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anon. says
A few weeks ago someone recommended the Bubble Bum inflatable car seats for international travel. Any other similarly light weight, packable recommendations before I buy a couple of these? Kids are 3 and 6. My SIL lives internationally so we rent a car when we’re there – and we’ll have a lot of driving to do but mostly in 2 hour type increments. Thanks.
Cb says
Where does your sister live? If we were doing a lot of driving, I’d probably just buy inexpensive high backed boosters? I looked at the mifolds but the reviews suggest they aren’t super comfy.
If you don’t have any other visit planned, you can get rid of them via freecycle or fb marketplace.
Anonymous says
Just FYI… https://www.iihs.org/news/detail/new-research-raises-questions-about-inflatable-booster-seats – they’re not NOT recommended anymore but there are concerns.
Anon says
https://www.iihs.org/news/detail/new-research-raises-questions-about-inflatable-booster-seats
anon says
For several two hour drives, I’d want the 3 yo in a real car seat and the 6 yo in a real booster. We’ve only used the inflatable boosters for really short jaunts–e.g., airport to hotel in a cab (and back at the end).
Anon says
My ped told us not to use those. We have $20 Graco backless boosters from Target that have gone on multiple trips, including internationally. They’re kind of a pain to lug around but they don’t count against your carry on bag allowance. You can also check them I’m sure.
3 is also pretty young for a booster seat. I believe technically kids have to be 4. If they’re like 3.9 it’s probably not a big deal though.
NYCer says
I would probably consider a Ride Safer Vest, at least for the 3 year old. FWIW, we have the Wayb Pico for trips like this, but that is probably more expensive than it is worth at this point for you given your kids’ ages.
Cornellian says
Agreed. the vest is super useful.
Anon says
We travel frequently, so I splurged on the WAYB foldable travel seat for my twins. You might be able to find them second hand now because they are getting more popular? But as noted above, I just didn’t feel comfortable putting my then 3 year olds (who are smaller) in any of the other travel options I found. For my then 6 year old, we used the mi-fold once, but we couldn’t ever quite get the hang of it, so we now tuck a traditional booster in one of the WAYB travel bags.
Anon says
Really good point on longevity for the WAYBs from NYC-er, depending on the age and size of your 3 year old. We started with ours just before the twins turned 3, and are still using them at nearly 5. Again, my twins have always been on the smaller side, so we probably got more use than others might, but also, we expect to re-sell them in the next year and will recoup much of the original cost on the secondary market. We do one big ski trip and one big international trip per year, plus sometimes a flight back to see family. Given that our 2 big flights involve winter driving and international driving – so our big trips involve unfamiliar cars in unfamiliar places – I have never regretted having a five point harness with a latch option available for us. We also used them on planes to keep two squirrely toddlers in their seats until they turned about 4.
Anon says
[revised to avoid moderation]
Really good point on longevity for the WAYBs from NYC-er, depending on the age and size of your 3 year old. We started with ours just before the twins turned 3, and are still using them at nearly 5. Again, my twins have always been on the smaller side, so we probably got more use than others might, but also, we expect to re-sell them in the next year and will recoup much of the original cost on the secondary market. We do one big ski trip and one big international trip per year, plus sometimes a flight back to see family. Given that our 2 big flights involve winter driving and international driving – so our big trips involve unfamiliar cars in unfamiliar places – I have never reg re t ted having a five point harness with a latch option available for us. We also used them on planes to keep two squirrely toddlers in their seats until they turned about 4.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Mifold hifold highback boosters. I agree that 3 is a bit young for even highback boosters, but these are definitely better than backless inflatables.
Anone says
I have a 4 and 6 year olds and still plan to use the inflatables. it’s much much easier for travel and it’s worth it to me.
Anonymous says
We use the mifold backless for ages 6 and up (I’d probably go with a mifold highback for the 3 yr old). But they are a PITA to buckle and unbuckle. That doesn’t matter if most of your trips are 2 hrs but it is a pain for lots of 15-20 min trips like we often have. So In-laws store regular backless boosters in their attic that we use. We still need the mifolds for to/from airport and on stopovers (I generally try to work in a stopover visit in another city in at least one direction).
