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This Halogen top comes in black, red, and navy, and it looks like it could hide a multitude of sins — if you’re trying to camouflage a mummy tummy or you don’t like how the top of your thighs look — but without having too much fabric. I think the jewel neckline would be perfect for a short, little necklace. The size range is XS-XL and the top is machine washable. It’s 40% off right now, which brings the original $49 to $29. Tuck Detail Sleeveless Top Here’s a plus-size option from Eloquii. (L-all)Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
PhilanthropyGirl says
I have a very similar top in coral – and it does in deed hide a multitude of sins. Headed on over to pick up a few of these…
PhilanthropyGirl says
Or not today… the plus sized option from Eloquii is sold out.
Anon in NOVA says
Not to get personal, but are you busty? (there’s no way that’s NOT personal)
I ask because I’d like to be able to hide my tummy on bloaty days, but I’m completely flat chested like the model above. It sounds like you found the shirt flattering for your body, so I was curious if it would work for me as well. I worry that it’ll just look like I’m hiding a pregnancy
PhilanthropyGirl says
I am busty. As in, VS doesn’t carry my size busty. FWIW I have found shirts that gather to side less likely to give the pregnancy look than shirts that gather in the front.
avocado says
What’s your take on sassy feminist or political tees, for moms and/or kids?
My tween daughter has a lot of cute girl-power sports and STEM tees: think “strong is the new pretty,” tributes to pioneering women scientists, and the “more than just a princess” tee from GoldiBlox. None of them is overtly political. She is a little mini-feminist with definite views of her own, and these are her own wardrobe choices (although I must admit that I do encourage them). Both of us also wear shirts with sayings like “love the earth” and “eat local.”
I am in love with the tee that someone linked to on the main s!te a couple of days ago that lists the names of the four female Supreme Court justices, and I’m considering buying it for my daughter and/or me. It somehow seems like a step too far, though. I am worried that if I send her to middle school wearing that shirt in our very red neighborhood, it will influence teachers’ attitudes in a negative way that the more neutral “girl power” stuff won’t. My concern about wearing it myself is that it would come across as juvenile, undignified, or even hostile. But it would make me feel soooo good to wear it. Perspectives? I’m probably way overthinking this.
Anonymous says
I know you didn’t mean it this way, but how sad is it that wearing a shirt with the names of the (only) 4 female SCOTUS justices is considered a political statement? Since when did cheering on women become a political statement? My two cents: if anyone sees it as a political statement, it’s not someone I would want to have a significant influence on my child anyway.
Signed, someone who bought her niece a “When they go low, we go high” shirt because that’s what we should be teaching our kids anyway (and screw anyone who thinks it’s a political statement)
avocado says
Agree–I don’t think it’s a political statement, but many people I know would perceive it that way.
Anonymous says
My perspective (to be taken with a grain of salt, because my oldest is 4) is to leave shirts and so forth with political (or really any) slogans or messages up to kids to decide (unless they are babies — then all bets are off). I don’t like the idea of my kid having messages forced on him, trying to explain why his shirt says what it says, or getting into discussions or arguments with other kids based on some message his parents decided he ought to wear on his body. That said, it sounds like your daughter is old enough to understand what SCOTUS justices do, so maybe ask her if she wants the shirt? THAT said, I live in a dark blue city but might think twice about this if it might influence teachers’ attitudes toward her. I’m fine saying I don’t care about what people might think of *my* shirt, but teens and pre-teens have enough battles to fight.
mascot says
This is my take too. As a parent to a younger child, this mostly means I’ve avoided any character shirts unless specifically requested by my child. As he gets older, he may get asked to “defend” his choice so I want him to be prepared to articulate how he feels and why.
CLMom says
In the same vein, how do you handle when the child doesn’t understand the words say? Some phrases ought to be explained. For example, recently a female junior higher wore a Netflix & Chill shirt. I think she really just likes the show on the Netflix and binge watching them, and was not trying to communicate the subtext. However, there is a meaning behind that phrase, which is much more than just Orange is the New Black or Stranger Things…
avocado says
Oh, yikes. I didn’t even know that was a saying or that it had a subtext. I am going to have to start googling everything now that my kid is getting older.
