Family Friday: Kimono Bodysuits

I had so many handmedowns that I didn’t buy any onesies but if I had, I would have bought kimonos exclusively, my little guy screams when something gets pulled over his head. I would have also bought multiple packs of gap socks so I didn’t have to match them.

We did the first round of vaccines today (did not realise it would be three separate needles and an oral vaccine) and while he screamed during it, he was fine by the the time we walked out the door. I also met someone in the waiting room who had a baby the same age and we exchanged numbers (horrifying my English husband).

I could use some advice. When our baby first came home, Hubs was super helpful – we even traded night feedings (baby is FF) for the first six weeks or so. Now baby is 7 months, and Hubs has completely leaned out. I can’t even get him to wash his own dishes (not an exaggeration: I have washed every dirty dish for the last two days). Last night I asked him for dates on a trip I really want to take (our first out-of-state trip since baby) and he blew up and said I was nagging him, then gave me the silent treatment all night. I’ve noticed he gets very upset when I consult him about decisions lately: he won’t answer me and tells me to stop talking about it (even small stuff like “should we send one food pouch or two to day care?”) I plan to talk to him about possibly being depressed, but any other advice? I want to listen to “how not to hate your husband after kids” but we share an Audible account and I feel like if he found out I was listening to that he would lose it.

I’ll preface this by saying that gifts aren’t my love language, but I do care a lot about getting it right when I’m gifting to others. I spent an entire evening buying birthday gifts for four of my little nieces and nephews, all of whom have birthdays in the next few weeks. Every year, I stick to a theme to keep it equal and avoid weird comparisons between the kids. These are kids I know well and love dearly, but coming up with good ideas for kids who aren’t my own is … hard? When I’m buying for my kids, I know exactly what they like, what they need, and what will get used vs. tossed aside. I’m way too aware of my siblings’ preferences to not receive a bunch of toys (which I’m fine with). Every year, I end up being the Practical Aunt and still question whether I got the balance right. This year, each kid is getting a colorful fleece pullover in his/her favorite color and a book. Last year it was art supplies.

The emotional labor involved is ridiculous. Will the kids like it? Will my siblings be OK with it? Will my nasty sister-in-law immediately re-gift it or just plain lose it? (Probably.) And why doesn’t my husband have to deal with any of this? The answer: He’s an only child.

I have read way too many snarky, complainy, sanctimonious blog posts about kids and gift giving, so now I second-guess everything. Is there anyone else with stupid hangups about gift-giving occasions? I care deeply about getting my people stuff they love, but it’s a lot more pressure than fun. It doesn’t help that we have 12 birthdays between Oct. 1 and the holidays, so it’s one loooong season of gifting.

Since this is a clothing post, this seems like a timely question…
Could anyone who has had winter babies share an estimate of what kinds of clothes I need and how much, and what the baby should sleep in in the winter months? There’s so much cute stuff online but I’m totally overwhelmed by what to buy and don’t want to purchase a bunch of cotton footie pajamas if what she needs is fleece or whatever. And general guidelines of how much baby needs of each thing and how much to buy in newborn vs how much to buy in 0-3 months would be appreciated. My family tends to make big babies (I was over 8.5 pounds and husband was almost 10) although of course I know family history is not definitive. We keep our house relatively warm in the winter but DH and I also sleep under an imitation down blanket that is very warm and I know the baby won’t have any blankets on her.

Ugh, Hanna Andersson sends me an email advertising 25% off everything — and their site has been down for 2 hours. I feel like they cannot get their act together lately – this is after I had 3 pairs of their pjs break zippers and got attitude when I brought them back to the store….

I have a toddler and a newborn so I think some of my rage might not be justified. Please tell me that. One set of grandparents texted this morning asking to come over at 7pm tonight. You know, right when we start the bedtime routine. We have told them this numerous times. I said that no, they couldn’t come over then. They offered to come earlier, but they work so they can’t feasibly come over until dinnertime. They do not offer to bring dinner and I’m not in the mood to provide it. Furthermore, when they do visit, they pay no attention to either child. They brush off my toddler when he tries to show them a toy or talk to them. I can’t handle it right now. Venting? Sympathy? What do you do with family that act like they want to be involved but are draining?