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Sales of note for 5.5.24
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Kid/Family Sales
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Paging Lancaster, PA from yesterday says
I forgot to mention yesterday – if you the schedule aligns, check out a Lancaster Barnstormers baseball game. They’re so fun, inexpensive, and clean. There’s a playground there, too, so kids can burn off steam as much as needed.
Anon says
Thanks!!
Anon says
I was recruited and have been told to expect an offer for a great opportunity that will pull from my skills and experience, will expand my exposure in my field to related lines of work, and will allow me to work frequently and closely with the c-suite of a F500 company. Also, pays more! This is great! But, I’m currently on maternity leave for a job I truly love — I have a fantastic manager and friends there and I love my clients. I was planning to go back to my job in a couple of weeks but new job would start in about a month.
1) I should take this job regardless of being on leave, right? I know the answer is yes but the optics of leaving my current company on leave seem not great.
2) Do I/did I have a responsibility to disclose I am currently on maternity leave at my current role?
3) Should I give notice to my job now and not go back, or should I go back and basically immediately tell them I’m leaving? I don’t really have anything to tie up as I have been on leave for a few months. I guess any closure at my job would probably be for my benefit only, right?
4) any scripts for sharing this news with my company? Do I need to do anything differently because I was on leave?
Anon. says
1) Yes, absolutely. Congratulations!
2) No, your health information is none of their business
3) Read your leave policy closely and/or reach out to HR with a hypothetical if you don’t have a trusted contact there. Some policies are written so that you are required to repay certain benefits if you don’t come back from leave for at least one day.
NYCer says
+1. If you want this new job, then yes you should absolutely take it. But like Anon. said, I would definitely review your current company’s policy for quitting while on maternity leave.
Anon says
There will be some people who will be annoyed that you left while on leave, but that’s not a reason to pass up an opportunity that you would otherwise take. Leave is an earned benefit, you already did the work to get it. Congratulations!
Anon says
(1) so i would say the answer is yes! if that is what you want and only you can know that. you sound super excited about it! idk if this is your first baby, how much sleep you’re getting, etc., but just remembering that when you are new you have to build up your reputation and are you in a place to do that coming back from maternity leave. these are not reasons not to take it, but just things to keep in mind
(2) you don’t have responsibility to disclose before you receive the offer, but i would think you might mention it after you accept? or not so much that you are on maternity leave, but presumably as you get to know your new colleagues, people mention things about their families? obviously you don’t have to and i know you dont want to be mommy tracked, but i wouldn’t go out of you way to hide it
(3) my only question/issue I see for this is if you get health insurance through your current job and if you get it to the end of the month, etc.
(
Anonymous says
Re. #2, I don’t see a responsibility to disclose that you are on maternity leave at the offer stage unless you need to justify a later start date.
That said, if after you started in the new job you tried to conceal the fact that you had an infant, it would be super weird. You don’t have to advertise it or formally announce it, but if I were your boss or co-worker and I found out that you had been actively concealing the existence of a family in casual conversation, etc., I’d think you were shifty and manipulative and would be on my guard around you professionally and personally.
anon says
I started new jobs post-maternity leave twice. I didn’t disclose during the interview/offer/acceptance stage with either. But I did have to disclose before I started for both companies. For #1 I needed a lock on my associate office so I could pump and with #2 I needed a pumping break during the 8-hour orientation session.
Anonymous says
Just a PSA that I tried cooking salmon in the air fryer last night and it was great! 10 minutes at 395 degrees, with a little maple syrup and soy sauce on top. Line the basket with foil if your air fryer is basket-style.
Anon says
*crickets*
Pull up allergy? says
Anyones kid had a reaction to pull ups compared to diapers? Kiddo is nearly 2 and we’ve been introducing them occasionally. I bought a pack this weekend and he developed an awful rash that spread all over his body. We are pretty sure it’s the pull up because when we put him in the diaper it went away and flared back up the next day with the pull up again.
Diapers and pull ups are target brand. I’m thinking about trying a different brand in a few days when the rash calms down.
Anon says
No, but we never used pull-ups and just used diapers until she was fully potty-trained. They’re not necessary IMO.
anon says
We found pullups really helpful for our heavy sleeper. She was working on being dry overnight, with trips to the potty, but wasn’t successful at it for a long while. We never used them for daytime.
Anon says
Fair. I have a weird kid who was dry at night before she was willing to use the potty, so we didn’t really separate day and night training.