Another BigLaw Parent says
I had to google that too. Yikes! That reminds me of a friend whose school mascot was a beaver and so they made things at the school store that said “beaver fever.” She was mortified when her parents told her the subtext and never wore the school sports bag with that slogan again. :(
TK says
Depends. Has *she* asked to wear something like that? Do you trust that she could explain to people what the shirt means and why she likes it? If not – perhaps she’s too young – then there might be a risk.
But if she wants it, is proud to wear it, and can stand up for herself, then wearing the shirt might give her some good early lessons.
When I was 11 or 12 I started wearing shirts signaling support for LGBTQ causes to church after they kicked out my favorite youth group leader once they found out she was gay … I definitely got the side eye from some of the adults, and I doubt I changed anyone’s mind, but it made me feel good / proud to wear it and to explain why whenever anyone asked me about it.
CPA Lady says
I live in a red state too. I don’t think you’re overthinking it. It’s a weird time and people are really polarized.
I felt a little weird taking my 2 year old daughter to the march in our city and putting her in a t-shirt with the feminist fist symbol on the back. The front of the shirt said “the future is female” which didn’t give me the same “is this questionable?” feeling. My concern was that I was using my child, who is too young to understand political movements, as a billboard for my beliefs. I think it’s different when your kid is old enough to ask to wear things herself. Maybe show your daughter the shirt and ask her what she thinks about it?
FWIW, I have considered getting myself a political shirt. But I think I’d be too uncomfortable wearing it to enjoy it.
Anon in NOVA says
I grew up in a red state and I, too, don’t think she’s overthinking it. It’s really parental preference. I’d like to say I would err on the side of using it to teach my child to not be ashamed of their beliefs- especially ones grounded in equality- but in all honesty I’d probably err on the side of “none of your teachers are going to like this and they’re going to look at you differently, so this may be a weekend shirt”. That lesson could be viewed through the lens of treating school like a kid’s job. You can’t wear a political shirt to work (most places), or if you can it would likely be considered unprofessional. If you treat school like a job, then the same rules apply.
What I’m saying is I see the merit to both sides, and I don’t think either one is wrong. Least helpful comment ever :)
Anon says
This. School is their job. Just like I don’t wear my political shirts to work, they don’t wear theirs to school. (I do let them wear “Born to Lead” princess Elena shirts and “Forget Football, I want to be an Astrophysicist” shirts.)
That said, on the weekend if they want to rock a political shirt, and can pick it out themselves, I’m okay with it.
And now I’m off to find this female SCOTUS shirt for myself…
avocado says
teespring dot com
the style is called “Female Supreme Court Justices Rock”
avocado says
To be clear, I would definitely not get her the shirt unless she wanted it. She did want a shirt from the March, and I was afraid to buy that one.
Anonymous says
Anon from 10:01 here. Your daughter sounds awesome. If she understands the political climate of your town and still wants to do this, I say go for it. My sister was the same growing up, and she has turned into a bad *ss grown woman.
avocado says
She is quite the little character! It may have something to do with the fact that I was in grad school during her formative years.
Anonymous says
I see your concern. I agree with anon that if she understands the political climate of your town and still wants it, I’d do it. It could be a weekend shirt initially to feel out response.
I do think that if she intentionally wants to make a political point, promoting female SCOTUS members seems like a very school-appropriate way to do so. It would be hard for the admin to officially claim it was inappropriate – although in my blue state, kids were sent home if they were wearing MAGA wear with the argument that who disagrees with making America great? so our current day defies logic.
Anononymous says
As a red state escapee, this is what pajama shirts are for. I had a SERIOUS collection of “Save the Earth” shirts when I was your daughters age in the early 90s (which I picked out and occasionally bought myself). I also had a lot of posters on my bedroom walls. (Only friends had access to my bedroom, of course.) Get yourself a mug, buy her a poster, dedicate her (and your) most political shirts to bedtime / at home workouts.
Your home should be a sanctuary that lifts your spirits, if that includes politics, go for it!
avocado says
I like the pajama shirt idea!
