurenbrookstraining.com/2008/01/what-doctors-dont-tell-you-after-c.html. Despite my complications, I actually had a pretty easy recovery and was lifting weights 8 weeks post-partum. Now I’m a year out and feel like my core strength is pretty close to what it was pre-baby. Good luck!
Anon S says
Thank you for the info! Don’t worry about scaring me, I definitely want to know all possible outcomes. That’s amazing you were lifting 8 weeks pp.
What did you find to be the most comfortable clothes to wear?
KJ says
I wore my maternity yoga pants immediately after the birth. I lost the 30 pounds I had gained during pregnancy by 3 weeks post-partum (I think this was due to my infection – I do not recommend it as a weight loss plan), and then I just wore regular yoga pants and shorts with wide elastic waistbands.
KJ says
I realize that sounded kind of braggy, which I didn’t mean at all. (And for the record I gained some of that weight back.) I just included the information to make the point that your maternity pants might work only for a short amount of time (or longer – everyone is different), so have some smaller, but comfy options for when/if your maternity pants start falling down all the time.
blueridge29 says
One week out from my second c-section ( my babies were both breech). I brought large stretchy pajama pants to the hospital. It can be painful if your clothes hit the incision line so go for lose higher up pants/skirts. I also loved having slippers and a robe at the hospital so when you are up and moving around you feel like less of a patient. Lastly bring prunes or dates and eat them everyday. ..it will make life easier. :) Best of luck both of my c-sections were positive experiences and the recovery wasn’t too bad.
In House Lobbyist says
I had both emergency and planned C section and the planned one was so much better. Things were more orderly, thing were explained better, I didn’t throw up for hours afterwards and my incision was much better. And I felt better quicker with the planned one. I liked the granny panties that came up over my incision and wanted all my pants to come up over it as well. The incision itched but it was mostly numb for weeks. I did stairs both time and was fine with it but it was slow going and I couldn’t carry the baby since I was holding on to the rails myself. I used a stool to climb in and out of bed since our bed is high. Also you can’t use your abs to raise up so you need extra pillows and time getting up. I also found holding a pillow over my stomach when drove helped – but I had a 30 mile drive home and have a long, bumpy driveway. And emotionally I felt much better after the planned one. I hadn’t even considered the possibility of a c section the first time and it was emotionally hard that I didn’t get my “dream” birth story.
And since you know you will staying longer, see if you can request a larger room. My hospital had larger rooms that costs an extra $50 a day and was worth it. Or be nice and ask the nurses what’s the best room when they are taking you up.
Anon S says
Are there special c section granny panties, or just any regular high waisted granny panties will do the trick?
In House Lobbyist says
I used the regular Hanes ones that I was on by the end – a couple of sizes bigger.
Nonny says
The hospital has special panties that they will give you after the C-section. They were so soft and comfortable on the incision that I asked for a couple of new pairs before going home, and wore them for a week or two after leaving the hospital too.
Lyssa says
Congratulations and good luck. There’s really not a lot to worry about with a planned c-section; the best thing that you can do is just relax and not worry. As for preparation, bring clothing that will not be snug around your waist (I wore drawstring pj pants and maternity yoga pants in the hospital with no problem). The good thing is that you don’t have to worry so much about them having to look at your hoo-ha and bleeding (at least, this was my experience – the bleeding was no worse than a heavy period, while v-birth folks make it sound like a horror movie). Don’t eat or drink beforehand, and if they ask you to choose between being carried to your room or moving into a wheelchair, just let them carry you (I thought that I felt pretty good, but trying to get up with assistance made me feel very bad). Be really careful about eating or drinking soon after, too, even if you think that you feel up to it.
You’ll want to do things that will keep you occupied without needing a lot of brain power or moving around, so be ready to watch bad TV, read light things on a device, or read light books/magazines. If you get itchy after the surgery from the pain meds, ask for some Benedryl (sp?) in your IV – it will help you sleep, too. Have your partner stay as much as possible so that you have someone to help you up when needed and get things for you.
anne-on says
Second the suggestion for Benadryl. I had an emergency c and the morphine made me both super itchy and also a bit nauseous. I asked for an anti-emetic and benadryl and felt much better.
CPA Lady says
I had a breech baby and planned C-section. The recovery was overall very easy.
