Washable Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Roz & Ali Scuba Sheath Dress

Dressbarn is not usually where I look for things to feature, but I was browsing over there for our recent Corporette roundup on the best workwear for size 16 and beyond and thought that this dress looked great. It’s got a slightly interesting neckline, which can sometimes be a bad thing if you’re buying from a store like Dressbarn, but I think this dress is so plain and simple, it’s a good thing here. I like that it’s fully lined and has slight cap sleeves, and that it’s machine washable. The red only has one size left (which is a good sign), but the blue has sizes 4-16 for just $48. Roz & Ali Scuba Sheath Dress

Here’s a plus-size option — while it’s not labeled machine washable, it’s dry clean and not “dry clean only.”

Looking for other washable workwear? See all of our recent recommendations for washable clothes for work, or check out our roundup of the best brands for washable workwear.

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Comments

  1. Marilla says:

    Labeling question for kid clothes – this is probably super basic, but I should just go with a last name label to allow reuse between kids, right? I know Mabel’s Labels is a popular company – any other (cheaper?) favourites?

    • Anonymous says:

      Yep, that’s my approach. I just write on the tag with a sharpie.

    • mascot says:

      We use NameBubbles and they last forever. You can catch them on sale if you are on the mailing list. I only label outerwear, shoes, bags, bottles, towels, etc- things that get taken off and put down. I’ve bought and sold some clothes secondhand so I don’t like writing on clothing. But, its fine for things that will only ever be used by your family.

      • Closet Redux says:

        Second the rec for NameBubbles, but agree that these things are stupidly expensive.

      • NewMomAnon says:

        I’ve been able to peel off my Namebubbles stickers when I went to donate them. Somehow they still stayed on through laundry, dishwashing, etc. Magic.

        FWIW, I just put kiddo’s first name on the labels because I read somewhere that potential kidnappers could theoretically find too much of a kid’s info on their clothing labels and use that to manipulate the kid. In retrospect, I have no idea how they would get close enough to see a label inside kiddo’s clothes, but….that’s my policy.

      • lucy stone says:

        Also just bought NameBubbles for bottles. They seem to be holding up well so far. Our daughter’s daycare requires her full name on bottles so that’s what we have.

    • I did not think this through when labeling everything for kid #1, lol.

      • Legally Brunette says:

        LOL. Me neither! So now kid #2 is wearing hand me downs with big brother’s name on them.

        • anne-on says:

          Ha, yup, our extended family (cousins, 2nd cousins) and neighbors all now have hand me downs with our kids name on them. Oh well, free clothes are free ;)

          • Edna Mazur says:

            We have a hat with a cousin’s kid’s name on it. We leave it there because we are sentimental :)

    • BTanon says:

      We use Name Bubbles and the Last Name Only approach. It seemed like a good idea, but the daycare teachers hated it, especially at the beginning of the year when they were trying to learn all the kids’ names. We didn’t change our approach, but something to consider. Not clothing related, but recommend Inchbug bands for bottles and sippy cups.

    • Marilla says:

      Thanks all! NameBubbles look cheaper. Also see some potential options on Etsy. I foresee an ironing extravaganza during my next day off :)

      • I bought mine off Etsy (MeYDecals) and they were, by far, cheaper than NameBubbles. I chose the stick-on ones and they’ve held up well.

      • whitney says:

        The stick-on ones really do hold up. I don’t think I’ve had one fall off. Definitely don’t mess with all that ironing. We used Oliver’s Labels.

  2. New England Trip says:

    I’m in LA planning a vacation in New England in mid-October. I will have a 2 year old. We intend to travel from city to city exploring and enjoying the foliage. My concern is there will not be enough to “do” with the toddler, or that going form Boston to Portland to New Hampshire (suggestions?) to Providence (etc) will be too much car time.
    Do you have suggestions on what sites to see in New England and what might entertain the kiddo? Perhaps visiting a farm?

    • avocado says:

      The New England Aquarium in Boston is great for kids, as is the science museum.