Anonymous says
My kid got much worse diaper rash in pull ups than diapers. I agree with the previous poster that they’re not really necessary.
Anonymous says
I would go so far as to say that pull-ups can be counterproductive. They feel like a diaper so it seems OK to go in them. To prevent messes during the early stages of potty training, I put a diaper over the underwear.
Anon says
As a counter-point, I had two kids who clearly recognized pull-ups as being different from diapers and always kept them dry. Their daycare put them in pull-ups for walks to the playground (10 min from the center) the first few weeks they were potty-training, because they didn’t want to have to bring the whole class back in case of an accident. We also used them for plane trips until ages 3.5 or so, because then it was easy to have the kids pee independently but we had a backup plane if they got desperate when the seatbelt sign was on and we couldn’t get to a bathroom.
A says
Yes, this happened with our daughter when she was wearing pull-ups at night after being daytime potty trained. We had better luck with the Honest brand pull-ups. More expensive, of course, but it eliminated the rash issue.
Anon says
I found diaper rash to be way worse in pull-ups. We had to try a few brands to find one that worked; ultimately we ended up with pull-up brand (which I think are huggies) even though pampers diapers was our “rash free” diaper brand.
Anon says
Is it normal for a 4 year old to not use the right form of verbs? Her language is pretty good I think except she makes everything past tense by putting “-ed” on the end of the word (“the insect bite hurted me,” “i weared that shirt yesterday” etc). Right now, we correct when she says it wrong but don’t make a big deal out of it.
Anonymous says
I think a lot of kids go through a phase where they absorb linguistic rules and apply them indiscriminately without regard for irregular verbs and other exceptions.
My husband still does this with certain verbs.
Spirograph says
Extremely normal. English is a ridiculous language where the rules exist only so you can have a million exceptions to them. Irregular verb tenses are not something you should expect a 4 year old to have mastered.
Anon says
Yeah the four year old is normal. English is abnormal.
OP says
What she’s doing is definitely more logistically consistent than English.
OP says
Logically
Anonymous says
Yes! That is a normal and expected phase of language development! You don’t need to correct her, she’ll figure it out (not that I can stop myself from correcting sometimes).
GCA says
+1, totally normal part of language development; my kid does this too! Her brain is absorbing the linguistic rule and applying it in a way that would be correct if not for the bazillion irregular verbs we have in English.
anon says
completely normal
Anon says
if it’s not, then I have two abnormal 4 year olds in my house. i think they are still learning at age 4?!?
OP says
Thanks for the gut check everyone. I know a lot of very precocious preschoolers who speak like adults, so I appreciate the confirmation that this is normal.
anon says
My 4 year old used ‘oh shit’ in proper context this weekend but uses incorrect tenses regularly. Proud mama, right here….. facepalm.
Anon says
another pull-ups question. my daytime potty trained 4 year old still wears a diaper at night, which I am totally fine with. sometimes though she wakes up because she needs to go to the bathroom and i’d like her to be able to go herself, so she doesn’t wake us up. are pull-ups actually easy enough for a kid to pull up and down themselves without them ripping? are they as absorbent as diapers? bc she also often wakes up in the middle of the night to chug the water next to her bed
Anonymous says
They are easier for kids to pull up and down themselves, yes. That’s why I use them at night at this age. I use a night time one that is more absorbent but ymmv – one of my kids barely wets at night at 4 and the other had to have an extra giant maxi pad stuck in the super night time pull up until he night trained closer to 5.
Spirograph says
wow, I wish I had thought of the super absorbent maxi pad + pullup when I was in this phase. One of my kids nighttime potty trained very late, and pullups did nothing to prevent me from needing to change the sheets.
Anon says
My 3.5 year old could not get them pull-ups on and off without ripping them, even once she was able to manage underwear easily. Actually diapers were easier for her to manage than pull-ups, especially for removal since you just pull the tabs and they fall off. Could she start the night in a diaper and then go back to bed diaperless after peeing? Pull-ups are also not as absorbent as diapers in my experience.
OP says
nope. she will probably have to pee again, so that wouldn’t work. right now between wanting to pee/nightmares she is waking up 1-5 times a night and i’m tired.
Anonymous says
One approached that helped minimize night wakings for one of my kids was to pick him up (asleep) at like 10:30-11 pm and take him to pee- he didn’t really wake up and yet could use the toilet just fine, and then would wake up less the rest of the night. We did this for YEARS.