Things to do:
Take the pain medicine. And don’t wait until you hurt a lot to take it. You’ve had surgery, this is not a time to be a martyr. I found myself much better equipped to handle the challenges of caring for a newborn and learning to nurse when I wasn’t in pain. I only took it for about a week, but that was long enough.
Once you can get up and walk, do it. You can request an abdominal binder from the hospital. Wear that when walking. It helps a lot.
Other things to be aware of:
You might shake after the surgery. This is totally normal and should go away after a few hours.
There might be a lot of people in the OR. I had no idea what to expect, but there were 12 various doctors/nurses/etc. in there when I had my c.
My arms hurt so badly by the time I got out of the hospital, because I couldn’t use my ab muscles to help me move around, so I had to push myself up in bed, etc with my arms. Anything that will help your arms (a nursing pillow, etc) will be a godsend.
I was also surprised by how tired I would get for the few weeks after the surgery. Going grocery shopping by myself was not something that could happen. I could go to the store and buy 3 or 4 things, but that was my limit. — You will feel better soon, don’t overdo it, or you will hurt yourself.
Good luck and congrats!
Take 3 says
Yes to all of this!!
But, just to provide another perspective, don’t be afraid to stop taking narcotics if they are hurting more than helping you! With my first, I took narcotic pain meds post surgery, and was totally unable to sleep/hallucinated/and was irrationally weepy. I kept attributing the reactions to “hormones” only, but my mental health skyrocketed after I stopped taking the narcotics. Unfortunately, that first 7-10 day period made adjusting to motherhood and nursing harder than it probably needed to be, and shook my confidence a lot.
With my second, I asked to not have any narcotics, and though definitely more sore, my mental health was not even in the same ballpark. I also was able to get up and walking sooner, and I think that helped my recovery. Yes, it could have been PPD with my first, but I wish I would have considered tweaking the meds before chalking up all the sadness/crying to hormones only. Especially if you have a history of strong reactions to meds, take this into consideration as you prepare a post-partum plan. Also, the almost immediate improvement after not taking the meds was pretty telling.
Otherwise, my two sections were magical, wonderful and special. Would not change a thing.
Anon says
Definitely second this advice. Very important to take pain meds to manage your pain, but be aware of potential side effects for narcotic pain meds. After my first c section I felt queasy, and they recommended I add zofran on top of the Vicodin. Result was me puking in the car on the way home from the hospital … Not a great way to go home with a new baby.
This time around I am on ultram, Tylenol and Motrin and feeling much better. Different things work for different people.
Meg Murry says
Didn’t have a c-section, but similar meds advice. Take your meds on schedule – if they say every 4-6 hours, then take them at 6 hours max, don’t wait until you are in pain at 7 or 8 hours becuase they will take a while to work. Also, listen to what the nurses are asking you -when they say “how are you doing?” that is partially code for “do you need more meds?” For whatever reason when I was in the hospital they had switched from automatically offering more meds after you could have more to waiting for you to ask for them – my husband figured this out, and started asking every time a nurse came in “how long has it been since she had pain meds? Should she have more?” after having to go track someone down in the hallway in the middle of the night to get meds when the previous dose had worn off and the nurse rounding on me hadn’t offered more an hour before because she either didn’t pay attention or because I wasn’t complaining of pain.
And have some easy to eat food to eat with your meds, especially when/if you switch to ibuprofen. I did a number on my stomach after kid#1 taking ibuprofen on an empty stomach, and it took months to resolve the almost-ulcer I gave myself. For kid#2 I had a stack of peanut butter sandwiches in ziplocs in the fridge so at a minimum I could have half/quarter sandwich with my meds and it made all the difference.
buckeyeesq says
This will sound strange, but I ordered some of the high-waist underwear from Victoria’s Secret (I think one of them was the lace waist brief p@nty) and it made me feel much more normal to be wearing pretty underpants and they still didn’t hit my scar. I do recommend dark colors.
I would also ask for the generic gas-x pill–simethicone maybe? It made me feel a lot better following my c-section, and when I forgot to ask for it at one point, I could tell the difference.
Finally, I would say don’t let the internet scare you. Based on my experience and that of my friends, responses can really vary. I went to the grocery store the day I came home from the hospital (babies were born Saturday morning, we came home on Wednesday) and was doing stairs the day after we got home. My friend couldn’t drive for almost a month because she was in so much pain. You don’t know what will happen until it does, and whatever it is, you’ll deal with it.
