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I don’t know about you guys, but I’m not particularly fond of the way joggers look. Still, they can be a lifesaver if you’ve got a kid who, for example, has a waist size that’s big for his height, or likes to tuck his pants into his socks — there are a variety of functional reasons that joggers can be great for growing little boys. These are from a new brand on Amazon called Spotted Zebra (eligible for Prime), which has some really cool, bright colors. According to customer reviews, they run small but the quality is great. (No worries about sizing, though — these are eligible for free returns.) I usually get stuff like this from H&M but these are also really cute, and at 2 for $10, it’s hard to beat the price. They come in the pictured solid blue & camo, and also lightning bolts & gray. The size ranges are toddler boys, little boys, and big boys. Spotted Zebra Boys’ 2-Pack Joggers (FWIW, the brand has stuff for both boys and girls!) P.S. I’ve been pondering bringing on a writer to write these morning posts for CorporetteMoms — the ideal person has recently worked in a conservative office, is a bit of a fashionista, is a mom to young kids, and can reliably write things on a deadline. Anonymity is fine. You won’t get rich doing it, but it does pay and might make a nice side gig if you’re looking for extra money. See more details here! This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
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Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Anonanonanon says
I have some similar joggers for my son from H&M (as you mentioned). I don’t let him wear them out of the house, but they’re great for lounging around in something besides his underwear! We used to use shorts but he complained playing on the floor was cold in those in the winter.
Anon says
Why don’t you let him wear them out of the house?
Anonanonanon says
He’s almost 8, I just feel like he’s a bit too old to be out in the world in sweatpants. No judgement to anyone who feels otherwise, but he usually doesn’t come along for errands like grocery store etc. so if he’s leaving the house it’s for school, a restaurant, or an activity (such as a movie etc.) which I feel like he should at least summon up the energy to wear jeans for.
GCA says
I don’t know – my kid lives in Old Navy and Jumping Beans joggers at daycare because they’re comfortable, make durable play clothes, and are easy for him to pull down to go to the bathroom. I mean, you try napping in your jeans… Also, he’s 2, no one is judging him for his fashion sense (they can judge me all they like!) :)
GCA says
PS: joggers also great for girls in cold weather. #fromthedepartmentofparentsagainstimplicitlygenderedclothing
AIMS says
I buy them for my daughter, too.
Anon in NYC says
Yep – I buy joggers for my toddler daughter too. Easy to pull up and down, warmer than her usual leggings. Win win.
Anon says
+1. Both of my kids (son and daughter) lived in joggers for several months during the age of 2 while they were potty training. Super easy to pull up and down, easy to wash away any accidents, and still comfy to play and nap in. Fashion is not important when you regularly pee in your Paw Patrol underwear.
Anonanonanon says
Totally makes sense for lil’ ones. My son is in second grade so we’re past the age of wearing sweatpants out in the world often
anon says
I kind of don’t understand this post – Kat is saying that she doesn’t like joggers, but is recommending them…
mascot says
Eh, I think it’s fine to feature an item that’s good for you, not for me.
I’m not big into wearing athletic wear out of the house unless there is a workout somewhere in the rotation and I haven’t changed. But, my son loves to wear “athletics” on the weekends since he has to adhere to a collared shirts and chinos dress code for school. I’m fine with meeting him in the middle on this and offering trendier athleisure wear as an alternative to his millions of sport uniform garments. So posts like this are helpful for ideas.
GCA says
Ha, that makes sense. He can always pick up sweatpants again when he goes off to college and makes his own laundry decisions.
Anonymous says
My kindergartner cannot snap his pants and never asks for help with them at school, so spends all day with pants unsnapped if send him out without elastic waists. And he really likes “soft pants,” so he mostly has joggers. He’s in kindergarten, not a board meeting.
farrleybear says
:) I love the joggers for ease, but my kiddo has just announced he only wants to wear jeans. Even tries to wear them to bed….
MSJ says
Yep, my preschooler lives in joggers. For our lifestyle there is no upside in fussy clothes
Onlyworkingmomintulsa says
I’m with you for all of the same reasons. Joggers are comfy, easy to pull down and don’t need to be cuffed, perfect pants for a little boy.
Onlyworkingmomintulsa says
or girl! Just remembered, my daughter has joggers too. My son just happens to wear them to daycare everyday.
GCA says
Substantive question for the day: I know this has come up a bit before, but if you avoid Amazon for ethical reasons, what are your alternatives for
a) sites with a large and diverse selection of children’s books, new and secondhand
b) hard-to-find ingredients (I do a fair bit of Southeast Asian and Chinese cooking, and it’s not always easy to find some of the more arcane ingredients, like tamarind or preserved radish)
I’m trying to phase out my Amazon use, but darn if it isn’t convenient to shop for everything in one place. Almost everything else I need regularly, I can get from, say, Target.
anon8 says
Are there any ethnic grocery stores in your area? There is an Indian grocery store I go to sometimes that has tamarind.
Anon in NYC says
Agreed about the ethnic grocery stores, even if it’s one that is not specifically Southeast Asian or Chinese-focused. And, depending on your area, natural food stores could be a good option for things like tamarind. Another idea is to look at the resources listed in any SE Asian/Chinese cookbooks – I find that with a lot of the more recent cookbooks that the author will include a list of stores (physical and online) to get some of the ingredients they use. If none of yours do, maybe you can swing by a bookstore and browse through some cookbooks and see if they list places.