Anon says
This is so kid dependent. If we’d picked my daughter up from bed at that age she would have immediately started screaming and not stopped for at least an hour. I’m jealous of everyone who could transfer a sleeping toddler from a car seat to a bed or something like that. It never worked for us at all.
Anonymous says
Same poster from above with the waking to pee- this same child never ONCE in his life slept in a stroller or transferred from a car seat to crib. But somehow he was fine groggily waking up to pee from ages 3.5-6. Kids are mysterious.
Anonymous says
My kids didn’t pee on their own at night until around 1st grade. Honestly, I think they didn’t wake enough to be able to do it, they just woke enough to call for me and I’d take them to the bathroom. Maybe cut out the water next to her bed to reduce the wakings, have a nightlight to help with nightmares? Potty training put me back to infant wakings and it was so painful.
OP says
we have lots of lights in her room, which seem to be doing nothing. and we used to not have water next to her bed, but then she would wake up asking for water so we thought having it next to her bed would eliminate the need for us to get up to get it for her. honestly, this is worse than having a newborn. i was lucky in retrospect that my twins generally woke up on a schedule
Anonymous says
Same RE: 1st grade. OP, what if you put a stack of pull ups in the bathroom? That way if it rips, she can just grab a new one.
Anonymous says
There are some pull ups that have velcro on the sides (Target brand is one), I would think that might make the sides more likely to rip when she’s pulling them up and down herself, so I suggest trying a different kind (I think the pampers ones are solid sides). And it sounds like this isn’t a contributing factor, but little potty in my kiddo’s room helped with nighttime potty independence so much.
Anon says
We just switched my 4.5 year old from overnight diapers to pull ups and she’s magically dry overnight now. I explained that she should try not to pee in them and she was instantly fine. I think diapers gave her “permission” to pee vs. the pull up seems more grown up and she wants to keep it dry.
She can more easily pull/push them up or down to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night if she needs to. If she rips one, she knows where they are and can put a clean one on herself. They seem to hold a decent amount of pee on the rare instances she does go, though.
anon says
+1 This is what happened with my 3yo. Turns out she was peeing in her overnight diapers when she woke up in the morning because she could, but when we put her in underwear overnight she stopped and would just go to the bathroom when she woke up in the morning.
Anon. says
My 2.5 year old wears pull-ups exclusively, not as a potty training tool but because she gets cuts on her hips where the diaper tape rubs. We’re going to potty train soon, but haven’t gotten there yet so, pull ups it is until then. She can take them off by herself and has never ripped one that I’ve seen. We see roughly the same absorbency as regular diapers. Agreed on the comment above to look for a brand that has solid sides versus Velcro like sides. We use Pampers.
anon says
Does anyone have favorite Spanish apps or TV shows for a 6 yo? Our rising 1st grader was in a Spanish immersion program this past year and learned a lot, but is far far from fluent. We’d like to keep up her skills over the summer, but don’t speak Spanish ourselves.
I sometimes turn Netflix or Disney+ shows into Spanish for her, but she isn’t really fluent enough to enjoy watching and stops after 15 minutes or so. I think she may need something less linguistically advanced, but still engaging.
Anon says
A lot of people here hate Peppa Pig, but it’s good for second language learning because it’s linguistically pretty simple.
Anon says
i’m not the OP, but perhaps if my kids want to watch Peppa again I will make them watch it in spanish. it’s a cute show, but it made my kids obnoxious and they constantly go around saying “that’s boring” like Peppa does, which is something they never said before.
Anonymous says
You need to down level the show when you switch to the other language. My kids like Bluey, Doc McStuffins, Elena of Avalor and Tots (the one with the stork and penguin- not sure the name) in their other language even though they don’t watch them in English. We also allow extra screen time if they are watching something non-English so that’s a big motivator. It’s also about getting comfortable with not understanding every single thing that’s said.
Allie says
Youtube videos of kids song?
Anonymous says
Pocoyo on Netflix is very low linguistically and very visually explicative (without distracting background visuals). Our kids watch it in spanish.
Anonymous says
Muzzy.