Merabella says
I am at 38 weeks today, and I was wondering what clothes I should have for those first few weeks postpartum. I’ll be at home, maybe venturing out of the house occasionally. I live in the South, so weather will be warm/humid. I realized I don’t have a lot of lounge clothes since I spend most of my time at work – so I guess I’m just wondering what pieces I should have to get me through…
Anon S says
Happy 38 weeks to you! I will be 38 weeks on Sunday. :) I’ve heard that post partum, you’ll be around the same size as you were 5-6 months pregnant. I’m in the same boat as you though in that most of my maternity clothes have been work clothes, so the other day I went to target to get a few casual maternity tops and lounge pants. I’ve also purchased several nursing pajamas and tops (hopefully nursing works out for me) and also several robes. Maybe another good option would be loose fitting maxi dresses and skirts? If you have to get a c section, I’ve heard that having high waisted granny panties and leggings are good b/c you don’t want anything pressing hard on the incision.
Anon says
I’m 16 weeks PP. My legs were very swollen from the IV for first 2 weeks. My maternity yoga pants were too small! Buy some large sweats for early days.
sfg says
I’m 4 weeks PP and spend most of my time in nursing tanks (so far, just Target ones) layered under a shirt and yoga or pajama pants. I also like the Cake seamless nursing bras from Nordstrom, they’re more support than the tanks but still really comfy.
ELL says
32g here and second the rec for the Cake seamless nursing bra, at least for errands and around the house. In truth, immediately postpartum I was topless most of the time. It was summer and made nursing really easy. Nursing tanks, cardigans, and jersey skirts when I had visitors.
Annoy Law Mom says
Nursing tanks, leggings, and long, drapey, open front cardigans. I wouldn’t get more maternity clothes because they will make you look like you are still pregnant. And I was so happy to wear normal clothes again — even having to wear a few sizes up.
Meg Murry says
My suggestion I make to everyone is to find clothes that you can wear both to sleep in and to wear out in public with minimal dressing/undressing. The first few weeks the baby isn’t necesarily going to differentiate between night and day well, so its easiest if you can just pull of a cardigan and fall into bed, and vice versa – wake up, pull on a skirt over your maternity leggings and keep going. You will need to change clothes every 12-24 hours anyway due to getting spitup, milk, food drippings from trying to cook/eat 1 handed, and who knows what else on your clothes, so its easiest if you don’t have to differentiate between pajamas and daytime clothes, and that way you aren’t embarrassed if someone comes by to visit you and you are still in pjs at 4 pm. If you are wearing flannel pjs with cutesy prints – its obvious. If you are wearing black capri workout pants – no one needs to know you slept in them but you.
That way if you want to follow the advice of “sleep when the baby sleeps” you don’t have to waste 1/2 an hour getting dressed/undressed, and if you want to run to Target or the grocery store you also don’t waste a precious half hour window getting dressed.
ETA- when people suggest cardigans – we mean machine washable, preferably able to go in the dryer, cotton or synthetic cardigans from Target, Old Navy, nomorerack or similar – not your nice work cashmere cardigans that you would be upset to ruin.
Lyssa says
Second to all of this. Yoga pants, nursing tanks/tops, and non-precious cardigans are pretty great for everything, and just change when you need to. (I initially intended to wear a hoodie instead of a cardi, but the zipper seemed to bother the baby while trying to feed, so the cardi was better.)
Meg Murry says
Also – Kat/Kate, this topic seems to come up every few weeks/months, so it might be worth making an open thread or running post on “favorite maternity leave clothes” similar to your maternity wear post. Then people can weigh in on their favorite nursing tanks & shirts, cheap open cardis, etc.
Anon says
What did you do about sports bras when you were pregnant? I’m normally a 34A or B, and I’m 11 weeks pregnant and my sports bras are starting to feel too tight. I plan to keep running as long as I can and then continue with different workouts, so I’ll need to buy some new ones, but I know from past experience my size will steadily increase throughout my pregnancy (I ended up a 38D during the first weeks of nursing last time). Last time I gave up workouts because I was sick and exhausted, but I’m hanging in pretty well so far and want to keep at it.
Should I just plan on buying a few in every size between here and there, or do they make magic adjustable sports bras for pregnant/nursing/rapidly fluctuating women?