      • +1 Two year old niece lasted like five hours at the science museum. We did the regular parts of the museum first, then there’s like this “little kids only” section that we did for the last hour (they only let so many kids in at a time, so you have to put your name on a list to get in). There was lots for little ones to play with, hands on, they made an art project, etc.

    • anne-on says:

      How long are you planning on staying? And where will you fly in/out of? Providence is about an hour south of Boston, while the other areas are north, so I’d say pick a direction (north or south) and focus that way?
      You know your kiddo best, but that strikes me as kind of a lot of driving. If it were me, I’d pick maybe 1 or 2 additional destinations aside from Boston (and there is a LOT to do in Boston with kiddos). In Boston I’d definitely do the children’s museum, the aquarium, a duck boat tour, walking through the commons and the gardens with your kiddo and maybe the chocolate high tea at the Lagham if your kiddo is well behaved (and kids under 5 are free!)
      I also love VT, and Brattleboro and some other quaint towns are very close by – lots of farms/leaves/farm stands. We loooove south burlington VT – the magic hat brewery and simon pearce factory both have beautiful spaces for tours with lots of cool places to eat and things to see.

      • New England Trip says:

        Likely staying a week. Hubby and I have done Boston before, so we are most likely using Boston as our place to fly in/out, but with the bulk of time spent in VT, NH, ME, etc.

        • avocado says:

          If you are planning to visit Providence, I’d consider using that airport instead of Boston. So much easier and often less expensive.

          • New England Trip says:

            I will look into it. Thank you!

          • Ditto to MHT if you’re considering NH for part of it – infinitely easier than Boston. I don’t know if PVD has directs from LAX but I know MHT doesn’t.

            For BOS, you can consider Long Beach bc JetBlue has a direct (I think) to BOS. When DH does LA he often opts for the Long Beach JetBlue flights, says they tend to be less crowded/nicer than BOS-LAX flights.

          • rosie says:

            Yes, consider one of the alternate airports. It sounds like you are renting a car? You have to take a shuttle at BOS, and it can get really busy at the counters. PVD is somewhat of a hike to get the car, but definitely preferable to BOS in my opinion. MHT and Portland are super easy car rentals, in my experience–short walk, not crowded…I remember one time at MHT it was so quick and they pulled the car right around for me. Also, we found that doing a one-way car rental where you return to a different airport is actually cheaper in some cases (we did PVD to BDL-Hartford, and it was significantly cheaper than if we had returned to PVD)–so if doing that will save you some driving, definitely look into it.

    • If you use Boston as your base, you could also head west to the Berkshires for day trips – MassMoCA is amazing and the space seems kid-friendly (I haven’t been since pre-kids), and there would be places to go apple picking, etc. nearby. Plus as you get further west the leaves turn earlier, so somewhere between Boston and western Mass you are guaranteed to find peak color.

      • MASS MoCA is a great way to introduce modern art to little kids. The museum is very kid-friendly and has a dedicated area for kids. The Porches is a nearby boutique hotel with an outdoor heated pool.

      • I love Western MA, but that is a loooong day trip from Boston.

    • Drumlin Farm out in Lincoln, about 45min outside Boston, is a great farm experience for kids. It’s a working farm and wildlife sanctuary with lots of animals. And depending on when exactly you’re in the area, consider checking out the Topsfield County Fair, too.

      Boston to Portland is a pretty long trip for a kid! It spanned my son’s entire naptime once.

    • Butter says:

      How long will the trip be? I think if a week then it’s fine – Portland is less than 2 hours from Boston, and Providence the same. You’ll get lots of recommendations for things to do in the city, but here are some ideas for outside the city:

      – Check out the Trustees of Reservations for inspiration and places to visit in Massachusetts and Rhode Island. It’s a network of historic farms, parks, trails, and sites, all well taken care of. Some of my favorites include Appleton Farms in Hamilton (historic farm, animals, and lovely trails) and Castle Hill on the Crane Estate (mansion, grounds, ocean).

      – The MA state parks are lovely too. Maudslay for stone bridges and Great Brook for ice cream are my favs.