Anonymous says
My Spanish-speaking 3 year old (fluent but younger than yours, so maybe an OK comparator) likes Bluey (Disney +), Daniel Tiger, and Stinky and Dirty (both Prime). You also might have luck with movies she already knows in English and Disney + should have lots of options (even if they don’t have everything available in Spanish, i know Encanto, Lucca, and Cars are on there)
Anon says
Thru hiking the PCT with three kids under 5 is the new “sailing with toddlers in Alaska” ;) https://laist.com/news/los-angeles-activities/hiking-the-pacific-crest-trail-with-toddlers-kids
In all seriousness, this sounds like my personal definition of h3ll but kudos to these parents for getting their 3 and 5 year old to walk ~15 miles a day.
Anon says
i just read that article and talk about things i have NO interest in attempting to do with my children (or without honestly).
Anon says
Yeah I like hiking but that is too intense for me even without kids. I like day hiking and then going back to the comfort of a luxury hotel.
Anonymous says
Then there is running a marathon with your 6-year-old: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/6-year-old-boy-runs-marathon-parents-backlash-kami-ben-crawford-rainier-flying-pig-marathon-cincinntati-kentucky/
Anonymous says
Those must be some very obedient kids. I know a whole lot of 3-year-olds and even 5-year-olds who would run off the edge of a cliff or throw themselves down in the middle of the trail and have a tantrum.
Anon says
My kid wouldn’t run off a cliff but she would absolutely sit down and refuse to move. She did that when we went on a short walk to the ice cream place this past weekend. It is unfathomable to me that some 3 year olds can walk 15 miles in one day.
Anonymous says
My parents are in a hiking club and there’s one family with a (now) 4 year old who joins sometimes. The kid does 3+ mile hikes at 6,000-8,000 elevation with +/- 500 elevation changes per hike. He has gone since he was 2. My dad swears he walks every step of the way himself.
My kid is actually remarkably happy and chill when we’re in the forest. We don’t go often because my husband hates it, but I suspect she would be doing five mile hikes pretty easily by now if we had time to work up to them.
Anon says
Five miles is so different than 15 though. Don’t get me wrong, I think a preschooler doing 5 mile hikes at elevation is very impressive. But it’s still only a third of the way to what these guys are doing!
Anonymous says
Right. My older kid was easily doing 3-7 mile serious hikes at 4-5 years old but no way would we have done 15. My younger one doesn’t hike as well so I think it’s the kid not the parenting.
Anon says
And they’re doing it day after day. It’s not just a one-time 15 mile hike. That sounds miserable to me even without kids.
anon says
Yeah, I can do a week of 5-mile hikes with my 4 and 5 yos (returning to creature comforts like electricity and plumbing at night) without any complaints, but 15 miles is a whole other story.
Anonymous says
Who can afford to take 6 months off of work to do this?
Anon says
They’re probably banking on Instagram sponsorships.
Anon says
The dad works for the California Park Service and it says he earned a lot of extra vacation time working through the pandemic so they let him take off the time. I’m assuming mom is a SAHM. The article also says they live with her parents. Definitely a unique job situation but it doesn’t seem like they’re loaded with cash.
Anonymous says
Ski instructors. Or, conversely, rafting guides. Wilderness firefighters. Summer camp instructors. Underwater welders can make 40k per project, typically a couple weeks of work and then go scuba diving for three months. Most of the super outdoorsy people I know do some sort of seasonal outdoor work. I knew a guy who kept saying he was going to work in a salmon cannery in Alaska for a summer and clear something like 60k. I don’t know if he ever did, though.
And now with Influencing at least some of them can make some money year round from endorsements and ads.
Anonymous says
My BIL did the salmon cannery thing one summer during law school. I don’t think he made anything like that kind of money, though.
Anon says
I went to college in Seattle and the ‘summer in Alaska’ gig was pretty common. I have several friends who paid for a big chunk of tuition by working super long hours on the boats or in the canneries. This was in the mid-90s, and they cleared about 20 grand a summer but the hours were grueling.
Anon says
Yeah, that money isn’t there anymore. Cannery workers now are immigrants, mostly, not college students.
Anon says
We’ve done 8 miles with our 4 and 7 yos. It went really well, but there were lots of opportunities for them to play in creeks and on big rocks.
(Really, the adults hiked 8 miles and they probably hiked 12 with all of their climbing and exploring. We rested on breaks and they used breaks as mental rest from following a trail to run, jump and climb.)
