This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
Since I haven’t really shopped for clothes in person since March, I’ve been paying more attention to Loft’s website and its many great sales. I haven’t actually shopped at one of their brick-and-mortar stores in a long time, and I don’t buy from the site often either, but I’ve snagged a few nice deals during quarantine.
This floral blouse caught my eye right away because the print sort of reminds me of a William Morris design. I really like the pintucks as well as the keyhole button closure at the back, which is small enough to still be office-appropriate. And while I’m not a big fan of ruffles in general, the ones at the neckline here are pretty subtle.
I like how they’ve styled it with the faux-suede, button-front skirt, but for the many offices where that wouldn’t fly, I think it would look just as nice tucked into some tailored pants.
The top is $59.50 but currently on sale for $29, and it’s available in regular sizes XXS–XXL and petite sizes XXS–L. Floral Pintucked Blouse
Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:
Click here to see our top posts!
And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
buffybot says
Help, my almost-3 year old is kind of a disaster!
We’re having meltdowns on essentially a daily basis, often multiple times a day. I feel like we’re trying a lot of the strategies from How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen but we’re running on empty. (Other age-appropriate book suggestions are welcome).
One of the biggest struggles is getting out of the door – he hates change of any type. He cleverly obstructs every step and whines. This includes meltdowns to go to school (which he actually loves and is happy to be at when he’s there). We try targeted choices (which shirt? what do you want for breakfast?), we try fun distractions (let’s go on a pumpkin hunt while we walk! can we race?), we try reason, we try picking our battles (you don’t want a jacket? you want to wear a PJ shirt? whatever)). All are marginally successful but some days (it’s starting to feel like most days) it only postpones the meltdown. We don’t have great strategies for ending the meltdown either, as the usual suspects don’t seem particularly effective.
Any new suggestions? Commiseration? Here are 2 big concerns: he gets a lot of screen time because of #pandemicparenting and he is VERY treats oriented which I worry is setting him up for a bad relationship with food. It can be an effective bribe but I worry it’s too effective. We have some “natural consequences” like if getting ready takes too long, he doesn’t have time to play, or stalling bedtime can mean no time for stories. But should we consider using access to screen time as a privilege that can be lost? Is 3 old enough for that kind of “consequence”? I suspect the answer may be NO screen time but that is really really hard for 2 working parents that are trying to get stuff done like work calls and such.
Anon says
Does anyone have suggestions about making connections with people mid-pandemic? We moved to our current city for my husband’s job a few years ago, and I’ve never made friends here. My child turned 2 at the beginning of 2020 and this was going to be the year I really tried to get to know other parents at school via school social events and birthday parties and then…. The result is that I now haven’t had an in-person interaction with an adult who’s not my husband in almost 8 months and my mental health and marriage are suffering. We have reached out to our few acquaintances here with kids and asked about outdoor, socially distanced play dates but no one took us up on it – it seems like most people are understandably trying to keep their bubbles small and we don’t make anyone’s cut. I have a small but tight circle of friends with similar age kids in the city we moved from, but that’s on the other side of the country, and talking to them on the phone/Zoom just isn’t the same, especially since they’re all in the same place and are (responsibly) meeting up with each other in person.
I know there isn’t an easy solution to this, but I’ve just really hit a wall and am not sure how I’m going to get through what’s likely to be at least another year of this. It’s also hard because I feel like the broader messaging from society at this point is that if you’re still not seeing anyone outside your household, it’s because you’re overly anxious about the virus and you have no one but yourself to blame. But I’m not anxious, I just don’t have anyone to see! Would appreciate any advice you might have.
Anon says
Ack wrong place, will repost.
Anonymous says
We also have this problem, more or less, and have a few options. We use the “by the time I count to 3 you are going to lose your teeth brushing cartoon” (or the choice of cartoon, if you want to start with a lower level consequence). We count the same speed each time, and if we hit 3, we always follow through. Usually I barely say “1” and she is scrambling to act. Also, the teeth brushing without the cartoon makes it harder for us, but it’s not like trying to work at the same time, you know? So it’s a bearable consequence for the parents too. That’s our threat for basically any kind of actions or stalling we don’t like, and I think that consistency helps too- she always knows what’s on the table to lose.
We have found taking away that screen time to be the most effective consequence. But frankly I’m also not above just physically picking her up and putting her in the car, with or without shoes and jacket (which could get put on at school).
Finally, at night we try to build in lots of time for stalling on pjs. Sure, sometimes she loses a book or two because we don’t have time, but if stalling is what she would rather do, that’s fine too.
Anon says
I can commiserate! Your post actually made me laugh because it was so well-written and spot-on.
We also count to three, but our kiddo is now 4 (and behavior is improving!) and he will scream at me not to count.
Screen time is definitely the most effective consequence. We are a bit too liberal with TV, but we almost never break out his Kindle Fire, so we use that as a loss for serious behavior issues.
Our son goes to daycare, so we also try to mirror them as much as possible, which is a huge help. A few tips they shared are: physically holding his hand to do stuff (which works better for them than us. We sometimes have to pick him up and move him) and telling him that he loses things (not just screen time, but reading before bed, etc.) if he stalls too long. The trick with that is that YOU MUST FOLLOW THROUGH. Even if he’s being an angel later, we still won’t read a book if it’s too late. He can earn stuff back if we have time.
Anonymous says
I have found offering rewards for good behavior more effective than taking away privileges as punishment for bad behavior. Punishment tends to cause them to redirect their anger towards you because you are “unfair.” Can you set things up so that you can use screen time only as a reward?