      – In Portland consider hopping on the mail boat for a cheap way to see the islands that surround the city. And the Well at Jordan’s Farm is a wonderful place to get dinner for farm to table food.

      As you can see, I’m partial to the country. The city is great but if you’re flying from LA to New England in October, I’d try to take advantage of the season and do things you can’t do the rest of the year.

      • New England Trip says:

        As a city gal, I don’t fully understand what there is to do in the countryside. Do you have additional country suggestions? The ones you’ve listed above as excellent, so I would love to hear more.

        • In October you can do apple picking! Shelburne Farm in Stow is very kid-centric, with petting zoo, horseback rides, hayrides, cider donuts and hot chocolate, etc. It’s insane on the weekends but if you’re on vacation and could do a weekday it would be fun.

          Walden and deCordova are a good combo of close to Boston outdoorsy stuff. You can picnic on the grounds at deCordova, and it’s really pretty in the fall. Walden has some nice, easy hikes and a little info center w/ park rangers (I admit I’ve never actually gone in, but I assume they teach the kids stuff about Thoreau? And nature?)

          DeCordova is both a sculpture park and a museum, but again – I think I’ve only done the outside portion when I’ve gone. It’s good to have both indoor/outdoor options with kiddo, depending on weather and their attention span. I think kids are allowed to climb on most of the art at DeCordova.

          • Could also do Honeypot hill orchard in stow vs Shelburne. It’s less crazy on weekends, better parking, and real bathrooms (Shelburne only has porta potties). MMM cider donuts.

        • Butter says:

          A lot of my favorite country things still revolve around food, ha. Visiting cheesemakers/dairy farms/ice cream places, farm-to-table restaurants/farmstands, cidermakers or rural breweries (VT beeeeeeeer!!!). I love a leisurely hike, or just a trail walk. Popping into general stores in little towns. Driving the long way – e.g. the Kancamagus in NH is gorgeous. Down in Rhode Island I’m partial to what some are now calling the Farm Coast. Four Corners in Tiverton for sandwiches and ice cream, and there are a few wineries on that same road that are lovely. There’s so much!

          • There are also orchards in “the farm coast” for apple picking. Check out Little Compton, my sister lives there and she had an orchard next door- can’t think of the name. Low key and kid friendly.

    • Portland is a great, kid-friendly small city! It is a 2 hour drive from Boston (barring major traffic). Portland has a Children’s Museum, which is much smaller than Boston’s but is still fun. The Old Port is great to walk around, and you can take one of the Casco Bay ferries to go around the bay and view the islands. Smiling Hill Farm is a year-round hit and just outside of Portland. There are local, easy to reach gorgeous beaches near Portland. Freeport is about 20-30 minutes north of Portland. Freeport has good outlet shopping and is the home of LLBean (store is open 24 hours). LLBean has indoor fish ponds and is fun to explore with toddlers. The drive from Portland to Freeport up Rt 1 is gorgeous in the fall. From Portland, you can also head northwest to New Hampshire or Vermont for a scenic drive. Let me know if you would like additional recommendations.

      • New England Trip says:

        Yes, I would like additional recommendations. Especially if there are things to do along the journey from one city to the next. And, we’re open to staying in a smaller town, too.

        • I would say Chauncy Creek for lobsters, but they close after Columbus Day. We usually stop there on the way up to Maine.

          In Portland: Holy Donut, Duck Fat, Mount Desert Ice Cream… and all of the breweries!!! Rising Tide in the summer is super kid friendly (seriously, all the hipsters with all the toddlers) because there’s outdoor seating, but not sure about the fall. Shipyard is famous for their pumpkin, but I remember the “tour” being kinda lame? It’s been years though.

    • shortperson says:

      my 2yo loved the duckling sculpture in the boston public garden. we prepared for the trip by reading make way for ducklings over and over.

  3. lunch box?? says:

    I know this gets covered regularly, but I need fresh info. My son just moved into the 1 year old room at daycare. I need a lunch box that will fit both an ice pack and multiple tupperware containers (bonus if it also fits milk cup, but they will refrigerate that). My older son uses a Pack-It (which doesn’t need a separate ice pack), and we love it, but it’s not wide enough for all the tupperware containers. We are currently using a crocodile creek square box and I can’t zip it all the way up. I don’t think I will like the bento box. Ideas?