Anonymous says
This is what I do as an adult. Govt job so can’t be political but at home on weekends or nighttime it’s all HRC shirts or feminist slogan ones. Just ordered a ‘Nevertheless she persisted”.
DH was a little overly excited at my new ‘nasty woman’ shirt…
SC says
Take this with a grain of salt because I have an almost-2-year-old son, but my approach is to leave any slogan or characters shirts for the weekend and/or pajamas. Shirts for school can be solid colors, patterns, or generic images. That might be too extreme for an older child who understands the implications of the messages on the shirt, though.
rosie says
Has anyone found that prenatal yoga (or yoga in general) makes nausea worse?
anon says
pregnancy nausea? I found that exercise oddly did not make my pregnancy nausea worse. It didn’t make it better either, but I had to abandon nausea as an excuse.
SC says
I found that being hot and weird smells made my pregnancy nausea worse. Not sure where you’re doing prenatal yoga (home or studio), but maybe the room is too warm, or there’s too much of a gym/sweat smell, or you’re pushing yourself too hard and getting overheated? Yoga did not make my pregnancy nausea worse, but I was too nauseous from about 6 weeks to 16 weeks to actually do much, or any, yoga until well into my second trimester.
rosie says
Thanks! I went to a studio that generally seemed nice (was hot, but I put my mat by the door that was airing it out and was generally ok during the class). I have had nausea since the beginning, haven’t been puking nearly as much since going on diclegis around 9w or so (and also able to eat more), but puked the night after the yoga class for the first time in 7 weeks (currently 27w), so wondering how much the class might have contributed. Definitely felt ok while I was doing it, it wasn’t until I got in bed and was trying to get comfortable to sleep that I felt sick.
HSAL says
I’d give it another try if you otherwise liked it – if you felt all right during the class itself, the sickness could be unrelated.
avocado says
I had hyperemesis and heat, smells, and time of day made a big difference. My nausea was worse in the evening, so I had to exercise early in the day. Evening yoga would definitely have made me puke, but during the class, not afterwards.
Pigpen's Mama says
Yay Friday — I’m not sure if the LO had three seperate tantrums trying to get out the door this morning, or it was one long continuous tantrum. Also, I’m about ready to burn her dang rainboots that she insists on wearing whenever she remembers they exist…
And thanks to who ever posted the app recommendations the other day — kiddo had fun playing with the Friskies fish app while sitting on the potty! There’s also one with bugs. Not just for cats anymore!
EP-er says
We went through the rain boot phase, too! I let her wear them — I figure if her feet are dry, who cares? Pink tu-tu dress and red robot rain boots? Go right ahead, if it means we are out the door.
Honestly — mornings can be brutal. I hope this phase passes for you quickly!
AEK says
My guy only wants his rain boots, too! Shame on me for finding cute ones with designs I knew he would love. Should have looked for some plain brown rubber…
GCA says
Oh toddlers. Capricious and volatile and irrational and so hilarious. We haven’t got to the rain boot phase yet, but each morning goes something like:
“Do you want to wear your boots or your shoes?”
“Boots”
(I grab the boots)
“No, shoes”
(I put the boots down and reach for the shoes)
“Boots!”
V.violet says
+1 every day of my life at the moment. Have started referring to this as #toddlergames
Anon says
Suggestions for business casual maternity wear that I can buy in store? So far, I’ve hit up Kohl’s, Target and Gap and found nothing but denim, maxi dresses and cotton t-shirts. I ordered a few staples from Gap online about a week ago but it has yet to even ship and my current pants are getting a more and more uncomfortable at 17 weeks. For what it’s worth, my local Motherhood Maternity is tiny and seemingly focused on leggings and super short dresses at the moment. I’m getting desperate as my body can be kind of difficult to fit (hence why I’d prefer to buy things inshore/be able to try them on). Do these stores, in a major city, no less, think that women who work in professional settings just don’t get pregnant anymore or something?
K. says
You might try Amazon–at least they have free returns!
CLMom says
I have regretted nearly every Amazon clothing purchase I have made.
Anonymous says
Many H&Ms have maternity clothes in-store, as does Old Navy. Call ahead to find out whether they carry maternity in a particular store.