For the morning battles, I’d set up the routine to involve as few transitions as possible. For example, instead of getting dressed, then having breakfast, then brushing his teeth, you could give him breakfast and then have him get dressed and brush his teeth in the bathroom. This reduces the number of location transitions from two to one and makes the activity transition from getting dressed to brushing teeth much less of an event. Give him the opportunity to do what he’s supposed to do, then do it for him. If he doesn’t want to put on his shirt, then say “It’s time to put on your shirt. Since you didn’t put it on yourself, mommy will do it for you.” Then calmly and dispassionately, without further commentary, put his shirt on, even if he fights you. Same thing with walking to school. If he won’t cooperate, strap him in the jogging stroller and go. He will protest vigorously the first few times, but don’t cave in as that will make the situation worse. Just let him scream, even in public. Then drop him at school and let the teachers deal with it.
anon says
One thing that can help as kids get bigger is to start setting expectations. For instance, at breakfast, talk through what is happening that morning and see if you can get some engagement and encourage towards a highlight of the day, for instance: After breakfast we’ll brush teeth, then get dressed, put on our shoes and then, do we need a coat today? What do you think? How does the weather look today? After we get to school, I hear your teacher has a Halloween craft. What do you think it is?
My kids at least often will lower their resistance and get with the program if they’re given fair warning of what’s coming, even if it seems silly because it’s the same routine as always. For little kids, some people have luck with a star chart with these tasks.
Anon says
there is a good Daniel Tiger episode/song about this
Anon says
This has helped a lot! We talk the next care being a “school day” several times, and that always reduced the resistance.
AwayEmily says
We deal with a version of this. The most helpful thing for us is (1) having a very very consistent routine for transitions and (2) nipping it in the bud QUICKLY when it starts to escalate. My feeling is that when my 2.5yo starts to wind himself up (not able to choose between coats, running away from the door, etc) that is a sign he needs us to take a firm hand. So, if he doesn’t choose a coat, we say “looks like you are having trouble choosing, I will choose for you” and choose it. If he cries, so be it, just stay firm and consistent. Similarly, if he runs away from the door when it’s time to go, “Either walk to the car yourself or I will carry you.” If he doesn’t do it himself, we say “Looks like you are having trouble, I will carry you.” The key is to NOT give in when you pick him up and he says “NO NO I will walk I will walk don’t carry me!” Make a choice, carry it out, don’t show any weakness.
Anonymous says
We have been able to greatly speed up the morning routine with our barely-3 and almost-5 year old since daycare reopened this summer. We’ve taken all toys from their rooms and relocated them to the playroom downstairs. In order to go downstairs in the morning, they need to be dressed and teeth brushed (and hair done for DD). If they waste time upstairs fighting us getting ready, they don’t have time to play before school. All that’s left for them to do is put on shoes (were a no-shoes-inside household). It’s worked really well.
Anon says
A couple of thoughts, as I also have a very strong-willed and opinionated 3YO. For changes, it’s really helpful for my kid to know the change is coming and be able to prepare. So I will often say, you can do X for 5 (or 3 or 1) more minute, and then we are going to do Y (e.g., watch PBS kids last night, then go take bath). I then ask our smart speaker to set the timer, and DD usually reacts with minimal complaining when it goes off. Your “targeted choices” seem open-ended to me still (and maybe that’s just the way you described them). I offer kid two choices, both of which are acceptable to me and should be acceptable to her (red shirt or blue shirt; dress or pants; milk or juice; yogurt or toast). Being the kid she is, she will pick option C, and I just repeat that’s not on the menu, offer her A or B, and if she doesn’t choose, I will choose for her (which usually motivates her to choose). If she is really digging in her heels, we count 3-2-1 and then time out. I rarely get past 1 these days, but she very much dislikes a time out (we put her on the stairs for a few minutes). Dealing with a brief time out is faster and more effective than continuing to fight every single thing and she is usually more compliant afterwards. I do not find delayed consequences work for her yet (e.g., if you don’t do X, we can’t do Y later) because the time linkage doesn’t seem to be there yet, and she is not bribeable or motivated by positive incentives (yes, potty training was a joy).
Anonymous says
My kids would have lost it if they had to deal with that many decisions in the morning. We have a set meal plan for breakfast. MWF- choice of two cereals with milk. T/TH – banana or apple with toast and glass of milk. 15 minutes to eat. If they aren’t finished they can have a small granola bar after they are in the car on the way to school. At 6 and 9 they dress themselves but at age 3 I was 100% putting on an episode of DT and dressing them. Clothes get put on in the living room, picked out the night before. If they ask to wear something else, they are told they can wear it tomorrow. If there is jacket refusal, just put it in his daycare backpack.
It seems like you are expecting him to like or be happy about the morning routine. That’s not realistic in my experience. He has to eat breakfast and get dressed because that’s what we do in the morning. Consequence of not co-operating with getting dressed is that he gets brought to daycare in pyjamas. Just put clothes in daycare bag.
Anonanonanon says
Mostly commiseration. I’m without childcare right now and my husband works out of the house so it’s just me. It’s been… a lot of fits from my almost-3-year-old.
Timers do help, as someone suggested. I try to make sure I give her attention when she’s behaving and playing by herself while I try to work, so she’s not throwing fits for attention, but it’s hard.
Time out for things like throwing toys is non-negotiable.
blueridge29 says
I remember that age well, it is really, really hard, but there is a lot of good advice above. I loved the board book Calm Down Time by Elizabeth Verdick. It looks like there are also some videos of it being read aloud on youtube if you want to preview it before purchasing.
This little board book was so helpful for my kids at 3. We read this book when they had a melt down (well after they calmed a bit down a bit.) It is such a soothing book and gives kids tips on how to calm themselves down – read a book, sing a song, cuddle. It sounds out there, but I swear it works and as a parent I found it calming to have a script to deal with BIG FEELINGS.
Anonymous says
How close to 3? Mine and all my friend’s kids did this for a few weeks right around the time they turned 3, within a few months. It was just total insanity for a few weeks and then passed. Hold on tight, you’ll get through it.
Pogo says
Solidarity, and +1 to everything above. To underline, my biggest successes are (1) using limited screen time or stickers as a reward and (2) holding your ground and not arguing.