    • Anon in NYC says:

      We put my daughter’s stuff in a Built neoprene lunch tote. We can fit 1-2 thermoses in there (Thermos Foogo – easier with just 1 though), a cup, a several Oxo Tot Blocks (2-3 big ones and 2 small ones). It’s stretchy so it can accommodate being slightly stuffed.

    • I was about to suggest PackIt when I got to the line about you using it – but have you checked other sizes? They have a bunch of different styles and I bet one would fit your tupperware.

    • PinkKeyboard says:

      We use the skip hop lunch tote and Rubbermaid lunchblox (the tall version). I can also squeeze a thermos straw sippy in the top. I like the lunch blox because it all locks together, has an included ice pack, and provides 3 containers to put stuff in. Plus it’s all pretty cheap.

    • lunch box?? says:

      Thanks, everyone. I use a neoprene tote, but it didn’t even occur to me to try that for him! It also didn’t occur to me to check different sizes on the PackIt. Excellent!

  4. Anonymous says:

    Ugh, this is as detailed as I can get, but husband made a mistake at work that ruffled feathers. It is related to something within his control that has come up before. I am trying hard to balance my anxiety about the implications of the mistake (it should be okay, hopefully just an embarrassing conversation at his work, but who knows), anger at him for letting it happen again, and knowing that he feels terrible and has a tendency to shame spiral. Not looking for anything specific, just trying to sort out my own anxiety and anger right now.

    • Why is this any of your business?

      • Famouscait says:

        It’s her concern because she says it is. We are supportive on this board; please play along accordingly.

      • Anonymous says:

        Not helpful. As he is my husband, our lives are intricately connected — financially and emotionally. If either of us experiences job losses or set-backs, it impacts our kids and our joint contributions to the household. Do you not have a partner?

      • Um, because it’s something that directly affects her and someone she loves?

        Anon, I’ve been through something similar and totally commiserate. The anxiety of worrying about your husband’s feelings/stress level (which, S, is part of empathy and love), your financials, and your resentment for him possibly putting you both in jeopardy over what sounds like an avoidable mistake, are completely understandable.
        Still, my best (unsolicited!) advice is to express only the empathy/ love and, with him, hold your tongue about your own anxiety & anger. His mistake cannot be undone now, and all you can do by expressing you other reactions is shame him or stress him out more. Confide in a friend, a family member, us, but I think you should not bring your reaction into it when it comes to your husband.

        • Anonymous says:

          Helpful, helpful, helpful. Thanks for the compassion. You nailed why I’m anxious, but unleashing it on him isn’t going to help now.

    • The most graceful thing you can do is be compassionate to him. And if you have to freak out, do it in person with a girlfriend (not in writing and not where he can overhear you. Ask me how I know).

      The thing my husband can do that makes me love him the least and dislike him the most is kicking me when I am down. I know when I make a mistake. I know when I’ve made the same mistake twice. I know my flaws. I beat myself up harder than anyone ever has over them. And when I tell him about a mistake I’ve made, I’m hoping for compassion from him. So when he beats me up about the mistake too and says something like “well why didn’t you just x?” or “its not that hard to not screw up y” or whatever, it makes me incredibly angry and hurt.

      I assume your husband told you about this mistake, otherwise you wouldn’t know about it happening? He’s showing your vulnerability. Please be compassionate.

      • *showing YOU vulnerability

      • Anonymous says:

        Thank you — also very helpful. Trying to breathe out — I think it will be okay, but the first days are the worst. I know he’s beating the [email protected] out of himself, and you are right, he needs support right now. Also, I need to remember he is amazing at this when I’m the one who has screwed up.

      • Frozen Peach says:

        This is great advice. And I second venting your own worries about how it impacts you to someone safe and trustworthy other than your spouse.

        Also, hugs.