In terms of online books, have you looked at the Strand? It’s a huge bookstore in NYC, has a decent online presence, and new/used books.
Sabba says
It is not as convenient as going to one site, but I often use Amazon to look up products and then go directly to the manufacturer’s website to buy it. That may work for ingredients if there is a Southeast Asian or Chinese or other spice company that makes the ingredients you want–like Penzey’s Spices. For books, it is harder, but you could probably set up a relationship with a local book store and email them when you want something and stop by a few days later to pick it up. I’ll admit to still buying books on Amazon, though. I use other alternatives when I can.
Anonymous says
There are only ~2,000 independently owned bookstores in America (and I’m related to the owners of one!), and they really, really would love to pull books for you! And they might even have great suggestions about ones you haven’t run across yet. And depending on the owners (like my family!), they may even remember that little Susie loves ponies, so they’ll set aside a new release for you, etc.
Mama Llama says
I’ve been trying to switch for ethical reasons too, and I’ve had pretty good luck with Barnes and Noble. The downsides are that they don’t have the “look inside” feature (so sometimes I go to Amazon to look at the book before ordering it from B&N) and the shipping takes a little longer. But I’ve been happy with all of my purchases.
AIMS says
I don’t avoid amazon for ethical reasons; I use it for diapers and last minute gifts, etc.
But both of the things you mention I actually get in person or from Barnes and Noble/Powell’s. You can also find some Asian grocery items at Trader Joe’s, World Market, and at specialty online grocers (if you don’t have an in person option).
AIMS says
Also – google local used book stores. That’s where I often get kids books (& then can also donate the books we got that we didn’t love).
And how funny is it that Barnes and Noble went from being the big bad monster that was putting independent book shops out of business to the underdog we feel good about supporting?
Mama Llama says
Yes, I’ve thought about how funny that is too! The thing is, a couple years ago I tried to stop using Amazon and shop locally for everything instead, and it went horribly. I was spending so much time shopping (or more accurately for this area, sitting in traffic to try to get to stores) and getting worse quality products that broke quickly, so I gave it up. But I recently had this epiphany that it doesn’t have to be Amazon or locally, ethically produced artisinal goods – I can go for a middle ground and order from other “big” names instead. Maybe their labor practices aren’t much better than Amazon, but at least I’m spreading it around a little and not contributing to Amazon’s total retail dominance.
GCA says
I’ve definitely contemplated that! Funny, isn’t it? Luckily there is not only a large Barnes & Noble downtown, but also a number of great independent bookstores in the area, and I love wandering around them to nerd out (and spend far too much money) when I get the chance. It’s great for gifts, but our books get so much sticky-fingered toddler love that I like to get them secondhand where possible.
Anonymous says
Most of the second hand books on Amazon are coming from 3rd parties, often Goodwill stores, FWIW. My husband gets his used fiction from Better World Books, which I think has kids books too. You can also try Abebooks.
GCA says
Thanks! Will try those.
Anonymous says
I use Costoc. They usually have a good selection of hard to find food in their stores and the large package sizes mean I only need to restock every 3-4 months. If I get find ghee at my small Canadian city Costco, I’m sure yours would have a decent selection.
Costco (at least in Canada) pays their employees well and they have reasonable hours for workers.
Anon says
I buy a ton of stuff from Jet that I started supporting when they were a small start up. They have now been purchased by Walmart. Yay for success but boo that I’m now supporting Walmart instead.
Anonymous says
Hi Kat, is be interested in writing. Can you post the link for more information?
Kat G says
Sorry about that — posted it above too! Thrilled you guys are interested! http://corporettemoms.com/write-for-corporettemoms/
Anonymous says
I’d* and I promise I wouldn’t write posts on my iPhone. ;)
CPA Lady says
What do you do when you and your spouse have very different parenting styles? My husband has expectations that I think are unreasonable (instant docile and cheerful compliance from our three year old every time he asks her to do something) and he gets so frustrated with her and seems completely unable to deescalate a situation. Like when he tells her to do something she doesn’t want to and she starts fussing, instead of distracting her or joking with her or doing something to get her to chill out and comply, he just starts barking orders at her, then she goes into full blown tantrum mode, and then he puts her in time out. And then he gives her a lecture about how she needs to listen and do what he says. Rinse repeat.
I am torn between backing off and saying something. I solo parent most of the time so it really bothers me that the small amount of time they see each other are filled with tantrums and time outs and lectures. Ugh.
Pigpen's Mama says
We have the same issue — I spend more time with my LO, I’ve got more tolerance for the low-level annoying three-year-old behavior and they just seem to feed off each other.
We started listening to the audio book of 1-2-3 Magic — it sounds hokey, but I think it helps in giving parents a framework to deescalate without giving in since it minimizes the arguing/cajoling on the parent’s part. I framed it as something that would be good for both of us (which is true) and having someone else tell my H how to deal with a 3-yr-old is better than me trying to do that.
Good luck! I know how frustrating this is!
Pigpen's Mama says
One other thing that I noticed is that my husband really has no frame of reference as to how 2-4 year olds really act. I’m the one who usually goes to the birthday parties and sees more kids a daycare drop off, and I regularly talk to friends (virtual and in real life) with kids in the same age range, so I don’t see my LO’s acting up as anything more than typical little kid behavior, whereas he tends to take it more seriously/personally.