For (1) I made the change after posting on here about how I’d let my son watch videos on my phone while I dressed him, changed his diaper, etc. Now he gets it AFTER doing all that, and just while brushing teeth (it would often turn into 10 min of video). I also will give him stickers for “being a cooperator” at night but only the next morning – so he can’t get his sticker and then wander out of bed 50 times.-
For (2) I think I also learned on here just saying “ok let me know when you’re ready” (to get in bath, to brush teeth, etc) and then walk away. No cajoling or begging. It really works after holding firm LO will quickly say “I’m ready!” DH is not great at this esp wrt to eating and continues to beg LO to eat “just two more bites” or whatever. I am of the belief that we should let him eat or not eat, and not argue, but we’re still working on that one. Arguing with a toddler is so fruitless and counterproductive but DH can’t help himself.
anonyK says
I have an extremely strong willed 5 yo. I have found 1,2,3 Magic way more helpful than How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen and I wish I had started it when he was 3. It is not wholly incompatible either- both are helpful. But kids need clear boundaries and rules sometimes and you just can’t talk about every little thing- especially with particularly strong willed kids like mine who will litigate every detail (I am a litigator! And he drives me batty!). In addition to that, I echo what everyone else has said- talk about the day ahead, what will happen at school, seeing his friends. Timers are effective- my kid loves to race a timer. Do things in the same order every day. I am also willing to pick up my kid and manhandle him into the carseat when necessary. And I don’t fight him about his clothes. He looks crazy many days and that just is what it is.
Io says
Shift breakfast to last thing or in the car (yogurt pouch and granola bar). It’s not a bribe, it’s just when the motivational part of the morning occurs.
Anon says
Does anyone have suggestions about making connections with people mid-pandemic? We moved to our current city for my husband’s job a few years ago, and I’ve never made friends here. My child turned 2 at the beginning of 2020 and this was going to be the year I really tried to get to know other parents at school via school social events and birthday parties and then…. The result is that I now haven’t had an in-person interaction with an adult who’s not my husband in almost 8 months and my mental health and marriage are suffering. We have reached out to our few acquaintances here with kids and asked about outdoor, socially distanced play dates but no one took us up on it – it seems like most people are understandably trying to keep their bubbles small and we don’t make anyone’s cut. I have a small but tight circle of friends with similar age kids in the city we moved from, but that’s on the other side of the country, and talking to them on the phone/Zoom just isn’t the same, especially since they’re all in the same place and are (responsibly) meeting up with each other in person.
I know there isn’t an easy solution to this, but I’ve just really hit a wall and am not sure how I’m going to get through what’s likely to be at least another year of this. It’s also hard because I feel like the broader messaging from society at this point is that if you’re still not seeing anyone outside your household, it’s because you’re overly anxious about the virus and you have no one but yourself to blame. But I’m not anxious, I just don’t have anyone to see! Would appreciate any advice you might have.
OtterMom says
I have so much commiseration. I moved 2.5 years ago, and for the first 18 months was traveling probably 40% of the time, and the rest of the time was spent in fertility treatments (and then on maternity leave!), and making local friends wasn’t really a priority. While I’m lucky enough to have family close (a sister), both she and her husband work in health care, in hospitals where there are Covid patients, so we aren’t seeing them. I don’t have any close friends locally, but the one thing I’ve been able to do is say hello to neighbors (and actually get to know them a bit better) through walks through my neighborhood. Still not friends, nothing much more than a couple of pleasantries at this point, but it has helped with the isolation a little bit.
Anon says
Thanks, it helps to know there are others in the same boat! Sorry you can’t see your sister, that must be tough.
NYCer says
This is really tough! Are playgrounds open in your city? I can usually find a mom to chat with there. Obviously this isn’t a real “friend” (in most cases, though I have in the past made friends at the playground), but at least it would be some adult interaction. I try to find a mom with a child about the same age as mine. Also, we tend to go to the same playground every Saturday morning and have found that you start seeing the same kids/parents over and over. Obviously not every weekend, but fairly frequently. It definitely makes it easier to be like “oh hi, I see you are on the same schedule as us.”
Any outdoor classes for 2 year olds? My daughter goes to an outdoor music class in the park, and I think there are also some outdoor dance/gymnastics/soccer classes. She goes with her nanny during the week, but I would imagine you might be able to strike up another mom there too.
Good luck!
Anonymous says
I’ve totally made mom friends in the before times t the playground! It’s awkward but you just ask for their number/email. Maybe you’d have better luck with moms of one child instead of two (who might already have friends/their bubble).
Anon says
Thanks for the suggestions! We do go to playgrounds, but for some reason they are very uncrowded and we rarely see anyone else, especially our neighborhood playground where we go to the most. It’s nice from a Covid perspective, but not from an isolation one.
I’m so jealous of everyone who has lots of outdoor class options! My state is fully reopened, so there’s nothing outside (or even inside but requiring masks) for kids as far as I can tell, except soccer. We did do soccer this summer, but no one wore masks or maintained distance so it was more stressful than fun for me and my child didn’t seem to get anything out of it that we couldn’t do by kicking a soccer ball at home, so we ended up quitting when daycare reopened because we didn’t want to do anything that could jeopardize our childcare arrangements. Next summer we will hopefully get to do swim lessons. There’s an adult ballet studio in my area that has classes where you have to keep your mask on the whole time, so I’m considering doing that but will probably wait until we get past this holiday surge.
Anon says
Our neighborhood playground is usually empty, but when I see other people out walking (lunch time and 5-6PM seem to be popular), I hustle my kid out for a walk. We’ve been in our neighborhood 5 years, but I still pretend I’m “new” (since I work a lot and don’t have a dog so I literally see no one) and strike up conversations with people. Kiddo loves to pet dogs, and most folks are willing to stop and let her pet, which then allows me to chit chat. I will say that I would be more willing to do an outdoor, social distanced meet up with adults (who I trust will be able to keep their masks on and keep far apart) than I am willing to do a meet up with kids (who try, but are not always the best, my own included). You might also try asking one of your acquaintances to do an activity, rather than a playdate. E.g., head to a park for a picnic. We have wineries with us with outdoor seating, so that would be an easy one if you both make reservations for the same time and get tables next to each other. We have had 1 playdate since March, with good friends, and they came over to roast marshmallows on our fire pit from opposite sides of the patio, but we (and our parents who we are seeing) are high risk so we’re probably in that “overly anxious” category.