Anon in NOVA says
Second the Old Navy suggestion. Only certain stores carry maternity in store, so call ahead. I don’t have personal experience with H&M maternity in store (there wasn’t one in my location when I was pregnant) but it’s worth checking out if you have one and have the time.
anon says
Thirding Old Navy. It’s not fancy, but I found some things that worked.
rosie says
Some Macy’s have maternity in store. I got some black pants that are business casual enough, tops, and dresses at one of my local stores–even though the section was small, they had a lot of clothes packed onto the racks, it seemed, so not a terrible selection.
I just placed an Old Navy order and got it pretty quickly (free returns). Target should have more of a selection online, and you can return to the store. Nordstrom also has maternity only, and then free returns or return in store. It seems like so much of this stuff is online now, you just have to buy several sizes and know that you’ll be returning stuff.
Anonymous says
Agree with Macy’s – weirdly, the Jessica Simpson maternity slim cut pants (in black and navy) were my go-to pants throughout my pregnancy!
NewMomAnon says
You should call around to the Macy’s in your area – typically in a large city with multiple Macy’s stores, one is the maternity hub, and it is awesome. The hub in my city carried petites, plus sizes, and extended size nursing bras. They had maternity suits, pajamas, and everything in between. I got most of my maternity clothes from there and supplemented with Target/Old Navy/H&M (Old Navy and H&M online) when I needed bigger sizes or a seasonal adjustment.
rosie says
Sorry, should have said Nordstrom has maternity *online only.
Butter says
This was the bane of my existence, and I never found a real store in a major city. I ended up ordering stuff from Gap, Loft, and Pink Blush (with some Isabella Oliver thrown in) and just sending back what didn’t work.
Leatty says
I work in a business casual environment, and my maternity wear has primarily involved Leota dresses (from Amazon), Motherhood Maternity dresses (meh), and a pair of ponte knit pants from MM. I’ve accepted that most stores in my mid-size city don’t carry reasonably priced maternity clothing (especially of a more professional nature), and that I just have to order everything online.
Anonymous says
I would order online and just be prepared to return. I agree that there is this weird message sent by maternity lines that women don’t work therefore don’t need pants that aren’t leggings? Loft seems to have some good maternity work pants at least. I loved Seraphine, but it’s expensive (and difficult to return because its coming from the UK).
rosie says
Hmmm, I think I have interpreted that message as “you’re pregnant, go ahead and wear leggings with dresses/tunics to work.” Luckily my office is not too particular about our blend of “business casual.”
Anonymous says
I am going through this same exact struggle right now. Last time I was pregnant (about 4 years ago), I was able to get a variety of styles and colors of work-appropriate maternity pants from GAP. Problem is, I wore them to death so they weren’t in decent enough shape to use again. This time, I can’t find anything. So far, I’ve just bought larger sizes in non-maternity pants and used a belly band, but I know that is not going to last me through to the end.
I’m also really struggling with maternity jeans. All that seems to be out there within a reasonable price range for someone who is in non-work attire 2 days a week are skinny jeans. I don’t look good in skinny jeans not pregnant, they certainly won’t be flattering now!
rosie says
Target for jeans? I got a pair of Liz Lange side panel bootcut jeans that have been pretty good for me so far.
Kerry says
H&M has some straight leg jeans for cheap.I got a pair of their skinny jeans and really like them.
CHJ says
Do you have a Pea in the Pod in your city? Their stuff is expensive but good for work wear.
ChiLaw says
It IS hard. I will say that I found a single pair of black ponte pants at Pea in the Pod that was worth whatever they cost. Wore them with maternity sweaters/tees under blazers/floaty blouses. Then I also got a few long sleeved dresses (that were also nursing/pumping friendly) and called it a day.
CPA Lady says
I found a surprising number of maternity clothes at a large thrift store in my city. Probably half of my maternity clothes were from the thrift store, the other half from Old Navy. I ordered most of the Old Navy stuff online but then returned what I didn’t want to the store. I got a small handful of stuff at Target. I wore non-maternity cardigans and blazers the whole pregnancy.