Anonanonanon says
When my ex and I tried marriage counseling as a last-ditch effort (though I really went into it more as co-parenting counseling) she recommended that he read 1-2-3 magic.
His issue was unrealistic expectations as well, though a bit of a different kind. For example, when my son was a toddler I’d make it clear before every outing that his only choices were ride in the stroller or walk. My ex-husband would carry the toddler on his shoulders, carry him around, then suddenly be like “I’m too tired you have to walk now” and not understand why a toddler didn’t understand the sudden shift in rules mid-outing, and dared ask to be picked back up.
Reader R says
I’m in a similar situation – solo parent most of the time, two very strong willed children, spouse with a very different parenting style that basically leads to tantrums and lectures.
I haven’t figured out a magic key yet. Lately I’ve been leaving the house more at times when he’s home, so he has to learn how to deal with the kids in a productive way. Like, great that you want her to set the table, but screaming at her when she doesn’t immediately jump away from her markers isn’t productive in the slightest. Lecturing is just going to delay the table setting PLUS distract you from making dinner PLUS not get your point across – it’s way better to deescalate and get her to comply nicely than it is to eat a burnt dinner through tears 30 minutes later.
I’ve tried talking to him later, after kids are in bed, about the consequences of what he’s doing, and suggesting alternatives. My dad had a similar personality against my very strong will, and it really tarnished my relationship with him for most of my childhood and adulthood. I don’t want that for DH and the kids. I’ve even given him some books I’ve read (Siblings without Rivalry, Peaceful Parent Happy Kid, etc) to try to unlearn my dad’s methods in me, and suggested he might benefit too.
I’ve also tried yelling at him in the moment about how he’s making it worse and doing it ALL WRONG and if he’s shocked that kids need patience then where the hell has he been for the past 5 years.
Spoiler alert, neither of those work, but one is much less stressful for me… But I don’t have a good answer yet. He’s a good guy, but at some point he’s got to realize that 18+ more years of butting heads with the kids isn’t going to make our home a happy one.
Anonymous says
He isn’t a good guy. He’s abusing your kids!!
avocado says
My husband is the same way. He was supposedly a perfect child who obeyed his parents cheerfully and without question 100% of the time (this claim is confirmed by his parents and siblings, but really I just think they never asked much of him). His parents are also really old and parented in a very old-fashioned authoritarian style that seemed totally normal to them but would not be acceptable by today’s standards. He also doesn’t have a lot of exposure to other kids, so his expectations can be unreasonable.
The strategies that have been moderately successful for me have been:
1) Implementing incentive systems for good behavior. When my kid was younger we used sticker charts with rewards for all sorts of reasons. Whenever there is a sticker chart, the kid is more likely to want to do what she’s supposed to do, and dad is more likely to remind her that she’s about to lose her sticker instead of immediately yelling.
2) Finding workarounds to reduce or avoid the behaviors that really set him off. For example, she takes forever to get out of the shower, which drives him nuts because he absolutely detests dawdling and time-wasting. I bought her a terrycloth bathrobe to put on after showering, which has reduced the amount of time she spends standing in there motionless wrapped in her towel.
3) Convincing him to read a carefully selected parenting book by letting him think it was his idea.
CPA Lady says
YES! My husband claims he was a perfect child too! Which, knowing him, he probably was.
avocado says
Your husband sounds a lot like mine, so this may also be helpful in understanding his behavior: Another contributing factor is that my husband is very hung up on “respect.” He thinks that if the kid fails to do exactly what he says, immediately and without complaint, she is demonstrating disrespect for him. It really makes him angry. Having him read about normal childhood development and what respect truly means helped to some degree.
Anon says
Were either of your husbands military? I had a few friends with military dads and I remember that we had to be on 100% perfect behavior at those houses and do as we were told, not ask questions, not talk back. I can remember this around age 6 or 7. I have a really strong memory of one dad in particular because I spilled a pitcher of red juice on his pale concrete patio and I was terrified of how he would react. Surprisingly, he knew it was an accident and cleaned it up but I was ready for screaming. Which in retrospect is a bit sad. Military dads seemed to be big on chain of command / authority. I’m not sure at what age we figured out we actually had to listen to them. While they got what they wanted (we followed orders) we certainly didn’t enjoy spending time with them the way we did our friends friendlier dads.
avocado says
My husband was definitely not military, but his dad was Don Draper minus the philandering.
Anonymous says
You need to say, “What makes you think she will be instantly obedient?” And then give him some books on child development.
Why do parents (dads mostly, but moms too) think that they can get away with doing no research, study, thinking about kids? Do these people all go into their jobs totally unprepared? Do they expect to pass driving tests with no practice? Do they not get that VIDEO GAMES come with frickin tutorials and maybe kids are slightly more complicated than that?!?!?!?!
Your husband is totally and completely out of line.
Anonymous says
Yes but if your husband disagrees and does not believe he needs to read a book, what next?
Anonymous says
Divorce the abusive jerk and try for full custody. Protect your kids.