Anon says
i totally feel where you are coming from. we’ve been in our city for 4 years, but i spent time pregnant with twins laying on the couch with morning sickness, then with terrible PPA/PPD and it being so so hard to get out of the house with twins bc by the time i fed and changed them, it was time for another nap. last year when they were finally on one nap we started getting out a bit more and making connections with people and we’ve had a nanny but were planning to start them in part-time preschool this fall and then covid hit, so we decided to hold off on preschool and a lot of our connections weren’t very well established yet, so they basically evaporated. i am so jealous of all my friends who i see on social media with these ‘bubbles’ of people and feel quite lonely as well. at the same time, i am not totally comfortable having conversations with random people at the playground (ppl here dont really keep masks on) because i don’t know their covid activities. no real advice other than commiseration. if you lived near me, i’d love to hang out! i think the adult ballet class you mentioned above sounds like a great idea for you.
Anon says
Yes, we have that issue with masks too. We don’t see people much on the playground, but when we do I try to keep our distance because they almost never have masks on. I feel like I’m this weird pandemic Goldilocks, because I don’t really want to hang out with people who refuse to wear masks and have their kids in tons of indoor activities, but then the people who are more cautious don’t want acquaintances in their bubbles.
Anon says
i don’t know if you want to share, but where do you live now? maybe someone on here wants to hang out
Anon says
A friend in a similar situation started a book club in her neighborhood. They have been meeting on zoom or outside in a socially distanced circle in someone’s yard.
FVNC says
Offering commiseration as well. We relocated cross-country in June, to a city where we don’t have any friends. I’ve tried to “put myself out there” by doing things like inviting my 2nd grader’s classmates for outdoor playdates, inviting neighbors for patio drinks (distanced), etc. but only ~half accept the invitation (understandably) and those that do, don’t reciprocate. While I understand that failing to reciprocate doesn’t mean that these families don’t want to interact, it’s hard always being the “asker.” Added to this, people in this city tend to have grown up here, have family and friends, and therefore have built-in networks. It’s been really hard and isolating.
Anon says
I don’t have kids yet but I have seen success on my town’s FB page with people moving in and looking for a friend for their kid, even during the pandemic.
People basically post what you just said “I moved here a year ago, I don’t know anyone yet. I have an x year old kid. Would anyone be willing to meet up for a walk or a play in the yard? He needs a friend and frankly, so do I.”
Someone else posted that their kid was desperate for a dog but mom was allergic and could kid visit some dogs in town, or walk them. She got tons of responses and the kid had like 20 dogs to go visit outside.
I also live in a pretty friendly town!
Anon says
in a similar boat with kids the same age. if you don’t mind sharing what city you live in, maybe someone on here would want to meet up with you
Anonymous says
Is your kid in daycare? My youngest is 2 and we’ve had playdates with some of the families in her daycare class. Parents wear masks and/ or sit outside far apart and we don’t make the 2 y/os wear them (some do out of habit).
Anon says
Yes, we’re in full time daycare so I’m not worried about my child’s socialization, at least. How did you meet/contact the other parents? I have very minimal interaction with other parents now with the new drop off procedures, not that I ever really had long conversations at dropped since everyone works, and no contact info for anyone except our class “room mom.” I was thinking of emailing her about a play date (we’ve spoken briefly) but my husband said that would be weird since she didn’t share her email with me for play date purposes.
COVID vs. Not says
How are you thinking about sickness and this winter? Is a COVID test required at any sight of symptoms, which are so common place with just run of the mill toddler colds?
2 year old DD didn’t have a test but we went to the pedi for a suspected ear infection on Sunday and despite her stopped up nose and brief 100.6 fever, she had no other symptoms and he thought it was unnecessary to test her. We have had no known exposure. Here we are today, on antibiotics, and she’s all good. I, on the other hand, took a direct hit sneeze from her into my mouth on Sunday, and I wake up today with a fiery throat, sinus pain, thick green snot (sorry), hurting ears – every classic sign of a cold.
I would bet a whole lot of money that it’s just a cold and, if history is reliable, I’ll have a sinus infection in a week. I’m going to get COVID tested today because the symptoms are so aligned and we have a nanny and see my parents on weekends typically. I want to just be able to put everyone at ease and prove I don’t have COVID. That said, is this how the winter is going to go? How are you handling run of the mill sniffles and whatnot vs. COVID? I’m all for safety and distancing, we probably won’t see my parents this weekend as this works through my system, but I guess I just hadn’t thought this through fully. It’s going to be a long New England winter, isn’t it?
Anonymous says
My hope is that all the steps we are taking to avoid COVID exposure will also protect us against other bugs and we won’t have to worry about testing.
OP says
That is (or was) my hope, but somehow DD got this cold that I now have. I guess my question is, assume you take all good and reasonable steps to protect you and your family, but you still somehow catch an assumed cold and don’t have any known COVID exposure. What’s the plan / what’s responsible? I can’t quarantine for 14 days and not have a nanny for each time one of us gets a cold.
I feel like I have to get a negative test today and each time we face this through the winter to prove it’s “just a cold”. I’m in MA so it’s easy to drive up and get tested – I plan on being there this afternoon when they open at 2pm. But, is that what others are planning on doing too if you’re trying to avoid the full on quarantine because you have some symptoms but not all?
