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After reading a story where Peppa Pig and her brother, George, play dentist, my youngest wants to play dentist too. Instead of using his toy screwdriver to examine my teeth, perhaps this dentist play set from make-believe experts Melissa & Doug is more fitting.
This 25-piece set includes realistic looking tools for cleaning, treating cavities, and fitting braces. It even includes a set of pretend teeth so I no longer need to play patient. The back four teeth even wiggle and lift so your little one can “extract” them (yikes!). Aside from the extractions, this may also be a good way to help little ones who are a little nervous about their first trip to the dentist.
This dentist play set is $20.99 at Target.
Sales of note for 8.30.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
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- Boden – 20% off
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lands’ End – 40% off sitewide; 50% off backpacks, 40% off kids’ apparel
- Loft – Summer sale, 30% off new arrivals; up to 50% off much more
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- Zappos – 28,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 50% off everything
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 40% off everything
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; extra 50% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 50-60% off; 50% off pants for the family
- Target – 20% off select clothing for all; up to 50% off home; up to 30% off select nursery furniture; up to 30% off kitchen & dining
Anon says
Would you take your kid to a birthday party if they had a mild cold? We RSVP’ed yes to a birthday party this weekend, but since then my daughter (5) has developed a cold. Covid test negative, no fever, no snot, acting normally, really just a cough that she’s had for a few days. If it matters, the birthday party is for a friend in her class, and she’s been going to school all week.
EDAnon says
If her symptoms are improving and she’s had it for a few days already, I think it is okay. You could ask the family.
Google results say that you’re contagious with a cold until symptoms disappear but are most contagious for the first few days of symptoms.
Anon says
Yes, especially because it’s for a school friend and she’s been in school.
I’m not even sure a cough alone is indicative of a cold. Cold, dry air makes both me and my kid cough.
NYCer says
+1.
AwayEmily says
Agree.
Boston Legal Eagle says
+3.
Anonymous says
My kid is like this — COVID in early September. Last week, 4 days of fever, no snot, now there is a hacking cough. COVID test is negative, which I’d expect since she had it so recently. IDK when you go from a cold to kiddo just has a cough, but I think we are there (cough is now on day 6). At some point, if she smoked or we smoked, a lingering cough used to just be a thing. I feel like some kids just cough all winter and keeping her out of school that long seems crazy, even if it were for a week a month it would be too much if she isn’t actively feverish or spewing snot / phlegm.
Liza says
Yes, I think it’s fine. Generally outside of COVID, I think if the child feels well enough to go out and interact with other kids, that’s a good barometer. If possible, give her medicine to help her symptoms so she’s not coughing all over the other kids.
Anon says
No. Every kid I know had a “mild cold” (more often than not, a negative COVID test too) and it turned out to be COVID (in the last five months, anyway). Things have changed in terms of people‘s risk tolerance for masking when they are not sick, but it isn’t OK to go somewhere knowingly sick anymore. That isn’t fair to other attendees. It’s also just a birthday party.
Anonymous says
Disagree that a cough = sick, much less “knowingly sick.”
Anon says
My response is colored by the sheer number of kids I know who had literally nothing more than a cough and who eventually tested positive for Covid, or their household did. I think the OP‘s kid could go to the party with a properly administered second negative test, 48 hours apart, but otherwise, it may well be Covid. Seen it time and time again.
Anonymous says
It’s 2022. It always might be COVID. That still doesn’t mean that everyone with a cough has COVID or is even sick.
Anon says
Sure, but “it could always be COVID” is hardly a persuasive argument for attending a party – the opposite, in fact.
Anon says
My daughter and her classmates have had like 10 mild colds in the last two months.none of them were Covid. There’s certainly a possibility a mild “cold”is Covid but to say it’s a sure thing seems absurd. Especially when the kid has tested negative for Covid.
This also just doesn’t even sound like a cold to me. People cough due to asthma, allergies, dry air and any number of other things. In the absence of a runny nose or fever or swollen lymph nodes or some other symptom that indicates infection, I wouldn’t even consider my kid sick.
Anon says
I guess I feel like if the party is in a public place you’re far more likely to get Covid from some random person who isn’t feeling sick and thus hasn’t tested (or is sick, but isn’t responsible enough to test) than from a kid with a cough, no other symptoms and a negative Covid test. If the party is at a house and is just the class group, it’s different.
Anonymous says
The key there is “negative Covid test” for the kid.
Also, the fact that other people go out while sick does not make it OK for you (generic “you” here) to do so yourself. Yes, people are taking a risk when they enter a public place that sick people will be there. That doesn’t make it OK for you to knowingly bring in germs. Social contract and all that. Or does that exist anymore?
Anon says
She said her kid tested negative for Covid.
And to the broader point, no I don’t think not going out in public when your only symptom is a post-viral cough is realistic. The best thing that most people can do is take Covid tests and stay home at the beginning of an illness when they’re snotty and most infectious. I said this on the main page on a recent thread about going to work while sick, but I’ve had a cough for >6 weeks following some terrible upper respiratory infection (it sure seemed worse than a cold, but everyone in our family who had it tested negative for Covid multiple times). It’s unreasonable to expect me not to go out in public for more than a month when my only symptom is a cough that a doctor has told me is not contagious.
anon says
I would really appreciate someone with a mild cold staying home, especially if the event is indoors.
Anonymous says
Is it even a cold still? I swear, by February, every kid coughs like the smoke unfiltered cigarettes and yet I doubt that more than 10% of them would qualify as sick.
Anon says
This is definitely my kid. Sounds like a 75 year old with emphysema even when she’s not sick.
alarmed says
Honestly this thread is wild. Humans really are the dumbest species.
Anon says
Congrats on being perfect, I guess. I would literally not leave my house for about 8 months of the year if I stayed home whenever someone in my household had a mild cough. Which is problematic because I need to, you know, go to work so I can pay my mortgage and give my kids food to eat.
95% of the people in this country don’t give a shit about Covid anymore, if they ever did. Shaming the responsible 5% who are still testing, wearing masks and staying home when actively sick is counterproductive. Shame the idiots who’ve never bothered to take a test or wear a mask. They’re the real problem.
Anon says
My daughter recently turned 5 and got her first Covid vaccine this week at her 5 year appointment. (She had Covid over the summer when the vaccine for under 5 was approved. We decided to wait until she qualified for the 5-11 vaccine to get her vaccinated, since she would turn 5 about 3 months after she had Covid). The nurse gave her the wrong version of the vaccine and gave her the Pfizer bivalent Covid booster instead of the original vaccine series.