Betty says
Because “parenting” wasn’t a thing a generation ago. Most of our parents were not raised, nor were we, with expectations about developing a child’s inner psyche. In addition, we (especially mothers) are told that so much of “parenting” is natural, or should be, and that we should have this all effortlessly figured out. Many of us were not raised with ideal role models for parents, and we only begin to see how those role models impacted us when we are faced with handling our own children. And finally, books and research are great, but much of parenting is learned on the battlefield through trial and error. As with all things, it is never easy or straightforward, and if a book or research had a simple, uncontradicted answer, we would all know it by now.
Betty says
DH and I have been in this situation many many times! It was especially frustrating because he would claim to know all about child development and how kids behave (he’s an elem school principal) but then couldn’t move from teaching/principal to parenting. In other words, kids behave differently in a classroom with an authority (their teacher) than they do for their parents. DH was also raised in a “respect” is the most important thing family.
This may not work for everyone, but what helped us was to actually take a step back and work on our friendship/marriage first. We worked/are working on talking explicitly about what our values are as a family (i.e. respect at the cost of all else isn’t it), what we want our relationship with our kids to look like now and in the future, and what we want for our children. We also read/listened to an audiobook together (How to Talk) that seemed to level some of the expectations. I approached the audiobook with him as a way of saying that I wanted to learn something together, and that I didn’t want it to be me lecturing/telling him my interpretation of what I learned. Finally, I let him form his own relationship/way of doing things with the kids. I only step in (when I’m around) if I view it as actually, truly harmful, which is incredibly rare.
Anonymous says
” as a way of saying that I wanted to learn something together, and that I didn’t want it to be me lecturing/telling him my interpretation of what I learned. ”
This is a great approach – I also like the audio book idea vs. trying to get them to read a book
Anonymous says
He doesn’t have a different style. He has a bad inappropriate style and needs parenting lessons.
jlg says
Yes, please do post the link or info about becoming a contributor – the link in the text does not seem to be working.
Kat G says
Sorry about that — posted it above too! Thrilled you guys are interested! http://corporettemoms.com/write-for-corporettemoms/
lsw says
Best places to look for cute toddler swimwear? I’d like to get something that coordinates (rashguard and bottoms, or a one-piece that covers upper body) and is cute for my son. I’ve tried browsing BabyGap and Nordstrom online but didn’t see anything that was quite was I was looking for, and I buy a lot of his clothes locally, so I don’t shop online for toddler clothes that much.
anon says
I’ve found nice swimwear at Carter’s and Oshkosh. The price is right, too. Gap will have more stuff available in the spring — it’s just really slim pickings right now.
S says
Old Navy
AIMS says
Boden.
lsw says
How do you find that Boden clothes run for kids? I really like Jojo Maman Bebe and Hanna Andersson but I have found that they both run super small on my kid. I’ll check out the measurement chart but just curious if you had feedback. My son is pretty tall and not very chubby.
AIMS says
For the most part a bit large. Comparable to baby gap and H&M.my daughter is fairly big for her age (usually somewhere in the 80th percentile for both height and weight) and I can mostly buy the size that correlates to her age (I size up in old navy and carters). Their charts are pretty good.
AIMS says
You may also want to check Gymboree – I recently bought some swim stuff there on clearance and they had a lot of options (a month ago, maybe). I have to size up there, FYI.
lala says
Boden runs large for boys, at least that has been my experience.
lsw says
Thanks! I’m going to check back at all these places. We don’t need it for a couple months, I’m just excited about going to the beach!
Anonanonanon says
I always had surprisingly good luck in-store at Old Navy for my son. A HUGE selection of swim trunks and coordinating rash guards, and a lot of options for rash guards that don’t have writing on them (I get tired of the fake swim team logos, the “San Diego” with a shark or whatever when it’s not from san diego at all, etc.). Also, it’s usually collections that will allow you to mix and match the rash guards and trunks with a little planning, which I’ve appreciated because sometimes we want a short-sleeved or long-sleeved etc. Also cute little coordinating swim shoes.
Anonanonanon says
Go soon though! Spring Break is around the corner and the cute stuff starts to fly off the shelves
Sabba says
Hanna Andersson
Anonymous says
Swim Outlet
I get all my workout swimming gear there and all my kids stuff too. Though I tend to pick up next year’s size at Old Navy for the outdoor swim gear (playing in the fountains in the park / going to the beach).
Anon says
My experiences so far:
-Gap – great quality – generally our favorite for swim – esp. zip-up rash guards
-Boden – super cute, but shorts faded (admittedly, after a lot of wear, and might have just been a one-off)
-Target – just fine, have characters if your kid is into anything in particular, the cat & jack stuff is cute
-Old Navy – no complaints
-H&M – surprisingly good quality for the price
-Tucker & Tate (nordstrom) – good quality
-Carter’s – no complaints – on par with Old Navy/Target
-Children’s place – not great quality
-Hatley – really good quality, available on Amazon
-Kanu Surf -we’ve only bought a rash guard from this brand (available on Amazon), but it had UV protection and we liked it a lot
I haven’t bought any swimwear from Hanna but their quality tends to be excellent.
Cate says
I like Hanna for good coverage suits.
ANon says
Cat & Jack at Target has cute swim separates.
lala says
Tea Collection has been my go-to for cute boy’s swimsuits, but they do fade (we wear them weekly for swimming lessons and then various summer/vacation beach outings, so I don’t have high expectations for no fading).