Anonymous says
Get tested every time I have Covid symptoms.
anon says
Commiseration. My toddler caught a cold that then spread to my husband and myself and we’re now recovering. I’m angry because I feel like we are so careful but clearly not careful enough. We didn’t test our daughter because our ped said she didn’t present the right symptoms and she was only sick for a couple days. When my husband and I both got sick though, I did make him get tested and request both the rapid and PCR test because I’m pregnant and felt that I needed to know for sure. (I would have gotten tested too but felt the potential exposure wasn’t worth it while pregnant.) We felt that if we have any symptoms or illness that we needed to know for sure because I can’t ask our nanny to come to work if we potentially have COVID. I was ok asking our nanny to come when it was just our daughter who had a cold and after the pediatrician said she didn’t have any classic covid symptoms. My husband’s tests were thankfully negative but now I vacillate between thinking we need to go back to serious lockdown, i.e. no playgrounds, no nanny, no outdoor, masked meetups, etc., and realizing that we have to accept some risk to live through the next year with as few mental health issues as possible.
I just don’t know the right answer. But I would caution anyone who thinks that they can make it through winter without any illness at all. It is very easy to assume right now that anyone who gets a cold isn’t doing enough to prevent illness and it is their “fault” if they get sick, but that just isn’t the case. You can do 99% of things right and one single thing “wrong” and boom. And no one with kids is able to do things 100% “right”.
OP says
Thank you for your last paragraph. In the “I Do Quarantine Better Than You” war, no, we’re not the winner but we’re pretty darn good. I’m also in IVF treatments (in a down cycle, thank god, so this doesn’t delay anything in this moment) so we’re extra safe. Sickness happens. It’s not our fault. I know that wasn’t this thread OP’s words but I appreciate the PSA to remind folks that this is going to happen to even the most responsible among us.
Anonymous says
You would think, but if your child is in any childcare then they still might pick something up. And as things open up more and we see more people germs will spread.
Katala says
This. I’ve been hearing that while obviously little kids can get and spread Covid, they are not the main spreaders because their immune systems work differently. Flip side being that little kids will be the main spreaders of some other viruses (as anyone with a kid in daycare knows to be true). So even if Covid isn’t spreading in a daycare, that doesn’t mean their precautions would prevent EVERY virus. That’s just not realistic. I don’t have an answer, and we’re keeping both kids home right now, but that won’t work forever so I’m at a loss.
Anonymous says
Yes, I think this is true. There are a lot of people saying “if they catch a cold, obviously the precautions aren’t working” but my understanding is that kids spread colds much more easily than Covid (which of course is not to say they CAN’T spread Covid, just that it’s harder for them to spread than colds). Judging by the number of people I know with kids in daycare or school who caught colds or other viruses in the classroom but didn’t catch Covid despite a classmate or teacher testing positive, I think there is truth to this.
Rhinoviruses that cause many colds are also some of the smallest viruses there are, so you would expect masks to be less effective against colds than Covid and flu (for everyone, not just for kids).
Anon says
We COVID test one person in the family per illness. So my 2-year-old and I both had symptoms. I went and got tested (negative) and we assumed he was negative, too, since he had the same thing. We did stay out of daycare until we got the negative test (which was pretty quick in my city). The second time both kids had something. Our older son was tested (negative) and we assumed the younger one had the same thing.
It seems to be working okay. I gave blood and my antibody test came back negative. We have had 4 colds/something in the family since March.
Anonymous says
DD has had two colds in the past two months. For the first one my mom caught it and got COVID tested multiple times because she’s a hypochondriac. As in she had 4 negative tests and kept getting herself tested. I think we won’t get tested unless DD or DS had fever and noticeable cough (neither cold she had a cough). Obviously would get ourselves tested if we had fever/cough/GI symptoms. I don’t get fevers with a cold. I’m in MD though so it’s really easy to get tested. I more just don’t want to put my child through the test unnecessarily. She’s old enough to remember this stuff now.
Anon says
I think the masks and other precautions will reduce if not fully eliminate the routine bugs. We went back to daycare in July and DD has only had one illness since then, a very minor cold that DH and I did not catch (in comparison, by this time last fall, she’d had two bad colds that turned into ear infections, plus croup, and I caught everything). We did not have to get a Covid test or keep her home from school since there was no fever or cough, although we did keep her home for one day when she had a very runny nose as a courtesy, even though she was clearly not patient zero. I don’t think our school requires Covid tests even if you have fever or cough, you just need to stay at home until 48 hours after symptoms have resolved, so that’s what we’ll do.
We don’t have any contact with grandparents, I’d definitely be inclined to Covid test regularly (even if I weren’t symptomatic) if I were seeing people over the age of 60.
Anon says
I’m getting myself tested regularly, trying to avoid getting kids tested except when necessary.
rosie says
Commiseration. I suggest being super extroverted on social media (not really a thing but hopefully you know what I mean — you have to put yourself out there in local FB groups or whatever is big in your area). There should be other people in your situation, who may have recently moved themselves or otherwise don’t have an established social group.
Also, don’t worry about messaging from society. No one should be blaming themselves for anxiety over a global pandemic. This was a funny read that resonated https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/another-dull-quarantine-weekend-at-home-target-chipotle-home-depot-and-our-nieces-graduation-party
rosie says
Ugh wrong spot, this was meant for the poster who was asking about meeting people.
Anon says
Kid’s preschool requires kid to stay out if anyone in the family has any of the long list of symptoms that could be Covid, unless there’s a negative Covid test, clearance by a doc, or it’s abundantly clear that the symptom is part of a longstanding condition.
We get a lot of Covid tests.
Other than preschool, we’re pretty isolated, so I don’t know that we’d be doing so many Covid tests (for what’s likely allergies, a cold, etc) if we were just at home or outside, masked, and keeping our distance from people. I’d probably still test aggressively if we had a medical appointment or some other reason we had to be close to other people or inside a building with other people.
Anonymous says
To the extent I have a plan at all, my plan is to get a test at the first sign of anything resembling a symptom. I’m way too anxious to “wait and see.” Test are easy to get and not too slow in my area — my last PCR came back in about 26 hours. My kid is a big older and in school so I would lean towards testing if possible.