Lyssa says
I found it really, really hard to find anything at brick and mortar stores. My best strategy was to go to the Target website and order literally everything that looked even remotely good – over $400 worth – and then return (in store) everything that I didn’t like (around half). That, plus some pick ups here and there in stores and online when I did see something that I liked, covered my needs for 2 pregnancies.
(Note – don’t pay for this with Paypal – you can return, but only for store credit. But it’s Target, so it’s not like it didn’t get used.)
Patty Mayonnaise says
Any suggestions for a little V-day treat for my husband? We’re expecting our first baby in about a month and I was thinking of matching dad & baby socks or something like that, but I haven’t really found any… Thanks, ladies!!
Artemis says
Pair of Thieves socks! Company website and Target online. Sets of Dad-baby or Dad-kid matching socks in different sizes and patterns. Packaged together. So cute. For Christmas I gave my husband a set for each of our kids. I’m pretty sure it was his favorite gift.
Anonymous says
Does he have a favorite sports team? They often have baby gear too so the socks wouldn’t match exactly but you could get them both team X socks.
Anon says
Go to etsy and type in “dad and baby”. Lots of cute coordinating shirts/onesies – I love the one that is Daddysaurus Rex and Babysaurus Rex. You can also find matching slippers, beanies, etc.
H says
Maybe a matching t-shirt and onesie from his alma mater?
Jax says
Sharing a working mom victory…
My 5th grader has a few homework papers that parents are supposed to “sign off” on to verify that the work was done. In social studies, the teacher has been grading study guides based on whether they are signed or not. Signed = full credit. Unsigned = zero + punches on behavior cards.
I had a very lengthy conversation about it with the teacher, who stuck to her grading methods and would not budge. So then I escalated it to the school principals in an email, citing the school district’s own policy on homework to be done “independently and without parent’s constant direction and supervision” and then I added the state code’s chapter on student assessment, pointing out that grading based on a parent signature isn’t grading a student’s work or a student’s skill set–it’s grading parental involvement.
I strongly feel that 1.) not all public school kids have an involved parent at home, or a parent who is home during “homework” hours, or a parent who is approachable–we have no idea what environment these kids are growing up in! 2.) Grading based on parental involvement is only rewarding privilege. 3.) It’s a lazy way for a teacher to grade homework as he/she isn’t grading the actual substance of the work, just scanning for a signature. 4.) Parent signatures seem to be encroaching every speck of homework that comes home, and like my 5th grader says, “It feels like they don’t even trust us!” It’s killing the student’s sense of independence and ownership over their own work, and placing way too much pressure on parents to be responsible for their kid’s grades.
The principals took my email and consulted with other elementary school principals in the district, and they all agreed with me! They are going to talk to their teachers, see who is grading (or punishing with no recess, etc.) for missing parent signatures, and help them work out other ways that they can encourage kids to do their work without parent signatures! The principal even said, “I’m 100% against this business of taking a kid’s recess away over a missing signature. That stops today.”
This felt like a huge victory for every kid (and busy parent) in my school district. I’m just really excited!
CHJ says
Wow, good for you for fighting this! I completely agree with all your points – it is so unfair to children to judge their homework based on whether a parent signs it.
avocado says
Good for you! As the parent of a 5th-grader whose homework is often graded on completion (with the expectation that the parents have checked it and reviewed the wrong answers with the child) or the presence of a parental signature, I offer you my heartfelt admiration!
Anonymous says
That’s fantastic!! Good work mama!
Closet Redux says
Wonderful, thank you!
Anonymous says
Good for you. I made a fuss with the principal about snowclearing not so much for myself (drives kid to school) but for a mom I see walking with three kids down the street and across the slippery parking lot all the time. Salt the MFing parking lot and walk ways. I was feeling self conscious about being ‘that mom’ but I’m glad you posted about this because it’s a good reminder that those of us in positions to stick up for each other, should try to do so. Off to write a note to my kid’s teacher explaining why my kindergartener is not going to be doing all the assigned homework after all day in full day kindergarten.
Em says
Good for you! I have been “that woman” in several situations at my company because I know I have the job security to push back on BS policies/treatment, whereas most of the women in non-management roles don’t.