Spirograph says
Haha this. None of my kids were super hikers at 3, but now they easily hike 2x the distance I do because they do not go in a straight line. In fact, I think the hard part about attempting to do 15 miles in one day with kids wouldn’t be getting them to go that far, it would be focusing all their energy on forward progress rather than running, jumping, and climbing!
anon says
For those who haven’t spent much time in the woods with their kids, we’ve found that our kids are much nicer people when out in nature. They love camping and go from slightly obnoxious and somewhat anxious to relaxed, chill and happy. All of the bickering about who gets the red cup or who gets to stand on the left when brushing their teeth or who said jinx first goes away. They climb trees. They explore. They search for bugs. Then they crash hard at the end of the day. It’s magical (and totally worth sleeping on the ground).
So far we’ve only done base camp trips, but have plans to start backpacking with them soon. (They’re 6 and almost 9 yo).
Anon says
It is magical for me kid too. I love watching her run down the trails. I think water/swimming is like this for other people-just have to find your happy place.
Anonymous says
In addition to the 3- and 5-year-olds, they have a toddler who rides in a backpack. What on earth do they do with the diapers? I was afraid to go camping until our daughter was out of diapers because of bears, and the bears on the west coast are way more aggressive than the ones here on the east coast. I can’t imagine having to haul around 7 – 14 days’ worth of dirty diapers in a bear canister. And then what about blowouts? Dirty clothes and kid who needs a bath? Shudder.
Anon says
I think the toddler might be potty trained? The article referenced poop-stained pants but I thought that was referring to an accident. But yeah it requires a high tolerance for filth. I’m also amazed at how they can pack enough food for 5 very active people. My kid eats an insane amount on a normal day, I can’t even imagine how much she’d need to eat if she were hiking 15 miles/day.
Anon says
sleep help for 4 year old (i’m the OP of one of the pull up questions above, but different question). i was reading about sleep and it said that as kids get older and they have a lot of night wake ups it is usually bc they are anxious about something happening during the day. the only change to our kid’s routine is she is now at camp instead of school, but its at the same place as her school, but with a different teacher and slightly different group of kids. she seems to be having a blast and asked already if she can do it again next year. how do you figure out what a 4 year old is anxious about? this issue also seems to have intensified significantly after she had Covid a few weeks ago. anyone else’s kid have sleep issues post-covid? (in case you can’t tell i am desperate for sleep)
Anonymous says
Sleep disruptions are a known aftereffect of Covid.
Anon says
I agree this is probably Covid related. I wouldn’t give it without ped approval, but melatonin might help. In addition to helping with sleep generally, it has anti-inflammatory properties and has been shown in some small studies to lessen Covid severity, so might also work on long covid issues (which unfortunately I think this qualifies as).
Anon says
i’ve taken melatonin myself but i find it helps more with falling asleep than staying asleep, which is what our issue is.
Anon says
It can help with both. I take it for the former, but my mom has successfully used it for the latter. I’ve found it also has mild anti-anxiety properties, if anxiety is the issue.
OP says
thanks! it often gives me bad dreams, which i’m nervous about for her, but I suppose I can always try it. she slept better as a newborn!
Anon says
We went into escrow on what’s basically our dream/forever home in our ideal neighborhood this weekend (VHCOL area). Naturally, it’s at the top of our price range because of these factors. Now, of course, the financial markets are nuts, layoffs are picking up, and I’m having tremendous amounts of anxiety over handing over our significant (mid-six figure) down payment very soon when it seems we’re on the verge of or already in a recession.
I don’t know if there’s a point to this, other than to say that I wish I knew what the right thing to do here was.
Anon says
I hear you. Don’t go nuts, but remember that while a house is an investment, it is primarily your residence. Market downturns do happen and you may lose money, but you also need a place to live. Be reasonable and operate with the information you have (including comps!) to make this decision and ensure you are being responsible with your monthly payment. Buying a house is stressful in general and I have a lot of sympathy for those trying to buy right now.
eh230 says
I am in a similar position. We close on selling our house today and close on new house next week. We are moving because I started a new, remote job in January at a start up that is somewhat tied to real estate. I feel on the verge of throwing up on the regular. Anxiety sisters unite.
Anonymous says
Similar. Luckily, we should get way too much money for our current house that we’ll put toward the new house, so I figure it is a wash. I locked in our mortgage rate yesterday but wish I had 2-3 weeks ago. We ended up going with a 10/30 ARM. Hopefully we can refinance within 10 years to something a little lower for the whole life of the loan. This is probably our last pre-retirement house. But our financial advisor was comfortable with the terms compared to our trajectory 10 years from now if the worst happens rate-wise.