Anon says
I will caution that our ped said you can miss it if you test too soon. For our son, we waited until he’d had symptoms for a few days to ensure he’d have enough virus to test positive (if he had it – he didn’t).
Anonymous says
You can definitely miss it if you test too soon after exposure, but if you have symptoms it’s not too soon, especially for a PCR test, which is very sensitive. The window where you’d likely get a false negative is after exposure but before symptom onset when the virus is replicating in your body but isn’t at detectable levels yet.
Anonymous says
Anyone entering the Nugget lotto today? I haven’t gotten the link to the page where u enter at 12pm. Please share if you have it! My DH thinks I’m insane but I figure it will be good for fort building this winter
Anon says
We have one and #2 is being shipped shortly. I have a 2.5 year old and we LOVE it. Got it in April and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect.
Anonymous says
I think the nugget seems like an overpriced Old Couch From Someone’s Basement but dressed up fancy for the ‘gram.
Anonymous says
OP here – eh, I get that, but I’m sick of my kids building forts and pulling all the couch cushions off every other day. And it bothers DH even more than me. Plus couches have harder frames which my DD has already busted her lip and torn her frenulum on. I’ve also heard first hand from my friends who have them.
Anon says
I mean yes, but I like to sit on my couch and not play couch cushion roulette while trying to put our sectional back together. It’s also helped create boundaries with, er, “spirited” DD. Nugget is for horseplay, couch is not. Allowing craziness on nugget cut down on her couch acrobatics meaningfully. We can also put the nugget away, the couch is always there. Boundaries for toddlers, at least one like mine, benefit all of our sanity.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it’s a must have (like most toys TBH), but if it’s in the budget and you have the space, I highly recommend.
Spirograph says
Agree. If we didn’t already have an couch in my kids’ room, I’d consider it, but I wouldn’t buy it just as a toy (partly because I don’t have space to store an extra toy couch). I don’t mind blanket and couch cushion-fort building in our family room now that the kids are big enough I can tell them to put the couch back together, and we also have ikea play tents and tunnels that scratch this particular itch for a lot cheaper, albeit less insta-worthy. I kinda think that half the fun of forts is building them with repurposed “found materials.”
I totally understand the appeal, though, especially for preschool and toddler kids.
TheElms says
We have 2 and they are awesome. It is by far my 17 month old’s favorite toy and the only toy she requests to play with my name (they are in the basement and she needs an adult to help her down the stairs). I can’t really justify a third but its tempting. Also, I think other people should get a chance to get their first or second nugget.
Anonymous says
My family had a 70s folding couch that had a vinyl bottom, and we could reconfigure it like a slide. We loved it. It doesn’t seem that expensive for its size. But we live in an NYC apartment so nope.
anon says
We have two and I love them (I’m from the triangle though – so if I needed any justification it’s supporting local). Our couch cushions don’t come off, so we don’t have that option. Prior to the lotto I was able to snag them using my phone instead of their website, not sure it matters anymore though.
Good luck!
anonyK says
We have one in my son’s room. Both he (5) and his sister (16 mo) love it. I love/hate it. Someone is going to break their neck on it one of these days because he is always doing all kinds of crazy stuff- ramps/jumps/slides that the 16 mo old tries to copy. It’s cool, but supervision required! Not in a hurry to get another one.
Bathing kids together says
What age did you stop bathing kids of the same gender together? Our DD is two years older than our DS for reference. They also share a room, so maybe that’s a part of this question too…
Anonymous says
I think general guidance is when they ask for privacy or to have their bath alone. Frankly my DD is so big at 3.5 I don’t see it lasting that much longer. Like maybe 5?? And different states do have laws on sharing bedrooms with kids of opposite genders.
OP says
Hmm yeah I’m not sure when they’ll ask! They definitely like sharing now. DD is 6 and DS just turned 4. Just trying to plan ahead really and this occurred to me last night…
AwayEmily says
This is false, unless you are talking about foster children. There are no state or federal laws regulating whether opposite-gender siblings can share a bedroom.
Anonymous says
Right, how would the state enforce that? Provide people a place to live with more bedrooms? or just take all the children of one gender away?
Clementine says
Agreed with this. FWIW, in my state opposite gendered kiddos have to be in separate rooms when they turn 8.
Clementine says
(For foster kids)
Spirograph says
My daughter is almost 6 and has been vocal about not wanting to bathe or shower with her brothers for the last few months. Older son (7.5) doesn’t mind bathing with his brother (4), but prefers to shower alone. I think we’re done bathing opposite gender kids together, and don’t have much longer with shared bath time in general.
They all still share a room and run are only sporadically private about their naked bodies, though.
Anonymous says
We stopped around age 5-6 as it was just not enough room in the tub. Now generally one is brushing their teeth while the other is showering. Sometimes older kid asks for more privacy and I let her have the bathroom to herself.
FVNC says
My 7 yr old daughter and 3.5 yr old son bathe together. I think our daughter is a little late to the privacy concept; she just recently (and not consistently) started saying she needs privacy when using the bathroom. They both still enjoy running around the house nekkid, so clearly the concept has not fully taken root!
Anonymous says
There was a story on NPR this morning about music classes that reminded me of a thread here the other day. Apparently, yes, masks are required while playing the wind or brass instrument. The story described that the students had masks with slits to put the mouthpiece through (this sounds like a disaster for reed instruments!), and the instruments were also fitted with bell covers. oh, and the whole practice was outside on a tented tennis court with the kids 14 feet apart from each other.
Part of me was happy they found a way to do instrumental music, and part of me was just so sad that these kids are missing out on the experience of playing in a large ensemble.
Anonymous says
I don’t understand how this is anything but hygiene theater. If there’s a hole in the mask, they are breathing through that hole every time they inhale, and every time they exhale while they are not actually blowing into the instrument. Bell covers are not terribly helpful for woodwinds because air escapes through the open keys, and not at all effective for flutes and piccolos. I would never permit my child to participate in this activity. I play a wind instrument and sing, and I’ve given up all in-person rehearsals and performances. It’s just too risky, for me and for everyone around me.