Momata says
I want to be you when I grow up! Congratulations. You did a very good thing and did it well.
Jax says
Please send in notes and advocate for change! Principals mostly leave the teachers to make their own rules and grading standards for their classes. The teachers submit lesson plans and grades every week, but the principal isn’t aware of every rule or grading method the teacher is using UNLESS a parent questions it. These principals weren’t aware that parent signatures were being graded, but now that they are, they are making school wide changes.
Start with the teacher, then move up as needed. Principal. Superintendent. Then school board. The worst that can happen is they say no, and the policy stays the same. But 90% of the time, they are going to be more than happy to talk with you about improving the school, and they are going to be thrilled that you care.
Betty says
Absolutely yes to this!! My husband is an elementary school principal. He is not in every classroom all day, every day, and he cannot know everything that goes on. But he does read every email that comes in to his inbox. He responds to every parent that reaches out to him. He genuinely cares about the kids in his school (and knows each of their 450 names). Please don’t worry about being “that parent.” If you are emailing with a genuine concern, they want to hear.
And FWIW: I would go crazy over this type of requirement.
Anon in NOVA says
Great job! Yes, it IS a victory for a lot of kids. Way to go!
I feel very strongly about not punishing children for having busy parents, or for a lack of parental involvement. I almost fought this fight when my son was in Kindergarten- in one month there were 7 different occasions that required a costume or a special colored shirt we didn’t already own. We made it work (thanks amazon prime!) but I had some serious equity concerns. Yes, you can “make your own” cape out of a towel for superhero day, but a kid is bound to feel bad when they see the other kids’ full on superhero costumes.
I think a lot of this unintentionally separates the “haves” from the “have-nots” very early on, which is unfair. Putting a kindergarten child in the position to be the only one without a fancy cape, or not having a cape at all, is going to give them negative feelings about school from an early age. Often, the ones with that lack of family support are the ones who need an extra boost- NOT put in a position where they feel bad.
Sorry, that was not a very coherent rant. tl;dr GO YOU! I’ve had the same feelings and regret not acting on them. You may have made a real difference in how some children at that school feel about education going forward. great job!
Betty says
Our school’s PTO fundraiser this past fall was a pay-to-enter cooking contest. Each kid (this is a K-2 school) was supposed to make 250 bite sized entrees or desserts and submit an entrance fee. One evening from 5-7pm, you were supposed to set up a booth, taste all the different offerings, and vote. Or, if you declined to cook, you could buy voting tickets day-of. How on earth is a K-2 kid supposed to do this unless they have a parent able to devote a serious amount of time to this? This occurred in the middle of a family health crisis, so I didn’t have the energy to say a very loud WTF, but I wish that I had…
Anon in NOVA says
Have you read “the year of yes”? I really didn’t think I would be into it (it sounds too much like an inspirational lifestyle book) but it was SO GOOD. Shonda Rhimes talks about accidentally screaming “WHAT THE F**K?!” at a school assembly when the head of the PTA said all items for the bake sale needed to be homemade- no store bought. I laughed out loud on the plane when i read it :)
Marilla says
This is incredible – thank you for doing this for all the kids in your district :)
NewMomAnon says
*shudder* to that policy. I had a friend growing up with an abusive, alcoholic father and a mother working three jobs to support his addiction. My friend is brilliant, but a policy like this would have been guaranteed failure for her. Good for you – you probably helped more kids than you even know.
Anon 123 says
As a kid of a single dad who was loving, and attentive where it really mattered, but didn’t have a ton of time, thank you OP and other parents who push back on too much required parental involvement. You’re absolutely right that this kind of thing makes things worse for the kids who need school to be comfortable the most.
Anonymous says
This is awesome!!
GCA says
Good on you!! I’m all for involved parents, but no child should ever be penalized for lack thereof.
SC says
This is so inspiring! I agree with all of your points, and I’m glad you advocated for change! I agree that encouraging/enabling parents to be involved is great (of course!), but punishing kids both academically and behaviorally for not being able to get parental signatures is so wrong!