Don’t forget that you can check the car seat bag for free until they are like 6 or 7. I’ve stuffed so much stuff in those bags over the years – hiking boots, beach towels, life jackets. Highly recommend the Clek ones. Protects the seat and gives you tons of rooms to ‘pad’ the car seat with towels/snowsuits etc depending on the season. Only thing is they do take up a bunch of trunk space, even when emptied after the plane ride.
anonn says
a year ago we got scolded by Southwest for putting beach towels and diapers in a car seat bag! they told us we could only have a car seat in there! we’d done it maybe 15 flights prior and 3 flights since. We just apologized and moved on with our day.
FP says
We have the mifold hifold for my 4 and 6 year old. I think they are great for travel and two of them fit nicely in an LLBean large tote for carrying on to a plane. I have traveled with both kids alone while carrying the tote with the two seats inside, plus a backpack, and it was not overwhelming. The poster below is right that they are a little annoying for short in and out trips but I have been extremely happy with them. We started using the hifold when my younger son was 3.5 as he is 90th percentile height/weight.
TheElms says
I wouldn’t use a Bubblebum for a 3 year (do they meet the weight requirement). Instead I’d do a Ride Safer Vest, which is more like having them in a 5 point harness.
Anon says
+1. Especially with the tether option, I feel much better about it.
Searching for comfy kid friendly throw pillows says
We have a couch in our playroom which is on the main floor of our house so I like it looking somewhat decent and not 100% kid land. The current throw pillows on it are from when it was our living room couch pre kids. They are starting to show their age and my 4 year old likes to pull the feathers from them and then my baby likes to eat the feathers. Its driving me batty. Looking for suggestions for comfortable pillows (grandparents read a lot of stories on this couch) that are also kid friendly. Any favorites?
AwayEmily says
I find Target throw pillows are great in terms of both design and quality. And not so $$ that it’s a tragedy when someone throws up on one.
FVNC says
I think Homegoods or Tuesday Morning are perfect for this sort of thing. I just outfitted a window seat with throw pillows and a blanket from Homegoods.
Sometimes, places like Pottery Barn have good sales on pillows (without the inserts). If you go that route, a home decor blogger I trust (chrissy marie blog) recommends a specific pillow insert from Amazon home.
Anonymous says
I prefer pillows with removable, washable covers and synthetic inserts. Mine are from Pottery Barn.
Anon says
i asked the other week about Disney planners and have reached out to some of the recommended ones, but haven’t heard back from most, so I wanted to do a follow up post to see if anyone else has any suggestions. thanks!
Anonymous says
We just got done planning two trips with the same planners – honestly next time I’m not doing it. They only have specific plans to sell you so we wound up buying a 3-day plan even though we really only wanted 1. If you can get a booking the Swan & Dolphin (you can use points, too) is similarly close but a lot more affordable; most of the privileges you had from staying on site are gone now except for early entrance.
Anon says
what were some of the privileges you used to get?
Boston Legal Eagle says
Check out magicandsaffron on insta and reach out to her. She’s usually pretty responsive.
anon says
Mandi – castleandcrownvacations (dot) com – cavet- I haven’t booked with her yet but was recommended by a friend- I’ve gotten a few samples back from her and we decided to pause our vacay planning for a bit
Liza says
Unlocking the Magic travel was super responsive to me when I reached out, and I like their podcast a lot
Anonymous says
Can anyone recommend specific videos with a kid-friendly yoga flow or something ritualized to help with mindfulness and body awareness? Looking for something to do with my 8 year old but everything seems be filled with lots of extra padding and my guy needs something relatively quick and to the point. I know Cosmic Kids is good but don’t want to wade through 10,000 videos.
Cb says
I’d look for a kid’s body scan on youtube? I just DIY them for my son, but I know they do podcasts, and they must do videos as well.
DLC says
For meditation/ mindfulness exercises, we’ve been using the Smiling Mind app. Mostly because it’s free, but I like the Australian accents and the fact that it’s audio only.