The office is telling me this isn’t a big deal, but I know that it is in their interest to downplay the error. Has anyone had this happen? My daughter seems fine but I am nervous that she isn’t getting the dosages in order (especially since this is a new vaccine). And, I am very unsettled that the office made an error in administering a vaccine.
EDAnon says
I would be unsettled by the error, too. It would make me likely switch practices. I don’t know that it is a problem. If I hadn’t been vaccinated yet, I assume I would start with the newer vaccine, not the original series.
You could contact your local Public Health and see what they recommend.
Anonymous says
I say: good on them for catching the error, admitting the error, and alerting you so you can monitor for side effects. It’s not great that it happened, but I believe that as long as there are humans, there will be human error. My sense is that any grave effects are likely to be immediate, and things like discomfort may linger, but I could live with discomfort as the worst thing.
Anon says
Why would there be “grave” effects? This booster has been given to millions of people. It’s obviously safe.
Anonymous says
I didn’t mean to suggest any, more like with anything that goes sideways, like getting dosage off by a factor of 10 (common, sadly) or switching a med entirely, the grave things tend to happen immediately. So even if 12 hours have passed uneventfully, that is actually good. It’s not like asbestosis where something horrible will happen 30 years later; anything horrible tends to happen fast. I was thinking medication errors more generally.
Aunt Jamesina says
I don’t see any fear-mongering in the comment from 9:12. “Grave effects” are very rare, but when they *do* happen, they tend to happen immediately.
Anonymous says
Yep, the purpose of the comment seems to be reassurance rather than fear-mongering.
Anon says
I agree that the fact they made a mistake is unsettling, but I wouldn’t be worried about the actual vaccine. I’d be kind of thrilled my kid got the bivalent booster. The original is pretty worthless against omicron at this point. There’s no scientific reason to get the OG vaccine first. It’s just recommended by the CDC for bureaucratic reasons.
OP says
Thank you. This is reassuring. I am very unnerved that there was any sort of error. But, I am also very concerned that she was given the vaccine in a different order than it had been tested (since she didn’t have the original doses before she got the booster).
Anon says
I don’t think that actually matters much – the net effect (that she won’t have the maximum protection until she’s had a second shot) should be the same. The primary dose isn’t different in mode of action to the booster doses.
What have they said about when she should get a second shot?
OP says
They are going to do one dose of the original vaccine in a month as her second dose.
Anon says
OP, that sounds like a good plan. I definitely understand being frustrated about the mistake but I wouldn’t worry too much about what actually happened.
Anon says
I’d switch practices.
Do they not show you the vaccine printed information on the vial before administering? Every place I’ve ever gotten a vaccine (for me or my kids) has done that.
Anon says
No one has ever shown me the vial.
Anonymous says
Same. It could be insulin or narcan or anything administered via a needle. I got a flu shot yesterday, or so I think. Ditto Rhogam. Ditto the Depo-Provera shot. I was in a vaccine trial once, I so guess I am OK trusting the system.
Anon at 9:35am says
At our pediatrician, they show us the vial (medication name, expiration date) for every vaccine and we sign an acknowledgement before they inject.
At my primary or gyn, they show me the vial (medication name, expiration date) for every vaccine, but I don’t sign anything.
This has been my experience with every doctor.
Anonymous says
Which city are you in?
I’m in a big SEUS city where most primary care practices are owned by one of two hospital systems that control most health care. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a vial here or before I moved here (10 years ago) for an adult or pediatrician visit. The longest med chat I’ve ever had was with my anesthesiologist pre-surgery.
Anon at 9:35am says
Currrently live outside NYC and otherwise have spent my entire adult life in various HCOL US cities.
Anonymous says
Most of my life has been in NJ/DC and I can’t recall ever seeing a vial close up where I could read the label. Sometimes they just bring in needles on a tray (for ped visits) vs bringing the vials around.
Another says
haven’t been shown a vial. live in Houston, and have gone to several hospitals, and previously lived in nyc. I could ask, but I haven’t
Anon says
Yeah I’m in the Midwest, but at our ped they just bring in the needles. The vial isn’t even in the room. At a pharmacist you usually see them draw from the vial but I don’t recall ever being given a close up of the label.
Anonymous says
At the pharmacies around here they tell you what vaccine you are getting right before they inject it. Sometimes they draw from the vial in front of you, but I don’t look and they have never offered to show me the vial. They usually give you a printed label with the name, manufacturer, and lot number of the vaccine.
Clementine says
Interesting! I was shown them at my daughter (2)’s vaccination appointments but now that I’m thinking – I wasn’t shown them for my own.
Mrs. Jones says
I am and have never seen a vial for any vaccine for me or my kid.
Anon says
Same
Anonymous says
Right? I see the needle go into the used sharps container and yet I don’t see where they get the needle from. I don’t actually know it’s new, but I’m comfortable assuming that it is. I’m not sure showing me the vial would help as they have some big type on them and then a lot of small words and some solution / chemical stuff. I don’t think it’s like on the coyote / roadrunner cartoons where the flu shot says “Flu Shot” in big unambiguous type and just that. As a layman, it might be more confusing than immediately apparent.
Liza says
Honestly, if you have lost trust in this practice, you should change, and only you can judge that. No amount of people on this board telling you it isn’t a big deal can change how you feel, and you have to have trust in your doctor to make it a positive and productive relationship. I’m so sorry this happened.
Anon says
My pediatrician’s office administered a vaccine that hadn’t been stored properly so was safe but had to administered again (this wasn’t covid). It was unsettling! It’s also a huge top tier practice associated with a great children’s hospital, so I’d say anyone can make a mistake.
S says
If it makes you feel slightly better our county-administered vaccine site almost put the shot in my arm not my 3 year old daughter’s shot when she got her second dose. We were both extremely unsettled by it.
Anon says
I am recently back to work with my second kid. I am feeling so stretched – there is not enough time to do my job and take care of my kids. The only thing I can see to cut to create more time is breastfeeding, so that I wouldn’t have to deal with pumping. But that makes me really sad to think about. Not sure what I’m asking for, just advice I guess.
Spirograph says
Hugs, 2nd kid was hard for me to go back to work, too… there was just a lot I felt like I was falling down on: not getting enough time with the older kid because I was nursing the baby, more “mom brain” (I know, I hate the term too, but it was real for me), never being able to recharge, and existential do-I-even-want-to-work questions.