Anon says
What about outside, far apart, no hygiene theater?
Anon says
Mine were 4 and 6, I think, though a lot of that was because they were just getting too big and apt to fight. But they would also sometimes want to roughhouse and play in a way that seemed a bit too close with nudity. They’re 5 and 7 now, and still change in front of each other without any concern most of the time. We have a separate shower, and they usually bath at the same time (one in the shower and one in the bath, with me flitting between to help), to save time.
Ifiknew says
Where can I get masks that will actually fit my 3 year old well? Everything we have she seems to be constsntly pulling over her nose because it slides.
Anon says
My 3YO wears the old navy kids one, but she is on the bigger side.
Anon says
Old Navy ones fit my 2.75 year old pretty well now, she’s also big for her age. The Etsy shop WestCoastClearance sells toddler masks that fit her very well at the beginning of the pandemic but are getting too small now. (Ugh I can’t believe this pandemic has been going on long enough for my kid to outgrow her masks, but here we are.)
rosie says
Happymasks dot co. Lots of adjustable components to help get a secure fit, I suggest size small for a 3-yo. Built-in filter.
FVNC says
The School Mask Pack masks from Crayola that are advertised on various podcasts fit my 3.5 yr old really, really well. They took forever to ship, though. (He’s on the small side.)
Anon says
We bought from Dare2BStylish on Etsy. Terrible name, but the masks stay on our kids really well. And we donated some to daycare and they stay on other kids, too!
Disposable mask advice says
For those of you who use disposable masks, where do you buy them, and how are you sure they aren’t scammy products that don’t actually provide protection? Maybe I am paranoid, but I am having a hard time finding three-ply pseudo-surgical masks that have good reviews…I tried a medical supply company, Target and evil/overrun Amazon, and none of the reviews inspired confidence. Looking for me, my partner and my kiddos, ages 5 and 7, to use as backups or if we actually get sick. Thanks.
Anonymous says
I’ve had a pack from costco and a pack from heys. Both packs were fine. I keep a 50 pack in each car and my desk so I have them around when I forget my cloth one.
No Face says
I bought mine at Home Depot of all places, for me and my kid.
Anonymous says
Costco- they’re great. I think you can buy them on their website without being a member.
Pogo says
Our workplaces provide them, so husband stocks up when he’s in the office (I have not needed to go in yet). Yes I have mask privilege.
anon says
+1 Costco, also our grocery store has them
Anonymous says
The amount of anxiety I have over the thought of being stuck in my house all winter (okay, maybe some outdoor activities, but not like in the summer) without trips to indoor locations and other towns entirely is rough. It will help a lot to have some ideas of fun things we can do as a family or I can do one on one with our five year old daughter at home. She’s at in-person school, so weekends are the issue. What are some fun ideas for at-home ideas this winter that I can start preparing for? Thank you!
AwayEmily says
We have a creepy unfinished basement but during the pandemic set it up as art area — we put a table in the corner and the paints are all down there, so sometimes it’s a nice change of scenery. So maybe get a few art books (I liked The Artful Parent) and set up an art area somewhere separate from the regular playroom?
Embrace taking all the cushions off the couch to make bouncy houses/forts/etc. Put an extra bin of pillows and blankets in the living room for spontaneous fort-building.
Somersault practice (we use an old crib mattress but you could also get a tumbling mat).
Legos. I reached out to a coworker with older HS kids and asked if I could have their old Legos. I ended up with a GIANT bin and my 4yo loves playing with them (we keep them put away so it’s a special treat to get to play with them).
Making cards and sending them to friends/family.
Baking/cooking projects.
Not at home, but driving to new neighborhoods and going on walks there can be a nice change of scenery.
Anon says
Fire pit, making smores, stargazing. I love to cook and bake, so cookie baking (all the sprinkles and cut out cookies). Cake baking and decorating (use a 6 inch or 4 inch cake pan so you don’t have absurd amounts of cake for a family of 3). Fancy sunday brunch (waffles, bacon, eggs, fruit, etc. with mimosas for adults and sparkling cider for kid). You could do a virtual cooking class together (I have been getting emails for those). Outdoor parks (well bundled). Break out the art supplies and have a contest – who can paint a bowl of fruit, or your house, or the backyard. Jewelry making or friendship bracelets? Weaving potholders (I know I did that as a kid, just not sure what age I was, definitely under 8). Friday night pizza (make your own or delivery) and movie? Or family board game night (candyland, ticket to ride, clue?). I was also learning to sew and do cross-stitch around that age.
Anon says
I feel ya. I despise winter in the best of times, and these are not the best of times. Some things I’m looking forward to this winter:
1. A driving trip to Florida for warmer weather and sunshine
2. Separate visits from my parents and my husband’s sister (with appropriate quarantine/testing, etc.)
3. I have so much excess vacation time this year that during the 2 week quarantine before my parents come I’ve decided I’m going to take the day off any day the temperature gets to 50 degrees, so we can play outside most of the day. Even in the Midwest, we get sporadic nice days well into December, but I usually can’t take advantage of them because of school/work.
4. Allllll the baking. We already bake a lot of cookies and muffins, but I want to do some more labor-intensive things like cinnamon rolls and croissants, and I want to involve my kid in the whole process from choosing the recipe to shopping for ingredients to the actual baking.
5. Snuggling up as a family under blankets and reading or watching movies.
That’s it, that’s pretty much all I got.
Anonymous says
Why can’t you instead plan to leave your house and go outside? Go to a playground in a different town if they’re open. Go for walks in the woods. Pack a thermos of hot chocolate. Sure you might not be outside all day every day but we go outside every weekend day rain or shine. It’s so essential to all of us.