EDAnon says
My son is 4 and loves to select his own things on the headspace app. They have movement but we use it as bedtime so he mostly does breathing and then sleep music. His 6yo brother will do it too but not as consistently. The breathing is only 60 seconds usually but sometimes he will add on. Last night, he did the breathing exercise five times!
Anonymous says
Speaking of travel car seats, I’m reporting in on using the Wayb Pico on an air/car trip last month. On the way out, the seat fit great in the airplane and was easy to install. It was also fairly easy to install in the car, although I didn’t feel it was super secure and wouldn’t use it as an everyday seat. However, on the plane ride home we could not get it to install correctly at all — something about the length of the seatbelt made it impossible to buckle it in. So we went without and had our 3.5 year old in the regular plane seat, which turned out to be totally fine and we probably won’t use a seat on the plane in future. Overall I would not buy the Wayb Pico at full price again, since it seems to have pretty limited use. If I got one for free or significant discount though, it’s handy. The best part is how easy it was to carry through the airport, as compared to the Cosco Scenera Next which desperately needs a handle!
Anon says
I don’t use a carseat for my kids on the plane over the age of 2. I find that they are more comfortable without them and are able to travel better. When they are under 2 we use the cosco Scenera Next and we have a strap that clips close that we use to attach it to the yo yo stroller if we are using it on the plane. Very easy to clip it on. If we are not using it on the plane we use a travel backpack for it.
AwayEmily says
What’s the strap? We’re going to be traveling with a Scenera Next and a stroller (an ancient Britax B-Agile) and need to figure out how to attach them.
Anon says
https://sg.taxibaby.com/pages/strollerhacks-database This website might help you find a way.
We usually just use a luggage strap from Amazon to put it over the handle. So our kid is not sitting in it. Our preferred airplane method is to wear the kid in the ergo carrier and use our yo yo stroller as a way to hold everything and then we just loop the car seat on the handle with the luggage strap.
Anon says
Same. It would never occur to me to have a 3.5 year old in a car seat on a plane. We used the Cosco seats (first Scenera Next then Finale) for travel between the end of the bucket seat era (~8 months for us) and age 4, but from age 2 on we gate checked it.
anon says
Anyone use a sleep consultant for a 3 year old? Do you think it was worth it, did it resolve the issue? Our 3 yo has been waking at least once if not 2-3 times every night for almost a year now and waking up for good around 515-530am every single day. We’ve tried bribes, walking him back multiple times, dream pee, moving bedtime, big dinner, ok to wake clock, very active days, and none of it has worked. He’s been nap free for a month, no change. He got tubes in his ears and adenoids removed, no change. I could maybe live with the early wake up if that’s just the way things are with him but the multiple night wakings are killing us. Thing is, its hard for me to think of what a sleep consultant could possibly tell us that we don’t already know. We’ve had a consistent bedtime routine since 4 months old. Our older kid sleeps like a pro. Its having a big impact on our family and our marriage because we are sooo tired all the time. And cranky. Thoughts?
Anon says
Following…my almost 2-year-old has slept poorly his whole life. Like, one time in his life he slept 7 hours straight and every other night has been up at least every 3 hours. We also did tubes/adenoids with no change to sleep (colds go away faster, though).
Runner says
Oh man, hugs. I’d say, try the sleep consultant. Many of them do intakes/consultations so you can be really clear about everything you’ve tried, some of them have guarantees or at least will work with you until there’s improvement. I’d ask about both before you $$$. And it can’t hurt, and that way you can really say you’ve tried everything. I’d also start trading off with a partner (like go sleep somewhere else far away if you can) so that you all can at least get every other nights of unbroken sleep, if you all aren’t doing that already.
anon says
What does he do when he wakes up in the morning? Can you get him to play quietly in his room? Our rule with our kids is that they need to be quiet and stay in their rooms until 7 AM. They sometimes wake up early and look at / read books or arrange their stuffies, but they’re quiet and calm so everyone else can sleep.
What does he do when he wakes up at night? Can you put a sleeping bag on the floor in your room and just have him crawl in without waking you? By age 4 yo, he needs to start handling the wake ups himself if he’s not sick. He doesn’t get to wake you up just because he’s up.
anon says
I guess what I was trying to say is that I think he’s aging out of the sleep consultant zone. He’s getting old enough to start handling wake ups like a bigger kid. Big kids do something quiet, without waking anyone, until they fall back asleep.