I ended up asking for a reduced schedule and went to 32 hours, 4 days a week for a year. After that I changed employers, I’m not sure I’d ever have wanted to go back to 5 days/week otherwise. Not everyone can swing this, but if you can, it’s worth considering!
anonM says
Spirgoraph, I ended up reducing hours too! Also agree on “mom brain” — whether it is just “tired brain” or not, it is hard. There are things that happen that I just don’t remember any details about ekkkk. OP- take really good notes at work. You’re probably really tired and it will give you some comfort to have good notes to look back on!
anonM says
It’s really hard, solidarity. If you don’t feel ready to cut breastfeeding yet, don’t. But, maybe just drop a pumping session at work and supplement with formula if needed. If you have a partner, can they be responsible for doing the pump prep (bags, washing, storage, ice packs, etc.?). That was a really really tiring period for me too.
Anonymous says
Sending you virtual hugs! I am right there with you – 5 months post-partum with my 2nd, been back at work for a month. It is a hard period of time, and the way I am coping with it is to do the best I can. My baby went through a growth spurt that meant I would need to add a pumping session to keep up, and I didn’t do it (already doing 3 per day). I tapped into my freezer reserves and if we need to supplement we will. I am already planning to wean by 1 year so I tell myself it’s just a few more months. No great advice, but what is making me okay with this season of life is this list: I try to make each kid laugh at least once per day, say yes to big kid as often as I can (jump on bed, random dinner requests (usually adding a requested fruit)), and tell myself on repeat, “this too shall pass.”
Mary Moo Cow says
Commiseration. When I came back to work after my second, pumping at work was what I cut. I still nursed in the mornings and evenings and exclusively on the weekends, but between return to work and starting solid foods, I gradually stopped pumping, worked through my frozen supply and sent formula to daycare. We still had to deal with the washing something, but combo feeding really made a difference in my mental health (I loved nursing but hated pumping). Maybe consider combo feeding?
Also, what else can you outsource, even if temporarily? Hiring a house cleaner or making it weekly, grocery delivery or meal delivery, sending laundry out, calling in a babysitter occasionally for even one kid, etc. And try not to think about what you can’t change (length of your commute, for example) and instead, what you can do. It will get better…or, rather, it will look different in time and as your kids get older.
Boston Legal Eagle says
I agree with all of this. This too shall pass, OP, even if it takes a few months or even years, but it is completely normal to feel this way. 2 kids is a huge adjustment, and there is less opportunity for trade off with your partner, so it feels like you are always on. I would also try to minimize pumping at work as much as you can. I stopped pumping at work a lot earlier than I stopped b-feeding, as I kept that up in the morning and night. We outsourced laundry for a while when baby 2 was here. And cleaners. And meal delivery. And my parents to babysit.
octagon says
Same – I couldn’t handle the pumping at work, it was just too much for my body and brain as I was trying to remember how to be my professional self. Kid got formula at daycare and I still nursed at wakeup and bedtime, which was most important to me.
Anon says
This is helpful to hear, I assumed my supply would tank if I stopped pumping at work. I’m happy to use formula but would love to be able to breastfeed when I’m with baby so this could be a great option.
Liza says
It’s tough – what is your childcare situation? Why are you feeling like there’s not enough time to do your work and care for the kiddos?
ElisaR says
you’re in the deepest of the trenches right now! do whatever works for you. For me, i dropped the pump sessions when they became too much but i still bfed first thing in the morning and at night. Baby had formula the rest of the time. it worked for us and i don’t regret not pumping. pumping and me were not friends.
Anon says
Does anyone get annoyed when your kid asks for things? I feel like my daughter is constantly asking “did you buy X that you said you would ” or “I want to do a lemonade stand” or “I want you to pack me lunch instead of buying on Thursdays”. Idk why but it drives me bonkers, I guess it’s because I feel like we do so much but it’s never enough. She doesn’t whine about it or is rude about it but it still really gets to me and idk what that is about or how to handle
Clementine says
I worry constantly that my kids are going to be entitled. We do a lot around gratitude and appreciation, but part of it is that as a kid, my family wasn’t financially stable. We weren’t homeless but also qualified for free lunches. My parents were the ‘starving hippie artist’ kind of broke; however, my husband and I now both have good jobs which pay well.
My kids get to do expensive sports like ski and do things like travel. I am a believer in spending money on experiences not things, so while the kids probably have about half the toys of an average house, we went on 3 vacations last year – 2 of which involved flights. I worry all the time that they’ll grow up expecting things.
The hardest one for me is that we have someone who comes and deep cleans 1x/month. It’s for me, not the kids. The kids still do a lot of cleaning, but… every so often my kid will ask if Miss (Woman who comes) is going to clean X. I worry in general.
On the other hand, based on your example: I am glad that your daughter can advocate for herself. It will serve her well in life.
Anonymous says
I remember a Wanda Sykes routine where she says she tells her kids, “You’re not rich; I”M RICH.”
Anon says
Haha yes! I totally say this to my kid when she alludes to how much better off than others we are.
Anonymous says
I remember that joke too! We need more comedians who are parents.
Anon says
I feel this. We don’t have a lot of stuff or fancy stuff, but my kid went on more than a dozen plane trips last year, some of them in international business class. She walked on a (small) plane recently and was like “where are the lay flat seats?”and gave the flight attendants quite a chuckle. But our financial support isn’t going to continue forever so I feel like if nothing else she’s going to get a wake up call when she’s an adult. I feel like entitlement is a bigger issue when wealthy parents continue to support kids well past college, which we will not be doing. I grew up upper middle class (not as privileged as my kid, but far off) and I think I turned out ok.
Aunt Jamesina says
Yes, I also thought it sounds like your daughter is a good advocate for herself! That is awesome, even if I’m sure it can be annoying.
Spirograph says
Honestly… I didn’t do winter sports as a kid, but we did take at least two vacations a year and flew to some of them (my dad really likes road trips, otherwise it would have been more). I don’t think it’s a bad thing to grow up accustomed to a certain lifestyle, kids just need to understand what that lifestyle costs and decide whether they want to put in the work to maintain it when they’re responsible for their own financial lives. Not a conversation to have with preschoolers, of course, but by middle or high school, for sure.
Boston Legal Eagle says
I worry about this too. I grew up immigrant poor, although my parents are doing well now. My kids have the life I always dreamed of – big house, nice neighborhood, activities, trips, toys, etc. But to them, this is normal. And husband and I worked hard to provide this for them! I have to constantly remind myself that it’s normal for a 6 year old and 4 year old to sound incredibly selfish and entitled to my adult ears, with all of my perspective. I hope we can teach them gratitude somehow, even with their comfortable lives.