  5. Nellie says:

    Someone from my local moms’ Facebook group just offered up “10-11 perineal ice packs from my recent delivery.” I’m all for recycling and reusing, but Just No.

    • Maybe they’re the disposable ones from the hospital, that you break to activate?

      • Nellie says:

        Yes, I am sure that’s what she meant, unused disposables, but I found the posting hilarious!

    • Legally Brunette says:

      Totally fine! My friend gave a bunch of hers away too to another friend and they were much appreciated. They are the disposable ones that you break to activate so not sure what the issue is. Those packs were a godsend!

      • Spirograph says:

        hahaha, but the wording is so awkward. “… from my recent delivery” definitely makes them sound used.

        “I have some extra ice packs from the hospital that I didn’t use, anyone want them?” Totally different.

    • I bought some before my delivery because I heard the hospital ones sucked (and they did) and those suckers were kind of expensive. If they were the good kind I would snap them up in a heartbeat.

    • I had no idea these were a thing. My hospital told us to fill a newborn diaper with ice from the ice machine, close it up, and apply to the area. The gel absorbed the melting ice and it worked okay. I think this was the budget version (I assume they got the diapers for free from manufacturers).

      • Edna Mazur says:

        Both hospitals in the town I live in (I’ve delivered in both) had maxi pads soaked in super strong tea. The tannin in the tea helps, along with the cold. I also never knew disposable, break to activate were a thing.

        The tea got messy, but I think it helped, for a low cost option.

    • Anon in NOVA says:

      HAHAHAHAHA i agree the wording is… awkward. That’s hilarious. I’m sure they weren’t used but, as they’d say in an Archer episode, “phrasing!”

  6. Baby screen time Recs says:

    Hi – we’ll be doing a red eye flight with our five and a half month old daughter. We’ve generally kept her away from screen time, but I’d like to download a video or app or two on our phones to occupy her if needed. Any recommendations of what will hold her attention without volume?

    • The Duck Duck Moose apps were a hit when my kids were tiny, and my kids still like them at 3 and 6.

    • Anonymous says:

      The Peekaboo series. We started with Peekaboo barn but there are many spinoffs. Very simple and volume isn’t required for our child to be fascinated. Perfect for planes.

    • I’m not sure a 5 month old will pay attention to anything, besides maybe her fingers. My 20 month old can hardly pay attention to an app. All of the commotion leading to takeoff, and white noise afterwords, will probably just induce her to sleep.

    • POSITA says:

      We had zero luck getting our little one to watch a screen at that age. I know its not what you want to hear. Has she tried Mum Mums yet? Those might be sufficiently distracting without being too messy.

    • Frozen Peach says:

      Please don’t be insulted by this (it was a godsend for our daughter at that age).

      Friskies makes a free app for cats. It’s basically fish that swim around until you tap them to “catch” them. Was the only screen thing, other than facetime, that interested my kid at all at that age.

    • Anonymous says:

      lots of photos of people she knows or herself to scroll through will also keep her entertained

    • lucy stone says:

      My daughter loves mother goose club. She watches it while getting her nebulizer treatments and can’t hear anything because the machine is so loud, but she likes the shapes. She also loves Jeopardy! and Wheel of Fortune. Mom of the year over here.

      • Anonymous says:

        +1 to Mother Goose Club. It’s basically music videos for kids so I don’t feel too guilty about the screen time.

    • Thanks all! So helpful.

  7. Onlyworkingmomintulsa says:

    My son is turning 2 in a few weeks and he loves babies. Has anyone found a boy baby doll? They seem few and far between. PB Kids has a picture of one on their website, but there isn’t one available for sale. I found one on Fat Brain, but just wondering if anyone else has had any luck?

    • I see several on Amazon. Just search for “boy baby doll.”

      • dolls says:

        this is what we did when we bought our son one. Insert feelings about searching for a boy doll instead of just a doll, but I’d like to think I’d get my daughter the blue one, too.

    • The PBK ones are made by Gotz, which are also available at: http://www.gotzusa.com/dolls/baby-dolls.html

      There are also several on the Target website.