EB0220 says
I have bought a few of the Moving Comfort sports bras for pregnancy and nursing. They have a clasp in the back, so they are somewhat adjustable for band size. Some of them also have adjustable shoulder straps, which could help a bit for cup size fluctuations.
EB0220 says
I will also add that my bra size did not fluctuate as much with #2. My body seemed to return to its baseline level of milk production quickly, so I never felt massively engorged like I did with #1.
mascot says
I would go with ones that have adjustable straps and a bra clasp back. You can also get the bra band extender clasps to give you some additional band room.
CHJ says
I bought some of the cheap ($15) Champion sports bras from Target, in one size up, and I would wear two at a time when working out, or just one at a time for lounging around on weekends.
Anon says
A question about sharing parental responsibilities in a two-career family when you’re at very different stages:
Have any of you welcomed your first child at a point in your lives where you and the other parent were at very different career stages? One of us recently completed a PhD and is entering industry, and the other has been on a different professional path (law) for about a decade. What are some of the things we should consider when figuring out how to balance responsibilities for drop-offs/pick-ups, doctors appointments, sharing household responsibilities, etc, with as minimal as possible a hit to our respective careers? We will both keep working full time.
mascot says
Honestly, we just go with whoever has the most flexibility for that particular task and outsource things like housekeeping. We don’t keep score about whose career is more important; I think that is a formula for resentment. One of us has higher earning potential (although the higher earner changes from time to time), one of us has more seniority and experience in their respective industry and each of us will have periods where we are making a run for a promotion and need to put in more time. We tried to make daycare and doctors either centrally located between our jobs or located near our house. I think you do need to consider what times of day are the busiest for you. My husband’s phone starts ringing very early whereas my day tends to get crazy around 5. So I handle drop-off, he does pickup. I have more autonomy over my schedule so if there are middle of the day things to get done, I am better equipped to handle those. His days end earlier so he takes more evening shifts.
TL:DR- Be flexible and communicate about what is/isn’t working. Don’t keep score since you both work hard to have careers.
Anon says
Thank you!
Pogo says
“don’t keep score” – that’s such great advice!
RDC says
+1 on don’t keep score. Someone once told me (someone on this board maybe??) that marriage isn’t 50/50, it’s both sides giving 100%. What 100% means might change over time, but to me it means both sides are doing their best at that point in time.
PEN says
I am a lawyer (6 years practicing) and my husband is an academic (was a PhD student, now post-doc, soon to be faculty). I totally agree about not keeping score. For us it has helped to play to our own strengths and interests and to outsource as much as we can. We have a housekeeper and get a Blue Apron box every other week–all bills are paid automatically online. I really like to cook so I do the grocery shopping (online and then pick it up all ready bagged at the store) and most of the cooking. He does the dishes & takes out the trash because he doesnt hate those things. We share google calenders which we go over every sunday night. Daycare is blocks from home so it is easy to split dropoff and pickup pursuant to our schedules.
Poop question - f/u says
Thanks to all last week who recommended we see the doctor for my son’s poop issues. Turns out he does have a mass in there, may have lost some feeling as a result of the stretching… and the doctor is recommending we give him an enema for three days in a row, followed by months (seriously) of daily Miralax doses (half a cap). But “if there’s every true diarrhea” for “several days in a row” we can cut it back to a quarter cap. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.
Anyway… just thought I’d follow up. Off to go research pediatric enemas… (shudder)
Newly pregnant says
I’m glad that it’s a relatively easy thing to fix (albeit gross)!
Meg Murry says
Ugh, I’m sorry. But I’m glad you got an answer, even if its not a great one.
Once you are done with the Miralax and onto maintenance fiber, can I suggest a daily prune or two? My kids love them, I actually have to hide them in the fridge to keep them from eating too many, and I’ve found they do seem to help my kids stay regular (learned the hard way when we ran out and kids were complaining of tummy ache and sore behinds a week later).
Take 3 says
Yikes! I missed the original thread – how did you know there was an issue?
Poop question - f/u says
He kept telling us he “couldn’t feel it coming” so that’s why he kept going in his undies — we tried timing it so he was sitting on the potty during his normal pooping times, and while we got more successful there there was one troubling incident where he pooped in the potty and didn’t even realize it… and then 5 minutes later pooped in his undies again. He’s still young and I know potty training can be a long road, but that last incident raised red flags for me.