Anon says
I came from an upper middle class background (parents were professionals but not super highly paid ones) and married a rich guy (big law partner but a very highly paid one), and I worry about this a ton. Between our family and my tween stepkids’ even-wealthier mom, they’re used to flying in the front of the plane (not always, but a few times a year), seeing teenagers get a new Range Rover when they turn 16, belonging to really pricey country club, etc. They have flown on private jets, even, with their mom. They don’t really understand how privileged they are (although we try to explain), and there’s a sense that any minor discomfort can be smoothed away with money. My husband and I are trying to help them understand that, and to avoid this with the children we share, who are still preschool age, because it’s troubling and doesn’t set them up well in life.
AwayEmily says
I get annoyed by constant requests, too — not necessarily for the “entitled” reason but just because it’s super irritating. Especially when it’s seemingly ridiculous requests like “I’m scared to go to the bathroom upstairs by myself, can you come with me while I poop” or “I want you to find the drawing I brought home from school eight days ago.” I try to tell myself that it is just really HARD to be a kid. It’s hard to have a lot of strong desires but be largely dependent on other people for meeting those desires. I try to imagine what it would be like if I had to ask my husband every time I wanted to eat something or change plans. It would suck. When I can get myself in that perspective it’s a bit easier to be patient.
Anon says
I agree with this. It doesn’t necessarily read entitled to me, but I find the repeated questions really annoying. I’ve started saying “asked and answered” to my kid like I’m a lawyer objecting in court, ha.
Spirograph says
Yes and no… I get more annoyed that my husband often buys the things they ask for. Both DH and I grew up in families that were financially secure, it’s just that our parents had very different ideas about spending that we’ve inherited. Like, my husband will get hot dogs and cotton candy and drinks in souvenir cups at a sporting event, and now my kids expect & ask for those types of things. If I take the kids somewhere, we eat before we go or pack snacks, and I might let them look at the gift store, but we’re not buying anything. They’ve picked up on this difference — my daughter now only wants DH to take her to ice skating practice because he will buy her stuff from the vending machine, and I won’t.
Anonymous says
Vending machine and snacks at events are two of my greatest life joys. Like I used to have to think about not spending that $ and cannot tell you how liberating it is to know that it is OK. I go to one ball game a year and a few hockey games and get sincere joy out of finding a good vending machine. My kids went to a summer camp at a university and they got let loose in the vending machine area and had insane happiness at their good fortune.
I do not get all the treats, but I think a treat is something you look back on and don’t regret.
Anon says
I agree with this. When I was a kid, my super fatphobic parents wouldn’t let me get a small multicolored lollipop at Disneyland, even though it was legitimately the thing I wanted most there. Every other similar treat in life was policed the same way. It was really sad for my six-year-old self! Then I went back to Disneyland in my early teens with a friend’s family and we got cotton candy, Dole Whips, AND the lollipop. None of it broke the bank, but it added so much to the enjoyment of the day to not hear “no” to everything. I’m a big believer in treats, especially special ones that you can’t get just anywhere. OP, I get that the vending machine probably doesn’t quite meet that mark for you, but still…
Anonymous says
I just had this conversation with my husband the other day. I grew up in a family that smuggled sandwiches into Disneyland, packed picnics for rest stops on road trips, only took vacations at a campground that had no running water, and never bought souvenirs. His rich parents always bought the hot dog and peanuts and soda so these things aren’t exciting to him. I get a huge amount of enjoyment from buying the snack once in a while, but I do try to make sure it’s a treat and not an expected thing. Now that I’ve had years of being able to buy food wherever I please, I have gotten over it some and will pack lunch when the food wherever we’re going is not only overpriced but also terrible, but woe to anyone who tries to deny me a cider doughnut at the apple orchard. The adjustment for my husband has been that we aren’t rich like his parents and he worries that spending any money at all will mean we can’t pay for college or retire because he doesn’t comprehend how normal upper-middle-class people can possibly afford anything. It’s all relative.
Anon says
I grew up upper middle class but my parents are very frugal and never let us have small luxuries like hotel room service. To this day, ordering room service is one of my favorite things to do.
Spirograph says
Yes, this is me exactly. My dad was a highly paid professional, we just didn’t ever really indulge like that. I don’t have as strict of a prohibition as my parents did and I do love the occasional room service, or cotton candy at a sports event… I just don’t say yes every time an opportunity presents itself. I never stop my husband from doing it, but I default to frugality out of habit.
Anon says
Sounds exactly like our house. I grew up like you did and my DH like your DH.
Anonymous says
Omg the buying snacks thing is a 15 year disagreement in my marriage at this point. I had to let it go. It drives me nuts my spouse will stop and buy himself a milkshake treat, or that he wants to buy food at the airport or stop for fast food on a road trip, but I have had to LET IT GO. It’s one of the only places I get antsy about being the primary breadwinner because yo me those things are not important and are wastes of money, but he gets a lot of joy from that and there are other things I spend money on that he wouldn’t.
Anonymous says
Most of this sounds like he actually needs to eat? Or do you mean you’d rather he pack food from home for the airport and road trips?
Anonymous says
Oh not disputing needing to eat at all!! But I would prefer we bring food from home.
Anon says
Ha this is a tangent but I hate lemonade stands. I’m trying to teach my kids not to waste money on overpriced things we don’t need…like $1 for an oz of lemonade when there’s lemonade in our fridge. In days of old when kids built the stand, bought the supplies, set it up and sold it with zero parental involvement, okkkk maybe I can see supporting their initiative. Or if you’re out for a run and really thirsty, great, it’s meeting a genuine need. But many lemonade stands seem to be another parent-facilitated activity to entertain kids and I’m not paying for that (yep, I’m a curmudgeon.)
Anonymous says
My kid tried to sell her art on the sidewalk on a hot and sunny day. It as so precious and she was shy to even try to approach the one pedestrian who came by in an hour. She was . . . 5? And she is actually good at drawing and hilarious. I get it for free, but I would spend a lemonade-stand budget on some good kid art.
Anonymous says
My kid (2nd grader) wanted to do one and I made her basically write a business plan. We researched the price of lemons and sugar and cups (by going to the grocery store with a notebook) and did some math to figure out how much lemonade she would have to sell to break even at different price points. She then had to go to my partner and apply for a “loan” for startup costs for the business. It was actually fun and pretty educational I think! We do live in a residential area of a city so lots of people walking past who thought it was cute and bought a cup.
Anonymous says
This is a wonderful learning experience and exactly the kind of thing I have no energy for.