    • Spirograph says:

      We recently got a girl doll for my 2-year old daughter, but I definitely saw a lot of boy dolls on Amazon too. My son loves the girl doll, too…

    • NewMomAnon says:

      My kiddo has a couple baby dolls, and they appear to be androgynous…unless you’re looking for something anatomically correct? At least ours are frequently dressed in whatever doll clothes we have on hand. For instance, Baby George is currently dressed in a Minnie Mouse dress with a camo vest, and Baby Kiki is wearing kiddo’s old Thomas the Tank Engine t-shirt (and nothing else, because that’s how kiddo rolls).

    • They are kind of expensive, but American Girl has them at least in the Bitty Twins category.

      • Onlyworkingmomintulsa says:

        I will tell you that on this search I came across many “real looking” dolls….creepy! Thanks all, found a couple of options on Amazon by Corolle. I’ll add that I did buy a Bitty Baby for my 4 year old daughter’s recent birthday and bought the most androgynous outfit they offered, a blue and yellow onesie, not a lot of options, but I guess the company is called American Girl after all.

    • We have the Stella baby boy and the HABA baby boy, both very big hits in our house.

      I HATE that American Girl discontinued their boy-girl Bitty Baby twins, as that would have been perfect for my two kids. Is it just that they didn’t want to make boy clothes? I don’t get it.

    • Anonymous says:

      Corelle has a great one that I highly recommend. It can even go in the bath/pool as well – super durable. It’s what my twin boys have.

    • My two year old son has a baby Corelle doll that he loves. I think it’s the “Mon Premier bebe” “Calin” style

    • Yes, the Corelle doll is great. It smells like cupcakes.

    • my boys love their Ikea babies

    • AnonMN says:

      We bought the Corelle “girl” doll in pink. In the vein that “colors are for everyone” in our house. My 3 year old son still plays with it and all the accompanying pink accessesories. The grandparents’ reaction when he opened it on his second birthday . . . priceless.

    • We just put “baby doll” into amazon and got a great one– all different races and pink, blue, or purple clothes I think. Our son has named it Baby Joe, of all names.

  8. Vacation question says:

    We are taking our first mini-vacay with our one-year-old to a resort in the U.S. We’re planning on staying on property almost the entire time (it’s got all the things, along the lines of Disney), and aren’t going to rent a car as a result. So we’re looking at uber/taxi/shuttles from the airport to the resort and vice versa.

    Silly question – we still need to haul the carseat with us, right? Outside of walking from the airport to the hotel (I joke), this is not optional, correct? I’m 99% sure that’s the answer, just checking as we start our packing list.

    • shortperson says:

      some shuttle services have carseats. i.e. there are several that shuttle folks to disney from LAX that provide carseats. i’ve also used one in boston when i knew i wouldnt need the carseat otherwise. it can’t hurt to call your hotel and ask or poke around online.

    • Famouscait says:

      We were able to travel for about 5 days without kiddo’s car seat because we could use Uber Black, which comes with a car seat. Magical. Game changer.

      • Vacation question says:

        Oooh, this could work for us. Do you know if Uber Black always comes with a car seat, or is that something you have to request?

        • There’s an option to request it. As I understand it, they only have forward facing seats.

    • NewMomAnon says:

      Uber was rolling out a car seat service in some areas as well.

      FWIW, I think taxi passengers in some areas don’t legally have to strap baby into a car seat, and I’ve never seen anyone install a car seat on a train or bus (and not sure how you would, given that they don’t have seat belts).

    • CPA Lady says:

      If you do end up deciding to bring one, might I recommend getting the Cosco Scenera? It’s like $45 at Walmart, super lightweight, and really easy to install with a seat-belt through the bottom. I probably wouldn’t use it as my every day car-seat, but we use it for the rare time we need to put a car-seat in my mom’s car, and we took it when we traveled over x-mas. We installed it forward facing in the airplane (thought it would be better to keep our 2 yo kid contained than just a lap belt) and quickly installed it rear-facing in the tiny rental car. It was light enough that I could easily carry it through the airport, and I’m not a particularly strong or fit person.