Anon says
She didn’t say she’s never leaving her house, she said she won’t be able to go outside as much as she did in the summer. If you live somewhere where you enjoy getting outside every weekend year-round, count yourself lucky. It’s not really THAT weird to not enjoy being outside when the temperature is barely above 0F, which it regularly is in the upper Midwest. I have poor circulation and there’s no amount of winter gear that can make it not physically painful for me to be outside in those temps. Of course I don’t stay inside for months at a time, but it’s not the same as spring, summer and fall in terms of how much we can get out.
anon says
Seriously. I’m so over the “why can’t you just …” suggestions. As if people haven’t already thought about the obvious.
AwayEmily says
Yup. In the summer we are easily outside for ten hours a day on the weekends. In the winter where I live the average temperature is about fifteen degrees. I’m not making my kids spend ten hours a day in fifteen-degree weather no matter how many thermoses of hot chocolate I bring.
Anon says
I’m planning to spend the winter teaching my 5 girl and 7 boy (and DH!) how to sew. We’ll start with some basic cross stitch patterns and then maybe make a pillow or two. I haven’t sewed since I was young so we’ll all be using new parts of our brain and learning things together. I ordered some simple cross stitch kits online to get started until I feel comfortable knowing what to buy on our own.
Also, look for “Family Dinner Book Club” online. A couple bloggers put together a year’s worth of themes with book recommendations, meal plans, activities, and discussion questions. We’re going to try the 2019 theme with books to inspire kids to make a difference – I bought the first six books from a local independent bookstore and we’ll try to do them every other weekend over the cold months.
No Face says
We will be cooking/baking together and binge watching movies.
rakma says
We have the Mollie Katzen cookbooks, and have made a few recipes from them, but I think we might work our way through them in a more intentional way this winter. I’m planning on stocking up on some new art supplies, we’ve really used up the paint and playdough, and just the act of opening a new thing seems to get the kids more interested in the activity again.
I’m looking for a good way to do some hands on science experiments that aren’t just making slime or oobleck. I keep wading into Science kit reviews and getting distracted or discouraged.
Anon says
i dont know the age of your kids, or if this is too basic, but one idea is to either freeze different things, or freeze blocks of water and try using different things to melt them and see what melts the fastest/what things do/dont make a difference in melting; putting celery or cabbage in different color water; building different types of baskets for an egg drop; anything with baking soda and vinegar
rakma says
This winter they’ll be 4 and 7, and we’ve done a couple of the activities you mentioned, but we can always revisit. I’m trying to find things that aren’t giant messes, but also hold their attention–it’s quite a feat.
Anon says
Check out the Insta @sciencechickies. Her kid is 5 I think and it’s all about easy STEM activities to do at home.
rakma says
Will check that out thanks!
Ifiknew says
Sorry, threading fail. Where can I get masks that will actually fit my 3 year old well? Everything we have she seems to be constsntly pulling over her nose because it slides.
rakma says
The Old Navy kids masks work for my 3yo. Cat and Jack are too big, but fit my 6yo ok.
Boston Legal Eagle says
+1 on old navy. We’ve also got some crayons ones that have a nose adjustment and adjustable straps, although that one tends to slip off my kid’s nose.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Meant to say “crayola”
Anonymous says
My daughter is in a 2s class at school and I think 75% of her classmates wear the Old Navy ones. They’re a bit big but they work.
Anonymous says
Try twisting the ear straps so they cross once. So the piece of elastic that attaches to the bottom of the mask goes over the top of the ear, and vice versa. That seems to hold it up a bit better over the nose.
My 4 year old does best with the masks that don’t have pleats or a seam down the middle. I don’t remember where we got them, but Gap has similar. The homemade pleated ones are also OK but that’s because we sized the elastic to fit – a lot of the store-bought ones seem a little too loose.
anon says
My 10-year-old is developing some small bits of mask-ne on his nose. He’s self-conscious about it, even though his face is covered at school. Would a cleanser of some sort help? He’s young enough that I’m not sure what to do; I don’t think he needs a hard-core acne product by any means.
Holiday gifts, ugh says
I have to come up with Christmas present ideas for kiddo (5yo). I’m grateful but it feels weird to be thinking about this now.
Does anyone have experience with Plus Plus blocks? They showed up on a few toy roundup lists and look interesting, but I’d love to hear a field report.
aane-on says
I don’t think it’s crazy at all, I seriously got about 60% of my holiday kid shopping done on Amazon Prime day. I did get more plus plus blocks in fact – they are easier for little fingers to manipulate/grab than legos, and work really well if your kid is into imaginative free play (more like the big big of multi colored legos that I used to have vs. the ‘build this set’ type that’s popular now). If they’re into Legos for the branded kits then I think they’re not as great as a substitute. They are also SMALL so if you have younger siblings, animals who will investigate/eat them beware.
anon says
We love Plus Plus blocks for restaurant dining and waiting rooms. They are easy to keep in a purse and are quiet and fun. They don’t get played with much at home, however, as they don’t seem to be something my kids choose on their own.
anon says
Favorite toys for my 5 yo were:
Sleeping Queens – a card game
Walkie Talkies
A low temp hot glue gun, pipe cleaners, popsicle sticks and other recyclables
Roller Skates
Settlers of Catan Jr
Popoids
Rock Tumbler (National Geographic Brand)
Anon says
My kids love Plus Plus, but they’re big into imaginative play. There are two sizes – the smaller size is fine for my 5yo but he got a set of the bigger ones last year for Christmas and liked those too. We have these and Legos and both get lots of play – but like someone said above, Lego seems to be much more about build-and-leave sets vs create-and-tear-down open play.
Other popular toys in my house (a 5yo with an older sib)
– Micro Mini Scooter w/ helmet
– Magnatiles
– Marble run
– Imaginext characters and playsets
– Mini toys like Minecraft figures, Polly Pockets, PJ Mask micros, Disney Pop Adventures
– Calico Critters/ Lil Woodzeez figures and playsets
– Walkie-Talkies
– Science playsets – the ones from Learning Resources seem to hold up really well