Spirograph says
This. I vouch for wonderful learning experience, I still remember my mom did something similar with me and my sister. We had a “Lemonade and Cookies” stand one summer when there was construction to put in a bike trail near our house. We baked an assortment of cookies, mixed up Country Time lemonade and did brisk business with the construction workers. I loved it and simultaneously cannot imagine doing it with my own kids. (also, we do not have anywhere near enough foot traffic past our house on a dead-end street)
I am with the husband of anonymous at 1:53, below. Despite my ingrained frugality, I always patronize kid-run lemonade stands. I also buy fundraiser stuff from any kid who is actually knocking on doors to sell it.
Anonymous says
One of my husband’s rules for life is that if you see a lemonade stand, like a real genuine kid-run one, you must stop and patronize it. I think this is a good rule.
Anon says
+1. I can afford to spend $2 on this.
Anonymous says
It drives me crazy too. It’s not necessarily even that they are greedy or entitled, it’s that they just have zero perspective and have no idea how much work it is to do whatever they wanted on top of all the other things I have to do. The thing they wanted at the store might be a totally reasonable request I was going to fulfill, like bananas for the lunch box instead of apples. They asked for it last night and today seems like so long to wait, but I only go to the store on Saturdays. Etc.
Liza says
Sometimes. I think it helps to be frank with them sometimes. Like if my daughter asks me to play with her, and I don’t want to, I’ll be honest and say something like, “Kids like to play with toys; grown ups like to read our books or watch shows. So you go ahead and do the kid stuff, but I’m not going to do that with you right now.” Or when it comes to something like a lemonade stand or packing lunch, I could see saying something like: “I’m not going to do that for you but if you want to do it yourself, go for it!” Regarding did you buy X – well, did you, and if not why not, just give the reason, even if it’s, I’ve been busy and haven’t gotten around to it yet.
So Anon says
Yes, I feel you on this. For me, it’s less about a concern that I think my kids are entitled, but more that OMG let me sit down and rest ever. I feel like I am constantly attending to others, whether that is work or my kids, and the moment I sit down is when I get the request to go do a craft, go somewhere, follow-up about the form (that is already sign and in the back-pack), or whatever. My son loves coming up with business ideas, and I’ve learned to just say yes and see where it goes. My daughter loves to do crafts, and I do not. I feel like I am constantly giving and doing, and it is completely exhausting. OP – I’m not sure if this is what you’re feeling. If so, I’m right there with you. I don’t have an answer except that I shut myself in my room for an hour on the weekend to watch tv, nap or read in peace and quiet.
Anon says
So in response to some of the other questions, I grew up wealthy, and now have less. Which was a choice! And it’s fine! Sometimes I worry that my kids aren’t getting quite as many opportunities as I did, but they’re getting plenty. I am probably a more messy adult than if I hadn’t had a full-time housekeeper growing up. But I think DH would say I’m pretty chill and grounded all things considered. So I promise, you’re not necessarily messing up your kids. You’re giving them good experiences or giving them things you want to give them, and then they can become adults and decide what kind of life they want to live and give to their own kids!
Anonymous says
Hmm. My initial reaction to your post was “welcome to having kids.” My kids ask for shit all the time.
But after thinking on it more, I think I occasionally see some of the behavior you are probably finding annoying. With my kids, I either have them make a list or pick a date so it just isn’t “ can we….” Eg. You want to do a lemonade stand? Ok. Make a list of what we need. Pick a day. Put it on the calendar.
You want to bring vs buy on Thursdays? Help mom remember. Make a post it. Or, mom can’t make lunches on Thursdays but tell me what you’d like to have and I’ll put it on the shopping list and YOU can pack lunches.
Anon says
I think you’re applying an adult perspective to a tiny child – they don’t really have the developmental ability or perspective you’re looking for. And I hear the concerns about entitlement but that’s pretty different than wanting to do an activity like have a lemonade stand. It’s absolutely fine to say no to things but being annoyed that your young child has wants is a little off.
Anonymous says
No, it’s not “off” to be annoyed by constant requests. You can recognize that it’s developmentally appropriate and still find it absolutely exhausting.
Anon says
+1 I feel this way about lots of kid behaviors.
GCA says
Extremely minor, but I swear the grass is always greener: we always pack leftovers for lunches (and have since my kids started solids at daycare) and my second-grader is constantly begging to eat school lunch! (Can anyone who has actually eaten a pizza Lunchable and lived to tell the tale, let me know if they are any good? I’m sure they are very exciting if you’re in second grade.)
Unpacking this question a bit, I think there are several things going on.
One is that kids really do not notice the emotional and physical labor that parents put in to keep everyone fed and the household running. I think having a kid make a business plan to set up the lemonade stand is an awesome learning experience and a way for them to practice noticing the mental load, but it’s also a question of, do you have enough spare capacity as a working parent to train them to notice the mental load. (It’s like taking on interns at work to help, but never having enough time to train them so they can’t help properly.)
The other part is anxiety about all of our formative childhood experiences and attitudes around money and privilege and being handed things when you ask for them (or not, for whatever reasons — your family couldn’t afford the money or time, your family preferred a more frugal lifestyle, etc). DH and I for various reasons are more frugal on some things (we pack sandwiches for road trips and I can nearly always talk myself out of getting an iced coffee) and splurgy on others (nice camping gear, travel, pony rides at the Renaissance faire). I don’t yet know how to explain our perspective to the kids but more importantly, teach them how to weigh and make their own choices and be grateful for what they do have.
Anonymous says
Pizza lunchables are gross, and my kids love them. but seriously, gross. the bread thing is a weird texture, the cheese is so covered in anti-clumping stuff that it doesn’t taste like cheese, and the sauce is watery and pathetic. the pepperonis are the only thing that resembles the actual food it represents. I took one bite, and never again.
Anon says
When do kids start playing dress up? When I was a kid we had an awesome costume trunk, and there are cute costumes for sale this time of year. LO is definitely still too young (although he’s going trick’r’treating in a pumpkin suit), but I’m just curious if that kind of play is like a toddler thing or a school age thing?
Anon says
For my kids, ages 3-5 was the sweet spot for “career” type costumes – fireman, police officer, construction worker. Now that they are a little older they are getting into more superhero/character costumes. They still don’t play with them a ton, so we have a minimal collection, but they are fun every now and then.
Anon says
I would say it started around 2.5 for my kid, although to be honest she’s never shown a ton of interest in the costumes. She’ll play firefighter but not use the firefighter stuff we have. She has a very vivid (read: overactive) imagination so I guess maybe she feels like she doesn’t need the physical stuff.
AwayEmily says
Yeah, I might wait to see if she is into dressing up (maybe ask daycare if she uses their dress-up stuff?). My kids were never particularly interested in dressing up — they would more use accessories to play pretend, like if they were playing doctor they’d use the doctor set, or if they were playing teacher they’d set up couch cushions for circle time. But I know other kids LOVE dressing up. And it is super cute to see.