  9. Anon in NOVA says:

    What is up with postings being more… contentious than usual the past couple of days? I’m glad it always get shut down quickly, but this is such a valuable, supportive, judgement-free space that I’m surprised this is suddenly happening!

    Anyway, this dress looks nice and the neckline is fun. I would definitely want to try it on in person before trusting Dress Barn, though. (Since I’ve never gone in one and have no idea what level of quality they offer)

    • Nellie says:

      Honestly, I have been crankier and crankier over current events (to the point of near minute-by-minute obsession) and doing my best not to take it out on others, but I do take potshots more frequently when I feel this way. I think other people also do this, spewing a little negativity to get it away from ourselves.

      Basically I think our president has set a tone of such combativeness and defensiveness that we are all being poisoned.

      • Cleaning Q says:

        Agree. I get mean when I get grumpy and I get grumpy when I get scared. And I’ve been kind of scared and overwhelmed by whats going on in the world right now.

        I was the person on the main s i t e a couple days ago who had a question about the cleaning lady messing up the paint on my kitchen cabinet. One of the responses asked me how I could function in a work environment if I couldn’t even ask a cleaning lady to use a different product or something like that. At first I was really hurt and angered by that response, but I think I handled it well and answered with kindness. It was like a wave of relief swept over me. We’re all in this together, and by responding positively it turned the exchange into an opportunity (sorry don’t mean to be all “bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles” here) to go high. We’re just all so tense right no w and I do really appreciate the people around here who step up to say “we will remain civil and kind”.

    • Anonymous says:

      +100. It’s making me sad to see this. I LOVE this group for the very reason that it’s so safe and so positive. I rarely go over to the main page because it’s often infiltrated with mean girls (or trolls?). Hope this page doesn’t start to go downhill too.

    • Anonymous says:

      I think it’s a consequence of the Moms site getting more popular. The main site used to be friendlier years ago – often then there was only one post a day with 100 comments. We often hit 100 plus comments a day now when it was only half that a few months ago.

      I read the main site but I collapse the comments and only expand the posts I’m interested in. Still lots of friendly posts over there.

    • Anon in NOVA says:

      I’ve been crankier over current events as well, but I think that’s why I value this space more and more. We all know there’s bigger issues in the world, but we still need recs for the best mittens for kids or where to get a maternity skirt etc. It’s a nice escape!

      I’ve been encouraged with the swift “nope, we don’t do that here” responses to individuals who come to judge or say hurtful things, so I hope that continues. We’re all just women trying to do our best at home, at work, and in life!

      • Anonymous says:

        Agree. I posted above about my husband’s work issue, and was really taken aback at the first response. Then, I was really grateful for the posters who jumped in with quick supportive posts and prevented the post from spiraling down a rabbit hole. (Update, he talked it through with superiors, and it’s not great, but it will be okay. I feel a lot less anxious, and am thankful for the kind reminders to be compassionate while waiting to hear what the initial feedback was. Now, I need to make sure I’m kind tonight when he comes home — I felt like I was holding my breath all day, and I need to make sure that the emotional hangover doesn’t turn into a “seriously?!! again?! how could you have let it happen again!!” fight.).

    • In addition to the above, I think we have a few trolls, or maybe it’s just easier to troll people in this political climate. I try my best to ignore the posts that are obviously intended to create conflict, but I don’t always succeed. Even though I sometimes feel compelled to respond, I do not let it bother me because I think it is par for the course on an internet forum.

      • PhilanthropyGirl says:

        There has been a significant uptick in trolls on the main s*te – I assumed they were coming to visit us as well.

    • Lurker says:

      I think a lot of people have spent their polite discourse capital on not strangling friends/relatives/coworkers over political differences. They are running out reserves for polite anonymous internet discourse. In the past, I’d take the time to explain why a comment is racist/sexist so someone could learn. Now I’m doing that in real life and when I see such a comment online I’m tempted to just say “no” or something less nice. Basically, I’m sick of being nice and taking the high road when it doesn’t seem to be getting me anywhere.

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