Anon (OP) says
We’re also doing a 10-year ARM because the rate is so much better vs. a traditional 30-year right now. We could technically afford the 30-year but it gives us a little more flexibility on cash flow between bonuses (a big part of our income) and we can make additional principal payments in good years.
Unfortunately for us, this is our first home, so we don’t have the benefit of home equity to throw at it. I’m trying to take solace in the fact that our rent would probably go up 10% this year, so it won’t be that different in terms of a monthly payment. I’m still a nervous wreck, though.
Anon says
I like how people on this site always drop things like that they’re making a mid six figure down payment as if it’s a reason they should be more anxious, not less. If you’re in a position to do that, you’ll be fine. (From someone whose home is probably worth less than your down payment and who is still in an economically privileged position and will probably do fine).
Anon says
+1
Anonymous says
I should ask my nanny if she wants to switch to mother’s helper once my youngest start preschool, right? It would be reduced hours but I’m thinking similar pay ($20/hr). She’s doing online bachelors program so I think she will have time. She’s honestly incredible and I can’t imagine finding someone better. I just need help with laundry and tidying and possibly some kid transport. I’ll talk to DH but just wanted to make sure this isn’t silly or a waste of her time – she’d have a 30 minute commute to our house. I’d pay mileage for kid transport on top of the hourly rate.
Anon says
This isn’t silly at all. Sound like you can make a win/win situation for everyone. Do it if you can arrive at an hourly rate that makes sense for everyone.
EDAnon says
Doesn’t hurt to ask!
Anon says
i don’t know that i would call that a mother’s helper, it is a part-time nanny. mother’s helper to me implies that mom is home and needs an extra set of hands. but are you taking all childcare out of the equation and she would literally just be doing laundry and tidying? bc that sounds more like a housekeeper.
Anon says
+1
Anon says
Yeah, mother’s helper is a job for a responsible 10-12 year old.
ElisaR says
+1
Anonymous says
Why change the title? I think of a mothers helper as a high school (or younger) kid that can only provide care when mom is around. It sounds like you want to reduce hours, but not job responsibilities? Honestly not trying to be snarky! I have had several nanny/ house managers that were particular about their titles. Making it sound like a down grade in jobs may be a turn off, and that is not what I think you mean? I think you should just ask if she is willing to work less hours?
OP says
You’re right. I should just ask if she’d be willing to go part time. This is the simplest solution. Thanks!
NYCer says
Will she be doing any childcare? Or is it basically just housekeeping? It certainly does not hurt to ask, but I wouldn’t be shocked if someone who is used to full time child care does not want to switch to full time housekeeping.
If preschool is only 9-12, and she will still be doing childcare in the afternoon, I would expect her to be much more amenable. Though if she is used to full time hours, she may not want the pay cut. It can be tough to find good part time nannies.
Anon says
Yeah, plus one to all of the above. In my area, nannies generally don’t love going to part-time hours and we’ve never had success adding housekeeping duties to their plates (even at higher pay). BUT doesn’t hurt to ask. Definitely wouldn’t call it a mothers helper though. Maybe you could try to find someone else who needs the hours you’d be dropping so her overall time doesn’t change?
Anonymous says
How many hours are you looking to pay her for? Like if it’s 2-6pm everyday that might be a good fit for her. If she’s looking for more hours, what about a biweekly date night for you and DH? Like every second Saturday 7-11 or something?
Anon says
Low stakes question. Baby 2 is due two weeks before toddler’s birthday. Should I throw toddler’s birthday a month before actual birthday so they can have some fun celebrations? No way am I throwing a birthday party with a 2 week old! I suppose throwing a bday party extremely pregnant isn’t exactly fun either, but maybe the easier of the two options.
Anon says
I’d skip a party this year. Just do a cake at home on her actual birthday.
Two year olds find their own birthday party’s to be more stressful than fun. If at their house, they get stressed over sharing their toys. If elsewhere, then get stressed being the center of attention. It’s really just a recipe for a meltdown.
Anon says
+1 A 2 year old really doesn’t need a big party. 3 is the earliest they get enjoyment out of a friend party.
NYCer says
How old is the toddler turning? I am guessing 2 or 3? If it were me, I would not have an elaborate birthday party at all. On the actual bday, have your husband (or other family member if anyone is nearby) get a big bunch of balloons, and maybe some streamers or other decorations for your house or yard, a cake and call it a day.