Mary Moo Cow says
Both these comments are reassuring to me, as I have two kids who were meh on dress up in costumes. Mine also use accessories and my little one, especially, crafts these elaborate pretend play scenarios.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Mine don’t really do dress up. Older one is more into building things, like elaborate legos or magnatiles, and younger one is into creative play, but more with tea sets, food, etc.
Liza says
Honestly my kids never really played dress up at home. I kept waiting for it to happen and they were just never that interested. But yeah I think preschool is the time it typically starts, once they can start putting clothes on and off without help.
Anonymous says
My 8 and 11 year olds still use the dress up box sometimes. Although the 11 year old is mostly humouring the 8 year old. Great costumes and a range of pieces/sizes are key. Like sometimes ‘dressing up’ is putting on the cow hat for some kind of farm tag they invented. Costume pieces that are quick to put on like capes/wands/hats/wings (dragon, butterfly, airplane) seem to get the most use.
I also encouraged imaginative dress up play a lot when they were younger so I think it’s just something they are used to playing.
Anonymous says
Ours started around 2. We have a very large costume basket but it’s mostly random goodwill stuff we see that looks like you could make cool containers with it- we don’t usually buy “costumes” except hats. Lots of hats, fake fur vest, velvet hooded cape, other capes, cowboy and pirate type boots. Started to some degree at 2 but the kids are 4 and 7 and there is some amount of dress up play every single day.
Anonymous says
So for example they put on police hats snd random vests yesterday to play parking inspector, or make cowboy costumes to play rodeo, and there is a lot of postal service play happening with totally unrelated costume pieces they insist are for deliverymen.
Anonymous says
My DD was 3.5 when she started, it took off at 4, and she’s still very into it at 5.5. They need to be able to dress themselves easily for it to be fun. One of my favorite things is when all the girl cousins come over (ages 2-8) and they all dress up. I love Little Adventurers and Sarah’s Silks (the butterfly wings, veil, and cape). I don’t regret any money we’ve spent on dress up clothes. But some kids are not into it at all.
Isabella says
I’m considering professional family photos for the first time ever. I would hire someone and go to an outdoor location, rather than the mall-studio style. Can anyone fill me in on how it usually works, in terms of time and pricing? My only reference point is wedding photography.
Anon says
Huge variation. In some places there are decent photographers who will do a mini session and give you a couple of edited images for $200. We pay our photographer an insane to me amount (~$2k, which I’m pretty sure is more than we spent on our wedding), but she’s super talented, we always love the photos and there is no one in our area who takes better photos than I do and charges less than $500. So the investment is worth it to us.
Anon says
And time-wise the session is about an hour. You’re mainly paying for the editing time.
Anonymous says
I find it really depends on the photographer. For the person we use, she has one price for a 30 minute session that is in an outdoor location that she chooses. A one-hour session is more expensive but also more flexible regarding location. Kids are infant and 2 so we did the 30 minute session. Not all photographers have prices on their website, so there can be a lot of emailing at first. I would first think about how long your kids can be cooperative. When our daughter was 1, we did an hour, and it was 40 minutes of mostly wasted time. Even at 2, her attention span was maybe 20 minutes. So to me, the timing would be the first step — then you can tell photographers you’re looking for a 30 minutes session or whatever is best for you.
Anon says
I would say ballpark about $500-700 dollars for a shoot and a moderate amount of images/editing. I had been considering it for this fall but balked at the price when I started looking around…my husband really hates having his photo taken and thinks paying money for it is nuts, so I decided to wait until I’m sure my family is complete before I push on this one. (I know photographers deserve to be paid well for their service so not complaining. Just not a budget item for us right now!)
In the meantime I had my sister take some snaps of us with a nice background; they aren’t quite good enough for the wall, but they capture our family in the moment :)
Mary Moo Cow says
My go-to family photographer does fall mini sessions (expressly for holiday cards) that are 15 minutes, include 20 edited images, and cost $150. Her half hour sessions include about 30 images and cost about $175/$200. She can also do an hour, but I have found that’s too much time, unless you have a huge group (we had three branches of the family and still had time leftover in the past.) We get photos done a few times a year, one casual/candid session at our house and one formal posed session for holiday cards.
Check the photographer’s portfolio and ask around if you’re nervous. If the prices aren’t published, don’t be shy about asking, and make sure you get the details. My photog spells it all out on the website, but friends have been hit with a shock at the end that the fee was only for sitting and edited images would be extra.
Lydia says
we just did them through Shoott (it’s some kind of photography booking startup)… you can buy just a few images for I think $20 each, or get the full set for around $200. We ended up getting all the images (digital) + holiday cards (paper) for I think $270, which seems like a good deal. I didn’t get to pick the photographer but was super impressed with her work, and it felt like less of a shakedown than some of the fall family photoshoots (which are also sometimes toooo basic, at least here in the SEUS).
Anonymous says
We’re doing an hour with someone this weekend for $600. We did it once before for about the same price. Find someone with a great portfolio who specializes in families. A real pro will also do things like send you a survey in advance so that they can understand which photos in their portfolio most captured your eye, whether you like your photos silly or soulful, what makes your kids laugh, etc etc. Make sure you sign a contract that lays out exactly what you’re getting in terms of images and editing.
Anon says
Here is a fun question for today, I am pregnant with our first. Years ago, my partner and I thought it would be great if we named our first after our mothers’ maiden names. His mother’s maiden name (and his middle name) is Taylor and would be the first name of our child. My mother’s is another Irish surname that would be fine for a middle but is not first name appropriate. Now that the due date is real and coming closer, I am worried. My husband is a huge Swiftie. Everyone knows it, he goes to multiple tour locations, he took today off to be able to listen to Midnights at midnight. I like Ms. Swift, but I do not want her influence to be perceived as naming my child and it takes away from the honoring of our moms.
What would you do? Should I push for another name, drop Taylor to a middle and use my family’s name for a future child?
Spirograph says
Do you like the name Taylor on its own merits or as honoring family? If so, I wouldn’t change your plan. My cousin’s name is Andre and he was born right around the time there was a really popular movie called Andre about a seal. I remember my aunt being worried people would think she named her son after the seal. I would be shocked if anyone remembers that movie exists, now! :)
Not that I think Taylor Swift will fall out of cultural relevance any time soon, but if you gently correct people “no, it’s a family name” a few times, then everyone who knows your husband well enough to know he’s a Swiftie will have it straight. Passing acquaintances and people your daughter meets throughout her own life will likely never make that assumption to begin with.