Boden and Peek are my other favorites, but I don’t have direct experience with their swimwear.
shortperson says
tea collection. runs one size too small on swimwear. gorgeous prints and good mix and match options. we also buy basics on primary. and boden terry coverups.
anon says
LOL! Truer words have never been spoken.
My DD lives in leggings, partly for this reason. She has one pair of joggers that are ADORABLE on her, but they’re her least favorite pair of pants because they’re not “fancy enough.” Yes, I live with Fancy Nancy.
shortperson says
jcrew has some sparkly joggers for girls
Friday anon says
I’ve started my two elementary age kids in early evening swim classes. Twice a week, we rush from after school care to swim school for a quick lesson and then either go straight home or stop for dinner out before going home. I’m looking to crowd source ideas for gear and hacks to make these a bit easier. Like recommendations for a good after-swim shampoo/soap, good bag/strategy for bringing home 2 wet towels and 2 wet suits + rashguards. Also wondering how to handle washing said wet things mid-week when we usually do laundry on the weekends. Also, is it crazy to bring the kids home in their damp suits (15 minute drive) and then shower them at home?
Momata says
My kids are both in swim class (although on the weekends). I shower them in the locker room with the soap in the locker room. I run their suits through the suit-drying centrifuge and wrap them up in the towels, and put that all in a canvas bag. Then when I get home I just throw that stuff in the laundry with whatever “colors” have accumulated. It’s not always a full load bu the wet stuff can’t just sit around. I would be afraid of swamp butt and swampy carseats and cold kids if I let them just ride home in their suits. If you pack their PJs then they are all showered and dressed for bed!
Anonymous says
I’m a former competitive swimmer, and I never washed my suit and towel after every practice, so I don’t think you need to do that after every class. (They will last longer if you do, but kids outgrow suits before they wear out anyway). Just hang it up to dry and wash once a week. I also do not force him to shower or rinse off, because again, I never did. We like the IKEA hooded towel – not super thick so dries fast, easy to wear. If it isn’t very cold where you are you can definitely wear suits and towels home. I think the blue IKEA bags are great for carrying around a pile of wet stuff.
Lyssa says
Agree with this. We don’t do classes, but we don’t make a point of washing selves or stuff after swimming in the neighborhood pool, and it’s never been a problem (I think that I usually washed the kids when they were actual infants, just in case their skin was sensitive). Just hang towels and suits up somewhere, and throw them in the wash whenever.
CPA Lady says
I use a large wet bag meant for cloth diapers for wet swimsuits and towels. It’s machine washable.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00G2G2ZPO/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o09_s00?ie=UTF8&th=1
GCA says
+1 for the cloth-diaper wet bag – we’re still getting mileage out of ours despite being out of diapers for a while! Rinse swimsuits thoroughly with fresh water, run them through the centrifuge, put them in the wet bag and just hang them up when you get home. Launder every week or so. <- also swam a lot growing up, though not competitively
avocado says
We have been through several summers of daily swimming, and it is just too much to wash swimsuits and towels every time they’re used. We put up towel bars and hooks in our downstairs half-bath (if we had a laundry room I’d have put them in there) and hang wet swimsuits, cover-ups, and towels to dry so they don’t mildew. We have at least two sets of towels and swimsuits for each person so they have 48 hours to dry before being repacked. We wash them all on the weekend.
mascot says
I like the Babo swim and sport shampoo/wash. It’s gentler on the scalp than UltraSwim and some of the other clarifying shampoos. Plus, it doubles as a body wash. It’s all my son uses in the summer and he is in the pool almost daily.
For suits, rinse them in cold water and hang to dry. I wash them every 2-3 pool swims, beach swims need washing each time because of the sand. f they don’t get too cold and need towels to wrap up in on the pool deck, you might want to look a swim shammy instead of full size towels. The pool water may be cold, but the building for indoor pools are usually pretty warm. Dry them off and then throw on clothes. You can also get a waterproof pad for their booster seat if you don’t want to change until you get home.
Anon says
Ugh – replied below by accident.
EP-er says
We do weekday swim lessons. They vary in time/day based on when the kids level up, but when we had right after school lessons this is what it looked like:
Pick kids up from school, go home, eat a light snack. Swim bag is packed from the week before. Grab packed bag & head to car. Swim lessons, rinse off shower. Change to street clothes. Pick up pizza or have husband start on something simple. Immediately throw swim suit & towels in washer. Eat dinner. Kids shower/bathe. Wet towels in the dryer. Once everything is dry, immediately repack back swim bag and put in closet until next week.
Anon says
I swam for six years – I was not any good but I do understand the logistics challenges! Any kids’ shampoo/soap combo is fine, IMHO, but make sure they’re putting on lotion after they shower. Chlorine is so hard on your skin. I think it’s fine to let them do a quick rinse at the pool shower, towel off, maybe switch their rash guards for a t-shirt, then go to dinner, then go home and take a real shower. Showering at pool facilities is usually kinda gross, and you’d have to pack shower shoes if they’re not already wearing flip flops. If I were you, I’d get a big waterproof bag to dump their wet stuff in, like a sea bag. Wash their towels when you get home. I understand that you only do laundry once a week but wet towels will stink, especially two sets of them. You can just rinse and air dry the swimsuits and rash guards. I would not machine wash their suits: they will wear out really quickly. I think it’s great that your kids are swimming!