H says
Oh my gosh, that is so awesome that a) you brought it up and b) they listened to you. What an absolutely horrible process. My LO is only 2 but I am dreading school. Thank you on behalf of parents and students everywhere for fighting a horrible process.
Anononymous says
On the one hand yay! On the other hand, teachers really need assistants to handle grading. Like seriously, the amount of paperwork they do is absolutely nonsense, so I get why she did it.
(In my dream world, no public school classroom would ever have fewer than three adults in it at all times: master teacher, assistant teacher and grader/parent coordinator. Everybody would be happier.)
Anonymous says
Go you! I agree with every one of your points.
Aside: once in 6th grade (I still remember this 20+ years later!), I was supposed to have my parents sign my “grade update” on my midterm English grade. I did not, because I was not a conscientious child. My punishment from the teacher was to write a 1 page rhyming poem about why I didn’t get my grade update signed. I wrote one, and I don’t remember the content of it, but my mom ALSO wrote one just because she thought it was a hilarious assignment.
“A grade update can only be seen / by someone who’s swallowed a lima bean…. ”
And from then on, I got writing assignments whenever I messed up at home, too. Write a short story about what happened when a girl did not clean her room. Write a play about a girl who walked on a frozen pond and fell through the ice and DIED. Write a persuasive essay about the importance of practicing your piano lesson. I went on to be a Power of the Pen state champion, and am a d@mn good writer if I do say so, myself.
Pogo says
This is the second time I’ve seen references to public school taking away kids’ recess as a punishment. When did this start? I never recall even the worst behaved or least motivated students in my elementary school being denied recess. It seems so counterproductive.
Did I just go to an incredibly progressive school or is this a newer trend?
Pogo says
Today in comments from male coworkers about your pregnancy….
My previa still hasn’t shifted, so OB recommended I not travel. I’m fine with this, and so is everyone in my chain of command. But a male coworker overheard me talking to a female coworker about it and felt the need to say something along the lines of “Oh it’s your first baby, you’re worrying for no reason, you’ll be fine.”
Obviously, he doesn’t know my medical history (like that I’ve had bleeding already, and additionally have a clotting disorder that makes it even more worrisome), but that’s the point. Why feel the need to belittle someone else’s doctor’s recommendation without 1) being a doctor or 2) knowing the full story.
To be fair people do this with non-pregnant people’s illnesses all the time (“Oh my cousin had that, and she tried acupuncture and now she’s cured….”) so it’s not a pregnancy specific-thing.
Anon in NOVA says
It’s not a pregnancy-specific thing, but I found my reaction to this sort of thing was much more… heightened? when I was pregnant. Comments and opinions just seemed amplified to me all the time. If someone relayed to me half the stuff I got upset over when I was pregnant, I’d be bewildered as to why they think it’s a big deal! (if it weren’t for the fact I remember it all being a big deal at the time)
This isn’t to say it’s not frustrating or a big deal, I’m just commiserating over how it’s ESPECIALLY annoying when you’re pregnant. And when a man does it.
Anononymous says
I just had a tendency to smile and go TMI on people. “You’re so right EXCEPT…” and then shame them as much as possible for it. With bleeding and a male co-worker I would have stood uncomfortably close and made sure to ruin his lunch. (But I am a bad person.)
ChiLaw says
It’s just astounding how everyone seems to have missed this lesson in manners. It’s not your f-ing business, people!
rosie says
It’s not pregnancy-specific, but I think it may be more common in pregnancy because (1) pregnancy is common (so most people will feel like they have “helpful” advice based on their own pregnancy, their spouse’s, their friend’s, etc.), and (2) pregnancy seems to take away some of the usual boundaries people tend to have about making comments about other people’s bodies, habits, and health.
Anonymous says
“Thanks but I think I’ll trust my doctor’s recommendation over yours as he/she is familiar with my specific situation/medical history/test results/scary sounding latin name for issue.”
Anonymous says
This also works for non- pregnancy medical commentary.
And ugh. Sorry you had to deal with that.
Pogo says
Thanks all – I think it pissed me off more than anything that it was a man commenting on this and awoke the angry feminist in me that generally does not need any man’s opinion on my uterus or its contents.