Mary Moo Cow says
I went to a Ryan Adams concert when I was 9 months pregnant and our seatmates asked us about baby names, and then introduced their daughter, Ryan. DH did not clock the connection. This is just to say that some people might infer a connection, but not everyone will.
Clementine says
First, this is fantastic. I totally see the dilemma!
I personally would try and get both of you to come together with a list of names and have Taylor be the middle. I think that’s a really nice balance. I would also directly tell him, ‘I will never live it down if everyone thinks you named our child after Taylor Swift’.
And now I will start throwing out random girls’ names in no particular order: Camille, Margaret, Zora, Cora/Nora.
Liza says
What do you WANT to do? What does your husband think?
Anonymous says
Hahhhahahahahha
Anon says
This is definitely one of the most entertaining questions posted here!
Anon on this one says
My daughter is named Fiona, because I loved the name when a friend had the name! It’s not after Shrek, but I get asked that a lot. I doesn’t bother me (yet) and I’m hoping that it won’t bother her either (and the movies will be outdated for her friends, so I think it’d be more of an issue of friends’ parents asking her). My son has a name with several nicknames, one of which I can’t stand. Think, Richard and Dick. When people try to call him Dick, I quickly say “he goes by Richard or Rich, thanks.” Most people drop it quickly. Same with Fiona — people don’t call her Princess Fiona or go on about Shrek, at least in front of me. And I mostly have avoided people calling her “FiFi” and instead call her “Fi” for short. If it’s going to annoy you every time, though, don’t do it because it WILL come up! On the other hand, Ms. Swift isn’t a terrible reference point and not an ogre lol. TLDR; do what you want because you and LO will be dealing with the name for a long time so you better love it!
Anon says
Aww I love the name Fiona. My main association is with the Cincinnati Zoo hippo but I would think that’s a plus for little kids and most adults like wouldn’t make that association. I have a Sofia we call Fee.
Fiona's Mom says
Thanks! My kids LOVE the books about the hippo Fiona. Such sweet messages too – the one we have is about how Fiona the Hippo just keep trying until she got whatever skill!
Also, I never thought about “Sofia” and “Fiona” sounding similar, but we have a Sophia in the family and sometimes people switch the names. Love Fee as a nickname, so cute.
Anon says
I think Shrek is disappearing from the conversation fast. None of my kids friends have seen it. I honestly thought you were going ot mention Fiona Apple. I also know three little Fionas, so that might be part of it too…
Anon says
Yeah I haven’t heard anyone mention Shrek in a decade or more.
Anonymous says
because of the MIL connection I think it’s fine to go with Taylor. It’s not like an unusual name that people think of only in relation to the singer.
Anon says
Hahaha I love everything about this. Tell him hi from another Swiftie who was awake at 1 am listening! But Taylor is a common enough name I don’t think it’s a big deal.
An.On. says
Unless your mother’s maiden name is Swift (which, it’s not, right??) I think you’re fine with Taylor as a first name. However, if you hate it now, you have the right to say no.
Anonymous says
Hahahaha amazing. I’d go for it and just say it’s for your MIL if you’re asked – because it is! Maybe add a “it worked out well for DH’s musical taste, har har.”
Anonymous says
Consideration:
If you have more than one child, will your other children have equally special names?
We have 3 girls. Our first was our “perfect name” we spent months researching. Our second got a family name. Our third….just got a name.
Anon says
Ours are that way too except our first was a family name, our second was family inspired, and our third… just got a name, but that maybe makes it our favorite! It’s the only name it feels like we truly picked out!
Anon says
Not quite the same thing, but when my husband and I were dating we picked out a name we both loved. It was a fairly popular name at the time, but not crazy popular. Over the intervening 15 years, the name got insanely popular and was the #1 girls name in the US for many years. I wanted to pick a less common name, because I didn’t want our kid to be one of three people in her class with that name. But my husband was really opposed because he had such a strong sentimental attachment to that name. We gave the kid that name and now she’s 5 and I can’t imagine her being anything else. She so far doesn’t mind having to use her last initial sometimes. I think you should stick with what you like and not worry about external forces unless it’s something really extreme. Like if your last name is anything that starts with the “swift” sound, don’t name your kid Taylor. But anything else other than that is fine IMO.
Anonymous says
If you really like the name, I wouldn’t worry too much. Its association with Ms. Swift will fade as your daughter takes ownership of the name in your brain. My husband was originally against our daughter’s name because his family had once had a dog by the same name. As soon as we had our daughter, Sadie the dog and Sadie our daughter became completely separate in his brain and it’s like he doesn’t even remember that their names are the same.
If you aren’t totally in love with the name, though, the T. Swift association is sufficient to veto it.
NYCer says
This is my thought as well. If you really love the name, use it and don’t worry about the Swift connection.
People who meet your daughter for the first time via school or other activities will have no idea your husband is a Taylor Swift fan.
If you are iffy about the name in general, then this is a perfect “excuse” to bump it to the middle name.
Anon says
My twins got this toy last year for Hannukah at age 3.5 and almost a year later it’s still a bit! Unrelated – how do I get my now 4 year old to stop picking her nose. She used to bite her fingernails and seems to have replaced that habit with this, but this is soooo gross to me, aside from the fact it’s not hygenic and it’s starting to make her nose bleed
Anonymous says
Thank you. I was coming here today specifically to ask how to get kids to stop picking their nose. Both of them do it, 4 year old constantly, and it is sooooooo gross. Unfortunately my partner is not as grossed out (still picks their nose too more than I think is ok… have had to abandon this fight.)
anon in brooklyn says
I’m hoping that their peers will socially shame them into stopping nose picking at some point.
anonM says
My kids still do this, of course, but when DS went through an especially gross stage I tried to be really consistent about making him get a tissue then go and wash his hands. It became annoying enough to him that he isn’t SO bad about it now (or hides it better).
Anonymous says
I try super hard to do that but there are times it’s logistically challenging, like in the car or during bedtime stories when half asleep.
anonM says
Oh for sure! And just to be clear, I’m not saying I do it all the time consistently, more that when it got really bad, for like a week we tried to be obnoxiously consistent about the handwashing. Parenthood, so glamorous!
Anon says
We’re not doing many new Hanukkah gifts this year because my 4.5 year old is getting a big gift in the form of my old American Girl doll, but I may need to get this set for a little something fun and new. She is a weirdo who loves the dentist!