Anonymous says
I get them to do a quick spin in the shower and change into dry clothes. After supper they get a bath and hair wash/dry. My daughter’s hair is braided for the lesson. I leave the braid in, squeeze water out with a microfibre towel, or unbraid squeeze out water with a microfibre towel and do a pony tail. Put on a winter hat for going to the car.
Supper is either take out, slow cooker or super easy (pasta + jar of sauce).
Laundry – throw towels and swim suits in washer as soon as we get home (one load), into dryer after supper and into swim bag before I go to bed. Swim bag lives on a shelf in the laundry room. I do rest of the ordinary laundry on other days.
Anon in NYC says
We do a weekend swim lesson. My husband does not shower/have kiddo shower there (we’ll do a bath later that day at home). For all the wet clothes, we remove them at the time of the swim lesson and keep them in a wet bag until they get home, and they he hangs them over the shower rod in the bathroom so they dry out before he puts them in the laundry.
Anonymous says
I use a Scout brand bag with pockets for shampoo / conditioner / lotion / detangler / brush. I shower them there. There is so much more chorine in a kid-swim-lesson pool b/c of the pee / poop issue with them and it burns my eyes just being around the pool. I try to rinse the suits as they shower, then wrap them up with the wet towell in the bag and bring home and put on top of my laundry set. Maybe I do that day or later, depending on regular needs. Then I repack for the next lesson.
Anonymous says
Use a reusable grocery bag to corral all the wet stuff. Shower them off there. Can you use J&J baby soap/shampoo so your only bringing one bottle? And then yes, directly into PJs and fast food or takeout for dinner. But I think the real solution is not doing swim class during the week.
Anon says
Yes, change your kids before you put them in their carseats. My kids would complain the entire way home if I didn’t. You could consider buying them robes to change into if you aren’t stopping anywhere on the way home. We just change our kids into their pajamas.
Wash the swim stuff that night. It gets mildewy fast.
Shampoo/soap kind of depends on the facility. At our swim school, we kind of dislike the people who basically bathe their kids, but that’s because the showers are in a communal area and there are a very limited number of them – so you basically have older kids taking their time shampooing/conditioning while toddlers shiver and wait to rinse off. Whatever you do, try to be quick about it if there are people waiting in line.
For a bag, we bought the “Speedo Deluxe Ventilator Mesh Bag” on Amazon and have been very happy with it. Plenty of room to store 2 beach towels/2 sets of clothes/assorted sundry.
Mean girls says
Ugh. My kid has a mean girl in her elementary school class. Like says mean things just to be mean (you have no friends; no one likes you). This is really crushing for my kid.
We’ve pointed out that when I say true things, you can tell if they are true or not. And if a person says things, even if they are hard to hear (and true), a person can say things with love (your fly is down, you need deodorant) or to be mean. Consider the speaker and the intent before deciding if you want to ignore the person as a meanie. To quote Taylor Swift, Haters gonna hate.
Lately, though, the girl has become a hair-puller and a head-hitter (maybe more of a slap than a hit). We haven’t had this before. Kid isn’t sure if the teacher knows / sees. What do I do next? If it matters, this is our neighbhorhood public school in a bigger city in the SEUS, so a part of me feels that it’s ignorable if it doesn’t land the school on the 11:00 news.
Anonymous says
If it’s gotten into hair pulling/hitting, I would definitely tell the teacher. That is NOT ok for your daughter to go through at all. But to add in another perspective – the girl might (or probably) has something going on at home and this is the way she’s dealing with it. Her parents could fight a lot, she could be spanked a lot, etc….
Anonymous says
I was the mean kid growing up (caused by deep, deep insecurities). I might chat with your child’s teacher. “Hey, Billy tells me Joanne isn’t being very nice to him and is saying hurtful things like X and Y. I think at this age, those kinds of hurtful comments could signal that maybe Joanne needs a little extra support. Would you keep an eye on it for a bit and let me know if you think I should talk to Joanne’s mom?”
Anonymous says
I’m 12:53. When I say insecurities, I mean both the superficial ones, like not having the cool school supplies, and the deeper, Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, ones (I wasn’t beaten and I wasn’t starving, but there wasn’t much to the bottom 3 layers of my triangle). The teachers who took me under their wings and believed in me and gave me stability and support really did a lot of good for me – that’s why I suggested the phrasing I did for talking to the teacher. Good luck. I know it’s hard to deal with when you’re feeling so defensive about your own child, but the other child probably needs something.
Anonymous says
In the meantime, this mom needs to make sure her child isn’t getting hit at school by another student. What should happen for the kid who gets hit vs the kid who hits?
IMO this is why my neighbors in my city don’t use public schools. It’s the perception that this stuff happens (and happens in the early grades) and nothing gets done and the teacher is too busy being social worker to teach. I hope it isn’t true, but I hear stories like this all.the.time and it makes me not want to give them a chance next year when my kids go to elementary school.
Anonymous says
Still 12:53…I went to private school. For 12 years. On scholarship. I am not at all saying OP’s child is unimportant – what I am saying is that all children are *equal* and that it’s helpful to remember we are talking about another *child* and that a sympathetic view of their conditions may be helpful as this mother grapples with an incredibly difficult situation.