OP says
Yeah, I guess that’s what I’m wondering–is it worth it at this point. He absolutely refuses to “play quietly” on his own in his room in the morning and we usually give up because we are tired, cranky, but mostly because we don’t want his screaming to wake his sister. He’s in a very defiant stage. How did you get your kids to agree to stay in their room? The red light/green light clock thing has been a big failure for us. Maybe at this point we just have to wait it out?
Anon says
Could you put a podcast on in his room if he wakes up early to listen to? Arthur the PBS show now has a podcast and I have a zillion more that my kid loves. Or the Yoto would be a great early morning activity. Our rule is our kid has to stay in their room but the light can be on and they can do a variety of activities but we will turn on a podcast or give them the yoto. The hatch turns green at 7 am and they can leave the room then. We had to be a broken record and hold firm time and time again about it but now its habit for them.
Anon says
Truthfully I think we started being super grumpy when they woke us up so they learned not to do it. At two yo we were patient and helped. At four, if they were not scared or sick, we had far less patience. Our only message was don’t wake us or your sibling up: sleep in our room (we were fine if they crawled in our bed) or your room but do not wake us under any circumstance. There was some learning curve, but it clicked well before 5 yo.
AwayEmily says
I would say definitely go for it. Sleep consultants have just seen SO MUCH that they may have some new ideas/approaches.
Anonymous says
No advice but also following for one of my 2 year old twins. His twin and my oldest sleep 8+ hours. He’s up 3x a night every time he has a cold, which is 9 months out of the year. I’m also considering adenoid surgery. I will say I had calls with two separate sleep consultants when he was 18 months and they were both like “shrug. You’re doing everything correctly” which was really disheartening because they were expensive. Have you thought about a sleep study? We haven’t done that yet.
Anon says
Multiple neighborhood kids had sleep problems that were resolved when looking into their iron. Their hemoglobin can be fine but they can have low iron stores which affects sleep. Might be worth asking at their upcoming doctor’s appt to do bloodwork to find out.
Anon says
This is interesting. I’m the commenter with the almost 2yo above; he was diagnosed with anemia at 9 months and has been on a heavy duty supplement since then (which leads to constipation and other sleep issues!) His iron is rising but slowly. I had heard iron issues can disrupt sleep, but since he’s been terrible since he was born I assumed other things are at play, too. Maybe I should push for something more intense re iron.
OP says
Interesting, hadn’t heard this. We are mostly vegetarian, so I suppose that could be it. (We aren’t against our kids eating meat but every time we’ve offered, they’ve refused.)
Anon says
Just make sure you are asking about the iron stores which is different than other iron levels.
Anonymous says
Ferritin
Anon says
We’ve had success with our two borderline anemic kids by giving them peanut butter toast as a snack just before bedtime. Starting around 3, they both would wake up ANGRY, and there is something about the protein and calories of PB toast that keeps them asleep all night and leads to a much calmer morning.
Artemis says
Try: https://instagram.com/themisscatherine?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
She’s lovely and will do an initial convo for free, I believe. Both a sleep consultant and a behavior consultant so you’ll get to attack the issue from all sides.
Anon says
my other suggestions are the pass system combined with CIO, though it does risk waking your older one, and/or sleeping bag next to your bed. what does he want when he wakes up in the middle of the night? does he sleep with a sound machine? does he see screens too close to bed?
OP says
What’s the “pass system?” Middle of night, he comes into our room or calls for us and wants either sip of water (he can do this on his own, just doesn’t want to), to go potty (same), to be tucked in (same), to find his lovey (same). Sleeps with sound machine, no screens for at least 1 1/2 hours before bed.