Huge thanks to whoever recommended this article — I’ll repost it here. Very helpful to give to the husband, grandparents etc who we were around last weekend.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/steve-hodges-md/potty-training_b_1370852.html
Take 3 says
Ugh – I’m so sorry for your son! That article is terrifying…I have a sensitive little guy who I’m afraid (a) won’t stop playing, and (b) will be shy about going. I have resisted potty training him, but it sounds like that’s not as fool-proof as I had hoped. Good for you for noticing and taking him to the doc!!
Pogo says
Poor kiddo. Hope he’s feeling better soon!
CHJ says
Aww, poor pumpkin. That sounds rough.
(Also, DS had a round of stomach flu lately, and we put two diapers on him, one in his regular size and one a size up, in an attempt to contain everything. It sort of worked…)
anon says
been there. far more common than i realized. a word of advice from my family and others that i’ve talked to, do not slip up on the miralax regimen. it’s easy to drop off once things start moving again, but a missed dose here or there adds up quickly and you’re right back to square one with your little one.
Aon for this says
So… prolapse. Any ladies have any experience with this? I am actually nearly two years post-partum and didn’t initially (think at least) that I had problems with this, but lately I’ve had a bad chest infection and been coughing a lot, and I think I have developed an issue. I know my pelvic floor is really weak post-birth. Anyone else epxerience this? Treatment options? Issues? This isn’t something I want to discuss with real life friends and I have a doctor’s appointment, but not for another week…
Pt says
Go see a pelvic floor physical therapist for a work up. It’s super awkward at first but they’re great and often more knowledgeable than OBs
Random says
Where do you store an emergency fund? We have parked ours in a savings account that earns almost no interest. It needs to stay liquid, but also should be earning something.
CHJ says
We keep a portion in pure cash (for us that’s about $10,000) and invest the rest. Betterment has a “Safety Net Fund” option that’s 40% stocks, 60% bonds. Vanguard and Schwab have similar options. It’s not immediately liquid if you invest it, which is why we keep a portion in cash, but the larger amount would only take 4-5 days to clear if you needed it.
CHJ says
Here’s an example of a conservative Vanguard fund that could work:
https://personal.vanguard.com/us/funds/snapshot?FundId=0724&FundIntExt=INT
NewMomAnon says
Had to update on the peanut butter suit situation – I realized this morning that both the pants and the skirt still fit (I had thought that the skirt was too small), so I wore the peanut-butter-free skirt and sent the pants to the dry cleaner. Score one for buying both pants and a skirt!
And my review was a great strategy and goal-setting session. Such a nice feeling.
Meg Murry says
yay!
and one of my favorite quotes that differentiates this s!te from the main one – “is that an acceptable amount of spit-up on a work outfit?” from the discussion on beauty minimums not long after this s!te started. Link to follow, but will be caught in moderation.
PS – if you find something that works to get the peanut-butter out without having to dry clean, let me know so I can add it to my list of emergency “I came to work with WHAT on my clothes?!?” list.
Meg Murry says
the quote is from this discussion:
http://corporettemoms.com/beauty-minimums/
EB0220 says
Uh oh… I think I have a plugged duct. I’m massaging and pumping the heck out of it now, but is there anything else I can do? I can’t go home until the normal time (3-4 hrs from now).
mascot says
Do you have access to a heating pad? That might help. Sidenote: heating pads are such an awesome item to keep at the office. I’ve noticed that several of my co-workers have them too.
EB0220 says
I do not, unfortunately.
Meg Murry says
Ibuprofen, watch for a fever or red streaks as a sign of mastitis. Loosen your bra to loosest hooks.
If you can afford to hang out shirtless, a hot warm compress made from paper towels. If you have one in your purse or car, filling a diaper or maxi pad with hot water and applying that as a hot compress works even better.
Carrie M says
I carried those hand/foot warmers with me when I was still pumping/nursing in case of emergency. Easy to tuck into any bag!
(former) preg 3L says
Have your babe nurse on that side tonight/tomorrow morning and it may clear up right away. Mine would clear up after just one nursing session.
Maddie Ross says
Pump just that side on as high a setting as you can handle (and then turn up even higher really).
anonymama says
Put warm/hot water into a milk storage bag and use that as a warm compress, along with the massaging while pumping.
Anonymous says
What kinds of backup plans do you ladies have if you are laid off or terminated? Just wondering how I should change my existing safety nets to accommodate my baby.