Anonymous says
Is this a friend party or a family party? For a friend party, outsource. Get grandma/grandpa, aunt/uncle, or a close family friend to host the party at a park or party venue. A friend of mine just did this twice for the two daughters of a family she’s close to that is going through some stuff, and it worked out well.
Anon says
If the toddler is 3 or under, I’d do it after baby comes and meet at a playground with two or three friends for pizza, cake, and everyone gets a balloon to take home. If they are older or you want something for their whole class, then yes, I’d definitely do it before baby is due.
Anonymous says
We didn’t have an actual birthday party until kindergarten. It was fine.
Anon says
+1 My kid’s first birthday party was 5 because of the pandemic and it was fine. She really didn’t know what she was missing and didn’t care. Even if your 3 year old had a birthday party last year, they won’t remember it well enough to be disappointed this year.
Anon says
I agree with outsource if you can, or skip. DD was due two weeks before DS2 turned 2, and a friend (preschool parent) offered to throw a joint birthday party for DS2 and her daughter. I did favors (ahead of time) and pizza; she did everything else. (I think I also left DD home with my parents.) We also did a family birthday party a week later, but that was very low stress (except for allowing DS1 to decorate the cake). If you are trying to do it early, you run the risk of cancelling the whole thing if the baby comes early (and then there’s stress AND disappointment).
anonM says
Do it super early, and keep it super simple. I went into labor on DS’s birthday party day, whoops, so yeah don’t be like me and plan it too close to the due date. Also agree with the people above suggesting outdoors/small. We are getting over COVID here, and the idea of getting it 8/9 mo pregnant sounds miserable.
Father’s Day says
Any fun ideas for Father’s Day gifts? My kid decorated a mug for my husband, but I need to figure out something little from me.
Anonymous says
I asked my neighborhood listserv for pet sitter recommendations, and I got the number of an 8-yr old (and her dad) who “wants to start a pet sitting business”. That should be fine, right? We just need someone to come over once a day to check on the cat, clean the litter box, etc. I’m assuming she’ll be chaperoned by her dad at all times and won’t just be wandering around my house on her own. I don’t know, something about hiring an 8 year old seems weird to me. Thoughts?
Anon says
I think it’s a great idea! I would just confirm with dad that he will be supervising.
NYCer says
Most likely will be fine. Can you have a conversation with her dad separately just to make sure you are all on the same page?
Anonymous says
Not terribly unusual. I would make sure that the dad will be supervising to prevent the cat from getting out.
Momofthree says
I think it depends a bit on the child, but generally, I would say, no it doesn’t sound weird, especially if the parent will be going with them.
You could always have a quick visit before you hire them to come to the house. Then you can meet the kid & show them the things they’ll need to do.
Also, the pay rate should be a bit lower for an 8 yo then what you’d have to pay an adult to do the same thing, so that’s a plus
Anon says
Not weird, especially if dad is helping. I had a dog walking “business” when I was 8.
anonM says
I’d def do this. You get to be a supportive neighbor to a kid trying to learn responsibility and independence! And, long-term, an 8yo who wants to pet-sit can, later on, be a responsible house-sitter or whatever! However, I wouldn’t assume the parents are necessarily going to be with her every day unless you request it. (Like, maybe they plan to hang out in the driveway in their car, and if kiddo takes too long they’d go check on her, which tbh sounds fine for a responsible 8yo). (I will note, though, for security – it is always a good idea to keep track somewhere of who you give codes/keys to JUST in case years later you ever decide it isn’t a good idea, you can quickly make sure they can’t get into your house….signed, my parents forgot they gave an old neighbor a key….).
anon says
If your cat is mild-mannered and there are no special needs at play (e.g., needing to administer medicine), sure, why not?
Anonymous says
Does the dad know anything about taking care of cats? Is the cat friendly (will it bite if petted too much or hide)? For us potential issues would be the cats hide so sitter starts worrying they escaped, need to clean up vomit or (shudder) pee/poop outside the litter box, or sudden illness (happened once with an older cat). My son is 10 and feeds our cats but he requires close supervision; he often “forgets” 1/3 of the food. He would not clean the litter box except under extreme duress.
EDAnon says
We had a setup like that with snow removal. The parent attested that he would manage it if the kid flaked. Kid did not flake and has done it two years in a row and it’s awesome!