You leapt to denigrating public schools and the assumption that this teacher won’t do anything when OP hasn’t indicated that. Children in private schools aren’t immune from emotional distress nor are all public school children troubled. Check your privilege.
Anonymous says
In my kids’ school, Joanne’s mom is not there. The kid showed up mid-year and the teacher has no parental contact info. Maybe the district office has it? The teacher doesn’t know and the other moms don’t know. The kid takes a bus home (not sure, not our bus) so no one has ever met the mom. Or the dad. Or the grandmother.
What then?
Anonymous says
Someone has that contact info. The office must have it otherwise how would they know what bus the kid gets on or how would the bus know to take her to which school? Teacher just doesn’t want to bother with it. Do you communicate via email? Email teacher and repeat request for issue to be addressed. If it is not, email principal.
Anonymous says
I don’t think that school districts give out parent info to other parents. Especially in a charged situation.
Anon in NYC says
The school won’t give that information out, but if you escalate it, someone will be able to reach out to the child’s guardian.
Anon 1:20pm says
I 100% agree that they don’t give out info of other parents. Maybe I misread with how the comments are threading but I thought she was saying that the teacher wasn’t able to contact Joanne’s mom for the teacher to talk about the issues.
My daughter had some issues with a boy in her class at the beginning of the year. I let the teacher know via email (creating a paper trail), and it was dealt with. I never spoke with the other parent about it at all. I would never deal directly with another parent on these issues without also having a teacher or principal present.
Pogo says
Another swim question – best swim diapers? Are reusable or disposable better options?
Anon in NYC says
We bought reusable ones, but in the end, the disposable were more convenient for us. We just use whatever is available at Target (I think we’re using pampers right now).
anon says
I liked the iPlay swim diapers. Target and Amazon both carry them. I preferred using a reusable swim diaper. It was easy to wash with the rest of our swim gear and took no extra effort whatsoever . Disposable ones get saggy and I think the reusable ones do a better job of containing mess if it happens. Plus, you always risk running out of them at the worst possible time. :) Our family does a lot of indoor swimming in the winter, and the YMCA and other pools where we swim don’t allow disposables at all.
Anon says
+1 we love iPlay. Some swim schools require resusable swim diapers.
Onlyworkingmomintulsa says
Another vote for iPlay. Our swim school requires resuasble swim diapers and they have been great for us.
Anonymous says
My son has always been full of sH*t, so I often used a disposable with an iPlay on top of it for good measure.
Anon says
+1 This is what I use. Either Pampers or Huggies with an iPlay over it.
Anonymous says
It’s been two months since I weaned my 14-mo twins, and the weight is creeping back on. I’m not surprised but still disappointed as I don’t feel I’ve been overeating. But then, after 14 months of BFing twins, 9 months of twin pregnancy, and countless months of infertility, I’ve probably forgotten how much I actually need to eat. Any tips or commiseration from the BTDT crew?
shortperson says
no, it sucks. i just keep thinking, would i have eaten this in college? if not, my mid thirties metabolism def cant handle it and usually say no.
Anonymous says
This happened to me after I weaned my twins at 16 months. I was so used to eating for three that I had no idea how to eat for one. Bad news is, you can eat way less than you’re used to. Good news is I did Weight Watchers for a few months and it was great way to relearn how much actual food I needed to lose weight and maintain weight. I set a modest weightloss goal of 10 lbs and followed the meal planning. I avoid the WW branded foods/didn’t eat aspartame etc. So basically the WW plan with a real food focus. You can do it online if you want to avoid meetings.
HSAL says
Well, learned about surprise twins this morning at the anatomy ultrasound. I’m 19 weeks with a 2 year old at home. I have no idea what we’re going to do. I cried so hard they called in a social worker, so I guess at least I have a good story out of it for now?
Anonymous says
We don’t have an older child, but I have twins and they are really a joy. I know it is a shock– at least we found out at 7 weeks!!– but you’ve got this. You had the older one to practice on and they really do start entertaining each other really early. Ours are 2 now and mealtimes are a little cacophanous but overall I think we can let them do their own thing a little more because they always have company. Is there anything in particular you are concerned about?
Anonanonanon says
Oh my gosh and you had no idea until 19 weeks? What a huge adjustment. I don’t have twins so have no advice, but I do agree the social worker thing will make a funny story down the road when you’ve adjusted :)
Anon in NYC says
Aw, congrats. A friend had a single kid and then had surprise twins shortly thereafter. They were really freaked out when they found out! I just recently spoke with her and she said it has had its ups and downs.
Principal up being: the way the twins love each other. It’s like no other relationship in the house – different from how each twin individually acts with their older sibling or their parents.
Principal downs being: it’s just hard when they’re all young and all need you in similar and different ways. The amount of help you need day to day is tremendous – friend has an involved spouse, an au pair, a part-time nanny, and one set of involved grandparents. If you don’t have helpful family nearby, then you have to buy that support.
Overall, she’s very happy albeit tired.
Anonymous says
Congrats!
It will seem impossibly hard at the beginning but it will be okay and even really amazing. Three is different from just twins and a chunk harder. Keep your oldest child in fulltime childcare as her whole world at home is about to be rocked so it’s great if you can keep her daytime world the same. Do not feel guilty about this.
Get a postpartum doula to help take care of you and the babies initially. Look into having some mother’s helper assistance as well. Even having a high school student who comes over three times a week to help for 3 hours will be a huge assistance.