Meg Murry says
-If you have an emergency fund to cover X months expenses, make sure that is including the cost of daycare – because you’ll want to be able to send baby at least part time if you are hard core job searching.
-If you have a HDHP, enough money in the bank or HSA to cover the full deductible, or an emergency plan to cover it (our backup “don’t want to use it but better than credit cards” plan is that we have a home equity line we could tap into as a very last resort). I have a friend who’s kid needed emergency surgery on January 3rd the first year of their HDHP. Luckily the hospital was willing to work out a payment plan with her, but not all will.
-If your life insurance comes from your work, another plan that is private.
KJ says
– Savings that includes a portion in cash.
– Government jobs that we are highly unlikely to ever lose. I think the bigger risk for us is disability because there is no STD for federal workers, so I think of our emergency savings as more of a “getting hit by a bus” plan than a getting fired plan.
mascot says
-Savings in a tiered level of accessibility (cash, credit, equity line, stock)
– Reversible lifestyle choices. Right now we are in private school (with tuition insurance) but have good public options available as well. We hope to never need this option, but it was one of the things we talked about when buying a house. We could cut discretionary spending as well.
Anon says
I’m hoping it’s not too late in the day to post, but having some trouble and needing perspective. My mother watches our daughter twice a week and she goes to daycare the remaining days. I HATE the days she is with my mother, which is the opposite of how I thought it would go. I don’t doubt she is well cared for, but I feel like my mother now considers herself an expert on my child. At Easter she was telling my aunts and even me and my husband about things my daughter likes, etc, like she’s the mother. When we pick my daughter up at the end of the day, she is reluctant to give her up even though we haven’t seen her all day and it’s hard to get out of there. She also demanded from the start that we bring the baby to her even though it would be easier for us and more comfortable for the baby to watch her at our house (this last point is not a huge deal, but on top of everything else . . .) It’s these examples and a million other little things, but they are getting to me. I am sure some of this is intertwined in my own relationship with my mother, but just wondering if others have had more trouble with establishing boundaries with family caregivers. My mother is also sensitive and tends to ice me out rather than constructively discuss anything so taking to her sounds great in theory but from practice doesn’t work well. I’m thinking at some point soon we need to transition to full time daycare, but that in and of itself will likely cause a family issue. On the other hand she is giving us free daycare and we should be grateful.
Spirograph says
I have such mixed feelings about this — on one hand, major sympathy; we switched from nanny to daycare because our nanny acted like your mother, and I couldn’t stand it. It’s so frustrating when someone else spends more time with your baby than you do and rubs it in your face (for lack of a better way of putting that) to the point that you feel like she’s claiming ownership of your child. On the other hand, I’m really jealous that your mom is so nearby and engaged with your daughter.
Ultimately, I think you just have to ignore mom’s comments to relatives, but one thing that helped us with the protracted goodbyes was having “appointment” – even if it’s just with the stroller, a la “we need to take baby for a walk so we can be home again in time for dinner! Thanks so much, see you tomorrow!” – when we came home.
How old is your daughter? I think it would be the most natural thing in the world to do a full-time daycare/preschool once she is old enough to really appreciate and benefit from being around other little kids. Your mom could do pick-up a couple days or something so that she still feels involved.
Meg Murry says
Are you (subconsciously) feeling a little jealous that your mother gets to spend so much time with your child? If so, that’s perfectly normal – it’s hard to go to work every day and leave the kiddos behind. Could you take a vacation day to do something fun just you and your daughter?
If she’s reluctant to give her up, could you plan to have dinner there 1 of the 2 nights a week? We do this with my parents, and its turned into a win-win-win – kids have a good relationship with their grandparents, we don’t have to give up our free time on the weekends to hang out with them (unless we want to) and we don’t have to cook dinner or do dishes 1 night a week.
My kids had part-time care from my mother and/or MIL when they were babies, but for us the hardest part was inconsistent rules and discipline – grandmas wanted to be fun grandma that fed the kids ice cream for lunch and skipped nap, and it just wasn’t working. Luckily, we were able to use the “we want them to be there everyday now that they are 3 and its more of a preschool environment than daycare” and that helped avoid hurt feelings.
Is it possible that she just doesn’t have much else going on in her life, and that’s why she focuses on your daughter? Think positively – at least you know she loves your daughter.