Mary Moo Cow says
My now 7 year old went through an intense nose picking phase around 5.5-6.5. It tapered off gradually, but I would have paid big money for a silver bullet solution. We always, always, always pointed it out to her and told her to stop when we noticed (it seemed to be a nervous habit, like picking cuticles, but sometimes was because she had a blockage), and praised her when she wasn’t doing it (like, “hey, you haven’t picked your nose once during this story!”) We also enforced the connection between picking your nose till it bleeds means I’m going to squirt saline into your nose, and she hated that. Ultimately, it was peer pressure that really got her stop, I think.
tweens says
Help me to parent a tween. It’s all new to me. I am really struggling with attitude – eye roll, and just general look of unhappiness if anything is not perfectly going her way/sibling is annoying/etc. How do you manage the emotion number it does on you and how do you handle? I miss having toddlers!
Anonymous says
Ugh, mine is 9 and she’s already there. When she’s in a good place, we talk a lot about kindness and apologizing. I try and model both and make a point that parents have to apologize too.
I am also honest with her when she hurts my feelings or makes me upset with her behavior. My dad parented me this way and it was extremely effective. I grew up thinking of him as a person with feelings and even when I was being obnoxious I felt bad about it. My mom on the other hand, was a yeller and “because-I-say-so”er and we….are not close.
Anonymous says
Mantra for myself: “this is a normal phase of development.”
Mary Moo Cow says
WaPo parenting just had an article about this and mentioned a new book: Congrats — You’re Having a Teen! I mentally bookmarked it to check out. The gist of the article was to try to remind yourself over and over that it is not about you and try to let it roll off your back and be emphatic. How in the world anyone manages that on a daily basis, I don’t know.
avocado says
Mom of teen here. The phrases “you must be polite” and “try again” are heard frequently in our house.
Anonymous says
At the risk of becoming a broken record, I will recommend the book “Untangled” by Lisa Damour. It is the closest thing that exists to a guidebook for raising tween and teen girls.
Anonymous says
Just got an email from the elem school music teacher titled “great news!”
The news is that the COVID ban on recorders has been lifted and kids in both 3rd and 4th grade will be getting them this year.
Hoping y’all have better news ;).
Anon says
Hahaha. The recorder is annoying for parents but fun for kids. I am so tone deaf to the point that multiple elementary school music teachers didn’t let me sing, so the recorder was the high point of my music education.
Anonymous says
I sure hope the teacher meant this ironically. I don’t even know any kids who enjoy recorder class. It is painfully boring for both musical and non-musical kids, just for different reasons. Even Orff instruments (to whose lovely sound I was subjected last weekend, as accompaniment to some off-key shouting) are better than recorder.
Anonymous says
Fun fact: Orff is the one responsible for introducing recorder as a school instrument.
Clementine says
Hahaha! Well, if you want to feel better: my 2 year old has a recorder from her speech therapist to help her practice pushing air through her mouth. It’s coming after a series of whistles.
So yes – I 100% relate.
So Anon says
Oof. I think I have a different notion of what constitutes good news.
When it became clear in the spring of 2020 that the closing of schools was not a 2 week, temporary thing, our schools prepared take-home bags for the kids. Included in the bag for my then 4th grader was his recorder. What in the… was the school thinking.
Anonymous says
lol, thanks for the snort laugh. my 4th grader was in a private school last year where recorders we’re not a thing, but our public school-attending neighbor in 3rd grade had a recorder which she played OUTDOORS, mere yards from my windows, for weeks. I hope that means we missed our own recorder year, because we’re back in public school, now…
Anonymous says
We sent out a birthday invite for DS this week and a few days later, the class moms sent out an invite for an outing that will take place the same weekend. We’re required by school to invite the whole class to birthdays, so this means two class events in one weekend. Is it just me, or is this kind of rude? I’m pretty annoyed, actually. They’ve had plenty of open weekends to plan something, and they choose the one of our party? I’m not sure if there’s much we can do in this situation, but does anyone else find this odd? Add’l context: almost everyone in the class has a winter/ spring birthday, so it’s not like there have been other parties filling up the calendar until now.
Anon says
I’d be kind of annoyed too. Hopefully most people will prioritize the birthday over the class event? I would.
Anon says
it seems likely that the date of the event was chosen prior to sending the invite if there was only a few days difference. if they are on different days, why can’t people go to both?
NYCer says
What is the class outing? If it is just something like a meet up at a playground, could you reach out to the class moms and see if it would be possible to do the outing another weekend? I don’t think it would be weird for them to send an email saying, oops looks like it is already X’s bday party that weekend, so we are going to reschedule the class outing for another date. If it is something that requires reservations, that would be harder to change.
anonM says
Same weekend but not same day or time? I would let it go. Who knows why the class moms picked the same weekend, but this doesn’t seem worth your mental energy.
Anon says
I just had my (slightly overdue) women’s health exam and my doctor found a lump. It’s small, she said 1 cm or so. She didn’t seem super concerned and said it feels benign but I have to have a mammogram and ultrasound to investigate it further. I know that the odds this is cancer are low, and even if it is cancer I’ll probably survive but it’s hard not to think about worst case scenarios. I’m only 35 and have little kids and I know breast cancer is more aggressive in younger women. Anyone been through something similar and have reassuring anecdotes?
Anon says
Went through the exact same thing at your age and it was completely benign! It was a scary week or so but all worked out. How soon do they have your scheduled for the scans?
Anon says
Thanks! Tuesday at 9 am, so I don’t have to wait long, although I have to admit the rush to schedule the exam freaked me out a bit. I have yearly ultrasounds to monitor a thyroid nodule and they’re super blase about scheduling those, like “oh yeah we can get you in sometime in the next three months, maybe sooner if someone cancels.” So the priority scheduling was a bit disconcerting.
Anonymous says
I went through the same thing in my early 20s. The faster they can get you in for the scans, the faster you can be done with the whole thing.
An.On. says
I had this happen a few years ago, when I was your age, and it was absolutely terrifying, especially since my mother was at the time recovering from breast cancer, but it turned out totally fine. Luckily I only had two days in between discovery and the mammogram/results, so I did it without falling apart at my desk, but I don’t think my boss ever knew why I had such an attitude that day. All I wanted to do was go home and cry, and instead I was voluntold to go on a last minute client visit. But I’m perfectly fine, and my mother is fine, and you’ll get through this too.
So Anon says
Yes, I’ve been through it – multiple times now that I think about it. I’m totally fine (never actually cancer). It is scary, even when you know the odds are in your favor. My advice is to be kind to yourself over the next few days.
Colorado says
TW – I took a pregnancy test yesterday and their was a faint second line. Any stories of the faint line turning stronger over coming days?
Anon says
Where are you in your cycle? If it’s before your missed period, this is normal and the line will get darker. If you’re a week past when your period was due it’s more likely to be a false positive or miscarriage. Hugs.