Anon says
i’m posting some links, so check back in a bit once they are approved
Anon says
here it is talked about in terms of kids refusing to go to bed/stay in their bed, but you just do the same thing for middle of the night wakings, or wakings before X time. i have a lot of friends who’ve used this method. Some started with 2 passes and then reduced it to 1 and then eventually didn’t have to do it anymore. the tough part is you have to stay strong and your kid may be banging at your door or screaming when you tell them that they’ve used up their passes and you will see them in the morning. implementation also depends on if he wakes up and just yells for you or wakes up and comes to get you. if it is the former, then i would start by telling him he cannot yell out and has to come and get you.
https://www.apa.org/pubs/books/supplemental/pediatric-sleep-problems/The_Bedtime_Pass.pdf
https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/09/18/441492810/the-bedtime-pass-helps-parents-and-kids-skip-the-sleep-struggles
https://www.babysleep.com/sleep-advice/whats-a-bedtime-pass-and-can-i-use-it-with-my-toddler/
Anon says
At that age and for those requests, I would be very, very thin on patience.
I would do the sleeping bag on the floor in your bedroom and allow him to come in and sleep there if he wants when he wakes up, but not allow him to wake you up.
I would have a discussion with him about how he’s a big boy and he’s able to do these things on his own and we only wake mommy and daddy up for something important, like feeling sick or a bad dream. Each time he wakes you up I would not entertain his request, put him back in bed, and go back to bed yourself. If after a few weeks it is still happening, I would start implementing consequences for non-necessary middle of the night wakeups.
Cb says
My son (5) has always had night terrors but last night, he was just sleepwalking, which was a welcome change from the horrified, wideyed screaming! He was like a tiny drunk person. He tried to get water out of the soap dispenser, complained “I don’t even know what you are talking about!”, and then jumped on our bed, put my sweater over his head like a ghost and giggled.
There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to it, he was tired, but not upset or wired. But I’m relieved that the screaming terrors seem less frequent.
Anonymous says
has anyone tried to turn a business trip into a family vacation (or add a family portion to the business portion)? any tips on logistics?
Anonymous says
I tried it and it’s awful. During the business portion, your family will get in the way and make you miserable.
Anne-on says
How old are your family members? I’ve had coworkers bring older teenagers, a partner/spouse, or a friend on work trips before (and my husband would tag along with me occasionally before we had kids). It worked fine as long as the family was aware you’d be gone for 12-14 hours and needed to go to bed at a reasonable hour. Frankly I was kind of jealous of my husband getting to sightsee in Paris while I was in meetings from 8am-8pm but it was nice to have an excuse to stay on and experience the city Friday-Sunday before we flew home.
I could not imagine doing this with young kids though unless they are VERY ok with not seeing you and your spouse is totally on board solo parenting and letting you work without guilting you.
Anonymous says
I have had problems with my husband hogging the bathroom in the morning while he is tagging along on a business trip.
EDAnon says
That’s terrible. Does he not work? We have done this kind of trip several times and the non-working spouse would never make the other one late.
Anon says
I have. My husband is a college professor so it is fairly normal for families to come to conferences, especially ones in cool locations. YMMV based on industry – I used to work in Big Law and it would have been very frowned upon for a lawyer (especially a woman) to bring her family on a business trip even if they didn’t show up at the work events, but academia is way more chill.
I wouldn’t say it’s awful but it’s not my favorite. I prefer proper family vacations or just traveling solo with my kid. Something about having my husband there but not free to help is mentally challenging for me. Of course it’s easier with older kids than babies/toddlers. Having extra adults helps too. On our best attempt at this my mom came too.
AwayEmily says
My husband and I are both professors and we tried a few times to take kids along to conferences. It was not enjoyable.
Anon says
Well I think it would be nearly impossible if you’re both trying to attend the conference!
AwayEmily says
oh jeez yes — that I would definitely not be brave enough to try! Luckily we are in different fields so one parent was not attending the conference.
Anon says
Oh gotcha, that makes more sense. I actually do know some couples in the same field who have brought their kids (especially infants) to conferences they were both attending, but I think in most cases they were in slightly different research areas so one parent was only semi-interested in the conference. It still seems really hard to me!
NYCer says
I think it works best if you tack on a few days at the end of the work trip. So if you are on a business trip in Paris, have your husband fly over on the last day with the kids, and then everyone stays for the weekend (or longer) together. I don’t think it works very well if you try to co-mingle the family vacation and the work trip, unless it is something like a conference, and the spouse with the work event knows she / he will have a lot of down time.