Lower your standards. Hardest thing for me to accept was that I could not parent all three with the same level of involvement and intensity that I had parented by oldest. She was EBF and never had a bottle until I went back to work and never had bottles at home. The twins were 50-50 BM and formula from the beginning because I couldn’t make enough milk. If 2/3 are not crying you’re winning.
Mine are older now and listening in on conversations between the twins is one of my favorite things.
Anonymous says
Yes! My twins are four and listening to them talk in their cribs at the end of the day when they are digesting everything that happened that day is the best.
You can do this. It is hard, but not impossible. I also think that when you have twins you parent in a way you would not with a singleton. For instance, I did parent-led everything: feeding, naps, playtime. Nothing was on demand and this made my life a lot easier and more predictable. You will find what works best for you.
Also, your two year old will start to get easier soon as she is more and more able to take care of herself.
BC says
I am a twin and have an older sibling in addition to my twin. My parents have told me that having us twins was easier than having my brother as an only because they already knew what to do/what not to sweat.
Anonymous says
I hope this isn’t completely unhelpful, because my heart goes out to you – I would be completely freaking out too – but in case a “it could be worse” story is uplifting: my aunt she learned she was having twins when she was in labor, thanks to an x-ray which revealed what appeared to be a two-headed baby (learning it was actually 2 seperate babies came as something of a relief). And her husband was stationed in the Pacific at the time – this was during the Vietnam War, and he was in the Air Force – and wasn’t able to get home for several months.
Anon says
We also learned about our surprise twins at the anatomy ultrasound and were equally shocked, though we don’t have an older child. I don’t think either of us slept much from freaking out, but fast-foward a year and a half and I can’t imagine life without both of them. The newborn part is hard and there are definitely times we envied the easy life of our friends with singletons, but watching them play together and interact is so great. And yes, down the road you’ll have a great story. Everyone is amazed when we say the first 2 ultrasounds managed to miss baby B.
Depending on the kind of twins you might need to set up appointments with a specialists so something to keep in mind.
Anon says
For HSAL, obviously.
Anonymous says
Anyone have parenting book recommendations for early toddlerhood? Our twins are 22 months. I think it would be useful to get closer to a “parenting philosophy” with scripts and stuff than our current method of “react on the spot and try to be patient,” but a lot of books seem like they cover more of the 3’s and 4’s– willful but at least verbal! Ours can barely talk yet.
lsw says
I recently read The Emotional Life of the Toddler which I found insightful. I also read the Janet Lansbury book called something like “Toddler Discipline without Shame,” which I take with a grain of salt. I like some of the messages (and enjoy her blog) but the book read like a stapled together package of blog posts. And some of her stuff is a little crunchy for me. Still worth a read.
Anonymous says
This is not specific to that age, but I really like “Becoming the Parent You Want to Be” – it encourages an introspective approach (as the title implies) with the philosophy of there isn’t one right way to be a parent, but it is still fairly practical
Well intentioned shopping says
How do you handle gifts of clothes that are not in line with how you want your kids / your kids want to dress?
My MIL and my mom constantly buy clothes for my girls (3 and 5, so they have Opinions in these things and choose their own outfits each day). My kids won’t wear (or I don’t want them wearing, in the case of some shirts with sayings…) what they send up. Part of it is the style, part is the fit.
I’ve tried approaching it by suggesting brands/styles that I know the kids will wear/like (in a variety of pricepounts- eg not just saying “only buy Patagonia and Hanna”). I’ve also tried giving generic feedback like. “X is really into bright colored dresses now!” Or “Y won’t wear courdery or anything plaid anymore…kids these days.”
I’m fine just saying “thanks,” but feel guilty because they spend a lot of time and a fair bit of money on this stuff, and it just gets thrown into the donate pile. Sometimes I can get them to put on an outfit for a day and I can take a pic, but then that’s it.
Ideas? I can sometimes take stuff back to exchange (MIL sometimes includes a gift receipt), in which case I let the kids pick their own stuff, but mostly it’s not stuff I can return easily.
And with my mom, she’ll ask about the clothes sometimes.
Anon says
I love that you let your kids have opinions about what they wear. I remember being forced to wear clothes that my grandmother MADE that were hideously out of style and being mortified at school.
Anon says
I think the difference is the constant barrage of clothes. I remember being forced to wear hideous sweatshirts to school when I was young, but I got maybe 2-3 outfits per year from each grandparent set. If OP is anything like my family and that of my friends, then grandparents send up a good 10 outfits every couple months, each. I swear, it’s how today’s Grandparents Who Live More Than 20 Minutes Away show their love.
OP, I have no advice for you but solidarity. I just feel guilty every time I send to donation and don’t have a picture to send. (Even without donating most of it, my kids still have large piles of clothes with tags when they move to a new size.) I’m trying to focus on my kids saying thank you even if they don’t love the gift, but I don’t know what else to do.
AIMS says
I just tell my mom the truth and she now generally texts me pictures before she buys something. For in-laws it’s trickier but I think you can just blame it on the kids. If it’s a relatively small amount of stuff, I might let it go.
Anonanonanon says
When you’re so pregnant that you pee a little when you cough…. but can’t see how noticeable it is because you can’t see past your belly. Awkward cellphone selfie time… Sigh.