Anon says
For it to be successful, I think the non-working spouse needs to understand and agree going in that the working spouse has to give their primary attention to work. I could see there being a lot of resentment/frustration if the non-working spouse expects the working spouse to be present more than the working spouse is able.
for the biggest success, I think the non-working spouse and kids show up the day after the trip, and the working spouse just extends their trip.
Anonymous says
Yes. It’s why so many big conferences have spouse and kid programs.
If a regular business trip I agree with having spouse join on last day but then head to a nearby location to avoid business stretching into trip.
Jellybean says
We just did what I’d consider a mini version of this. My work event only lasted a few hours. So me, DH and kid all flew in together day before the event. We spent the next day together before I went to event. Then DH solo parented that afternoon/evening while I was gone. Then next day was Friday, which DH and I both took off so we had two full days as a family before flying home Sunday. For us it was absolutely great and a very welcomed bonus to have my flight and 2 nights of the hotel paid for! Obviously the “work” portion of mine was light, so ymmv.
SC says
I did this last year. DH, Kiddo, and I flew to Chicago on Friday, visited family in Michigan over the weekend, and returned to Chicago Sunday afternoon. I had deep dish pizza and went to the Willis Tower with them Sunday night. Conference was Monday-Wednesday. I was up and out of the hotel room before either family member woke up, so no issues sharing the bathroom in the mornings. I attended my conference approximately 7:45 am – 5 pm everyday. (I was just an attendee and did not have to present, and we were pretty slow at work that time of year.) During the days, DH took Kiddo out sightseeing. They rode the ferris wheel, went to Millenium Park, went to the aquarium. One night, they came with me to the large group reception at the Field Museum (for which the conference organizers sold family tickets). Another evening, we grabbed dinner and did the architecture tour. Once the conference was over, we moved to an AirBNB and stayed in Chicago another 4 days.
Overall, it was good. I didn’t feel distracted or as though I got less out of the conference. DH is a SAHD, so he was not juggling his own work stuff, and he fully understood that I needed to do what I needed to do.
Anon says
for anyone who’s kid has had ear tubes, how long did you wait until you took the kid swimming? And did you use any type of ear plugs?
Anon says
My ENT said the main concern is with ponds/lakes – basically, untreated water that doesn’t move much (so the ocean, pools, the bath were all okay). Also, the issue is with water being forcefully propelled into the ear – so, diving into water vs being splashed. We did buy my toddler a headband to put over his ears but never used it.
Anonymous says
My kid had weekly swim lessons with her tubes, plus we have a pool at home. We found soft silicone ear plugs that were really easy to put in, then she wore a band over just to keep her from pulling them out. The band was neoprene and velcro and so, so easy to put on.
Anon says
For those of you who hired a postpartum doula, what did you have her do? What schedule did you find most useful? Thanks!
Anonymous says
I had mine come 2 hours, 3 times a week. Generally she would immediately take care of the babies so I could get a long shower. Once I was out of the shower, she would gather up and do baby laundry and then either prep dinner while I nursed or I prepped dinner while she watched the babies. Depending on what I wanted. Restock the change table. We tried to time it that she would help me settle the babies in the last 15-30 minutes of her visit so I could nap after she left. Sometimes I napped when she was there but generally I liked talking to another adult. Like she would rock one to sleep while I nursed the other (mine wouldn’t tandem feed).
Early on she helped with pumping and latch as well. She also helped me figure out the baby wrap and get comfortable with baby wearing which was a huge help when I had twins. Once a week she would go with me to the breastfeeding clinic to get the babies weighed and meet with the lactation consultants. After 2-3 times I felt comfortable to take them on my own.
It was so great. I remember one rough day literally crying to my husband before he left for work and saying ‘ I just want Jane, she’s the only one focused on me.’ DH was trying but it was a big adjustment for us, he’s a great dad but not intuitive with infants like he is with toddlers/preschoolers, and it was so great to have someone solely focused on what I needed.